Help Me be a Good Hostess!

[Anonymous]

The thought of entertaining and having friends over for drinks and dinner makes me very anxious. I know that I have basic knowledge of how to entertain, but I find myself always second-guessing all of my ideas and decisions, and I fear looking like a total novice. I have friends who seem to find it effortless. Everything is always ready or almost ready, so they're able to hang around with guests instead of being stuck in the kitchen the whole time.

Tell me - What do I need to have on hand, from appetizers, to alcohol, to plates and napkins etc. Are there any blogs I should be following?

Also, this is for more "on the fly", casual entertaining not the kind of entertaining where I need to start planning two weeks in advance

TIA!

[Anonymous]

Great thread! I have always wanted to be an impromptu hostess, where people drop by and have a glass of wine in the kitchen, or some tea and cake in the afternoon, or a friday night get-together on the porch.

I have a thread somewhere where people told me what to keep on stock in the freezer/pantry, etc.

I keep my front room immaculate. Porch and kitchen are passable but not always. Need to work on that.

TJs spinach artichoke dip in my freezer always. Second drink fridge well-stocked.

[Anonymous]

Buy a Mrs Smiths Dutch apple pie and keep it in your freezer. I always get compliments when I serve it. People like food that looks neat (uniformly cut up carrot sticks, neatly arranged crackers) and comes from a clean kitchen.

[Anonymous]

Keep a box of assorted crackers and a couple of nice cheeses on hand. Not sure how fancy you are, but you can also keep frozen appetizers in the freezer; Costco and Trader Joe’s have nice things but also Whole Foods samosas and mini-quiches will do in a pinch. Keep on hand a bottle of gin, whisky, and vodka, with dried lime powder and tonic. Have a bottle of red and a bottle of white wine (not Chardonnay). If you have room for a couple six-packs of a safe beer like Stella Artois or whatever, you could also do that. Have a plan in your mind for where people will sit and be ready to declutter that space quickly for guests. Have a drinks station, a place to set up the food. Have little plates and disposable cocktail napkins. You can keep some candles ready to put out for ambiance—the wide, long-burning kind so you can set them up and not have to tend them. Have a few playlists or stations ready to go in your phone, so you can have background music and choose it based on the vibe you want.

[Anonymous]

The above is good. I have like 20 little appetizer plates we use. And have freezer full of spanakopita and bake your own filled pastries from a local shop (turkey, cheese, spinach). Cheeses, dried fruit and nuts and something like clementines or even apple slices will do. Really quick to throw together a small spread to go with wine or drinks. But the thing that helps the most is practice. Dh was always very apprehensive with people coming but before covid we had them over a lot in the 10 years of marriage and have the set up down as to who does what. I also just stopped fussing too much. I spend more time on sorting out who will come and be relaxed and ask people questions about their lives etc.

[Anonymous]

I am upfront that I only host crappy dinner parties, and everyone still wants to come

https://www.thekitchn.com/5-rules-for-hosting-a-crappy-dinner-party-235815

[Anonymous]

Impromptu cocktails with the neighbors need not be stressful. Don’t invite too many people-1 or 2 couples. Less people = less stress. I always like to prepare (or buy) a few room temp or cold dips/appetizers (from a few nice cheeses to hummus). They can be ready to go when people arrive. This is why the charcuterie boards are so popular. Appetizers that require the oven can be heating while everyone gets their drinks. The following day, evaluate your menu. We’re some items too much work or too messy? I am willing to fuss with recipes, but not when people are there watching me or if it creates too much cleanup.

[Anonymous]

If nothing else I always have a chilled sparkling wine or champagne in fridge, my espresso/coffeemaker is one button (need to get some decaf beans!!)

[Anonymous]

These are all great tips. I am following it! I love to entertain, it gives me energy~ but so, so many people do not and I think are perplexed by it. Thank you for posting, I hope the suggestions propel you to invite couples over during this otherwise austere upcoming month!

[Anonymous]

I have a mental checklist when hosting casual wine and cheese type get togethers. These are easy.

1. Chill wine, beer, sparkling or seltzer water.
2. Put out cheese to warm to room temperature.
3. Give powder room quick clean; put out fresh hand towels.
4. Vacuum living room (dog hair) and wipe down kitchen counters and sink.
5. Pull out all glassware, make sure nothing is dusty.
6. Pull out appetizer plates (a good investment), ditto re. dust.
7. 10 minutes before guests arrive, plate cheese and crackers. Also plat some fruit or olives or charcuterie or nuts or something along those lines. Depending on time, may add nicer appetizers but these are easy basics.
8. Put out paper cocktail napkins (always have a stash).
9. Ask Alexa to play some background music.
10. If time, put out some tealight candles for ambiance.

Relax and have fun. If there are drinks and nibbles, a chair to sit on not covered in dog hair and a clean bathroom, your guests will be happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a mental checklist when hosting casual wine and cheese type get togethers. These are easy.

1. Chill wine, beer, sparkling or seltzer water.
2. Put out cheese to warm to room temperature.
3. Give powder room quick clean; put out fresh hand towels.
4. Vacuum living room (dog hair) and wipe down kitchen counters and sink.
5. Pull out all glassware, make sure nothing is dusty.
6. Pull out appetizer plates (a good investment), ditto re. dust.
7. 10 minutes before guests arrive, plate cheese and crackers. Also plat some fruit or olives or charcuterie or nuts or something along those lines. Depending on time, may add nicer appetizers but these are easy basics.
8. Put out paper cocktail napkins (always have a stash).
9. Ask Alexa to play some background music.
10. If time, put out some tealight candles for ambiance.

Relax and have fun. If there are drinks and nibbles, a chair to sit on not covered in dog hair and a clean bathroom, your guests will be happy.

No. Choose some decent music yourself.

[Anonymous]

OP here - these are such great suggestions! Keep them coming!

PS I'm relieved I'm not the only one that suffers from "entertaine-itis" !!

[Anonymous]

OP - you don't try to make this *change* during a pandemic

You're making it way too hard on yourself
and others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - you don't try to make this *change* during a pandemic

You're making it way too hard on yourself
and others.

OP here - where did I say I was planning to entertain right now? This is a general discussion (in the appropriate forum) with the assumption that the pandemic will eventually end, or become manageable. If I want to discuss the pandemic I'll go over to the health forum.

[Anonymous]

If you have people over for more than cheese and crackers make something like chili or baked ziti with bread and salad that you can make ahead and have ready. Never cook while guests are there.