No response after sending flowers
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Anonymous
| A friend who lives on the opposite coast than me lost her father a few weeks ago. I waited until she was back in town from services for a few days before sending a condolence card and flowers. They were confirmed delivered and left by FedEx (signature not required). I haven’t heard from her since they were delivered (about 1.5 days). I know they are in town, and I’m presuming are just busy, but part of me wonders if the flowers could have been misdelivered or were left by a side door they don’t frequent. I am of course not demanding a thank you or anything at all like that, rather she’s the type of person who would let me know something was received, and I wanna make sure she got them .... but I don’t want to bother her at the same time. What would you do? Send a quick text or wait another couple days or not mention anything and see if I eventually hear from her? Trying to give her space as she settles back in, but I also know she would feel badly if the package was under a bush or something that she found a few weeks from now. |
Anonymous
|
Assume they were delivered and ask the next time you see her. Fedex is not going to leave flowers "under a bush" 99.5% chance that she is overwhelmed and just didn't reach out. 0.05% chance they were mis-delivered.
We lost my husband's mom this summer and there were so many moving parts that I know we dropped balls in terms of acknowledging things. Please don't call/text/email and make her feel like an ass for not reaching out to you to acknowledge the flowers. |
Anonymous
| Back off. Maybe she got them, maybe she didn't. When you do check in with her PLEASE don't ask about the flowers. She how she is doing. |
Anonymous
| This would be the last thing on my mind. Please don't bring this up. Assume they were delivered. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
| I would wait 48 hours total and then send a quick text message. I have had perishable things delivered to a side porch we never use and would never have known about it unless the gift giver gave me the heads up about it. |
Anonymous
| Meh, I would probably text message to check in. It sounds like it’s a good friend that this wouldn’t be intrusive. |
Anonymous
| Her dad just died. She's not thinking about thanking anyone for flowers. Check in on how she is doing, don't ask about the flowers. |
Anonymous
| If you are friendly with her DH sent a quick note saying "Hey I sent Larla flowers but the tracking isn't working and I don't want to bother her to ask if she got them. Do you know if they arrived? They're purple with a blue vase. I'm so sorry about Bob, Todd. Hope you guys are doing ok." |
Anonymous
+1000 don't make this about you, which is what you'll do if you ask about the flowers. |
Anonymous
Yep. Just check in, express condolences, ask how's she doing. |
Anonymous
| I would check in and ask it another day. Somebody sent me Omaha steaks and they were actually right next to a bush next to our front door which we don’t often use. The box was kind of obscured unless looking for it. I found it like 3 days later and of course all was rotten. I wish I had been clued in because it was a waste of money for them and gift for me. |
Anonymous
| Maybe she’s going to actually send a thank you note? Please don’t call after a day! |
Anonymous
| Why don’t you text her to ask how she’s doing? I lost my mom last year and those check-in texts from friends meant everything to me. I’m sure she will mention the flowers. And as others have said, after a parent dies, lots of things fall through the cracks. I could barely get dressed in the morning and I was not super timely in thanking people for stuff. I did my best. |
Anonymous
|
Don’t contact her about this so soon.
I did something like that after a friend had a baby. While I wanted to make sure the gift had arrived, I believe it came off as me seeking a thank you note. Awful. Please learn from my mistake. |