For a mom with a baby in the NICU?

[Anonymous]

Am wondering what might be the most helpful gift to get a new mom with a baby in the NICU (born very prematurely so baby will not be going home for a couple of months)? Or even words of encouragement, hope, etc to share. I thought maybe others who have managed through a NICU experience might have some good suggestions....

Thanks is advance....

[Anonymous]

if you want a gift- what about a gas card for all the trips back adn forth they will make to hospital?

[clarabow]

Ours was 5 weeks early, and although we knew we were not in for a lengthy NICU stay there were so many things we hadn't yet done on our "to do" list. Family and friends got us adorable premie outfits, which of course few people ever plan to buy, and asked my mom what we had not got around to getting yet. We also had a few close family/friends actually set everything up at our house -- when we got home the place was spotless and the nursery was organized and there were diapers, wipes, etc at our own bedside as well. That was huge.

My other thought, if the mom was planning to breastfeed, she may be pumping instead or supplementing and that might not have been what she was planning on. If you guys are close, help her know that it is OKAY and find out if she needs things that would not have been on her list, like bottles, freezer bags for milk, etc.

[Anonymous]

first off congratulate her on her baby ... offer to pray for her or sit with her help out how ever

sign up for those meals you make and freeze and just leave them at her house or bring over a meal each week like a lasagna and pan of chicken whatever that she can just heat up

if she hasnt got the baby a spot ready or finished yet your could offer to help with that (paint, put together the crib, whatever)

laugh and cry with her and let her know its okay to do both around you alot of time people try to stay strong but crying help so much sometimes

[Anonymous]

DD was 33 weeks and she was IUGR. We really appreciated preemie clothes. It made a difference to be able to dress her in some of her own clothes rather than the hospital clothes. Stick to onesies and sleepers without feet. Preemie are on monitors, have IV boards and pulse O2 monitors on their feet. For the parents, frozen meals that they can easily heat up. Travel size hand lotion is another good gift, my hands were bleeding from all the hand washing after a few weeks.

This gift depends on the person but we loved Dr Sears guide to premature babies. For us, it was helpful to read through the information. Its not heavy on AP(we did end up doing AP but I know its not everyone's choice) and was a good resource. If she has other kids offer to babysit or make family meals.

Be aware that things can change so fast on the NICU. Preemies between 24-29 weeks are very likely to encounter some serious set backs before they finally go home. Your friend and baby will have good days, bad days, and days when it never seems they will never leave the NICU. It can be very stressful when the baby gets closer to going home yet all of sudden one thing changes and you're there for a few more days.

[Anonymous]

How about gift cards for restaurants that are close to the hospital, so that they can scoot out and have a non-cafeteria meal?

[Anonymous]

Copied this from another hospital gift thread, where I advised the following:

"Having spent a lot of time bedside at Children's Hospital with my son, I can tell you that a small care package to be used in the hospital by visiting family can be really welcome. You can put in things like hard candies or throat lozenges (hospital air is so dry!), reusable water bottle that fits under the hospital water and ice dispenser, thermal cup to keep hot drinks hot along with stress-reducing herbal tea bags, unscented or lavender hand cream, magazines, chocolates, change for the vending machines, stationery and stamps, ...really, whatever comes to mind that would help family pass the time and would reduce their stress and help them be more comfortable in that environment."

[Anonymous]

I think getting the house clean and ready and freezer with a few meals would be heaven. She probably doesn't have it all ready if baby was early. Maybe set the nursery up with wipes and diapers. Make sure crib, if they use one, is ready. All the cloths are washed and readly. There are so many things you could do to help this family.

[Anonymous]

I had a nicu baby for a couple of weeks and husband and I drove back and forth to the hospital three times a day...I would have liked someone to go with me to give husband a break.

[Anonymous]

How about a hot homemade meal...offering to do chores in the house (which I'm sure have been neglected)...running errands...taking an "incubator-side" vigil (assuming you are allowed to visit NICU as a guest) so the new mom doesn't feel guilty about leaving her baby for some fresh air...supportive hugs to boost self esteem (especially if her pregnancy hormones are still all over the place).

Congrats to your friend. Be sure to giver her words of encouragement and tell her she is a beautiful mom for being so loving.

[Anonymous]

You are incredibly thoughtful and generous to help out your friend during such a stressful time.

[Anonymous]

a gift card to pamper herself would be nice also depending on what she likes (nails or hair) whatever and offer to sit with her baby whether she does it now or in 6 months when babies home she always has the option and knows the baby has someone by her side

[Anonymous]

a gift card to pamper herself would be nice also depending on what she likes (nails or hair) whatever and offer to sit with her baby whether she does it now or in 6 months when babies home she always has the option and knows the baby has someone by her side

[Anonymous]

Food for the freezer. Life is stressful enough without having to worry about meals. That was a big help to us when we were in the NICU.

[Anonymous]

I spent months in the hospital with DS due to health issues, both at CNMC and in NYC. Food is crucial. You stop eating because hospital food gets old / gross. Pack her a small meal and visit her when you can. Trader Joes makes very nice personal portion foods that can be microwaved at the hospital. My sister made sure I had personal size hygiene items packed in a small kit so I could brush teeth / etc. Magazines and maybe a book....

It really does all help, every bit of it. Also - JUST visiting...I remember that I felt guilty for leaving my DS's side, BUT when someone else sat in the room so i could WALK the hospital floors or run home to take a shower, I felt much much better. It wasn't like they would answer any questions from a medical team, but I felt better.