Things to do with son’s GF during her visit

[Anonymous]

My son’s GF is visiting us for new year week. They’ll be exploring our town on their own but I would like to have some ideas to make time at home or any outings with family enjoyable for all. He is crazy about her and we’ve met twice during our visits to attend his athletic events at their out of state college. She’ll be with us from 30th-3rd.

[Anonymous]

What does she like to do? Is she outdoorsy? Does she like movies or board games?

[Anonymous]

Why don’t you just ask your son? Tell him you want to do something as a family and/or do something special, and ask what she would like and what would fit with their schedule/plans.

[Anonymous]

Skiing, trail walking, museums, out to eat.
My family did a roaming meal once where we went to one place for drinks/appetizers, another for dinner and a last for dessert (all within walking distance of each other) and it was a blast. We drew names to see who got to pick the restaurant for each course.

Games: Settlers of Catan, Castles, Ticket to Ride, Rook, Scattegories, Quiddler, Phase 10

Make home made pizzas and movie night
Cocoa and decorating cookies
Wine and cheese tasting (each buy a bottle and put in brown bags and rate each one)
Beer tasting flights and nachos (each buy 2 beers to share)

[Anonymous]

That's not a lot of time. Leave them be.

[Anonymous]

Go downtown to see the trees at the WH and the trains at the Botanical Gardens - both are outside/safe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's not a lot of time. Leave them be.

I agree with this. Does your son still have friends who live near you? If so, I would suspect that they will want to hang out with them quite a bit.

[Anonymous]

I met DH in college, and here's what I remember his mom doing when I visited: Making nice food for dinner. Loaning him the car. That's about it. Basically, she was a friendly presence who mostly stayed out of the way and let us spend time together! She's still my MIL and we get along very well.

With a kid in college now myself, I think her approach was a good one. Maybe I'd have an idea for a holiday movie we might enjoy if we were all in the for the evening, or an outing to see a holiday light show if my kid was also interested. Basically, I'd tell my kid we are happy to spend time with him and his girlfriend, but I'd understand if they're busy.

[Anonymous]

Have ideas, but not plans. Drop expectations. They may want down time, which is a rare during the last few weeks of a semester at college, with finals and whatnot.

They may want a lot of time alone, or with your son's friends in the area.

[Anonymous]

Your ideas are helpful. I’ll try to take their lead about how much time they want to spend with the family. Any other ideas or tips for how to make her feel at home, he said she is a worry hog and quite nervous about the trip and making a good impression.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your ideas are helpful. I’ll try to take their lead about how much time they want to spend with the family. Any other ideas or tips for how to make her feel at home, he said she is a worry hog and quite nervous about the trip and making a good impression.

"Worry hog"? First of all, don't ever use the word "hog" about her, in any context.

Just chill out. You sound like you are worrying. Just be nice, be polite, and take their cues--pay attention and if they say something, go with it. Like if you fuss over what to make for dinner and they suggest something easy like pizza, just go with it. If you planned for family Bingo night and they'd rather go out to a movie alone, just go with it. Don't fuss over them. Just chill and follow their cues.

[Anonymous]

I would put some effort into making sure she has everything that she might need when she is staying in your home. Items in the bathroom like towels, tissues, a cup at the sink. Make sure there is an extra blanket in case she runs cold. Make sure she knows where the coffee fixings are as well as some snacks. Confirm with your son about any food allergies or preferences. Having something special she likes such as her favorite snack/beverage will make it clear that you care about her and that you are happy she is there. This might seem crazy but... if you are on septic please have your son give his girl friend the rules about feminine hygiene product disposal. I grew up in a big city where we were taught to flush tampons. My college boyfriend, now husband, grew up with septic and clued me in before my first visit to his parents house. His older brother's college girlfriend had not been so informed and ended up clogging the system on her first visit!

Like pp suggested have some ideas on things to do such as seeing the White House and Capital trees and the trains at the Botanical garden and then lunch/dinner would be great.

[Anonymous]

Find reasons to leave your son and his girlfriend completely alone in your house for extended periods of time. I'm sure they'll figure out the rest by themselves.

[Anonymous]

Stop trying to control everything. Let people chill out and do nothing, let them be spontaneous. They can figure this out themselves without you micro-managing everything. It's on your SON to come up with things for them to do if she doesn't arrive saying "I want to go here, and I want to see this, I want to go to that..." .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Find reasons to leave your son and his girlfriend completely alone in your house for extended periods of time. I'm sure they'll figure out the rest by themselves.

Totally. You should just make some nice dinners, maybe do ONE special activity. Otherwise too much togetherness this early in the relationship could really cause problems for you guys down the road.