Strippers in hotel room

[Anonymous]

A couple of weekends ago, DH attended a bachelor party of a friend. He had to leave after dinner/a few drinks because we had an early flight the next morning and he didn't want to be exhausted. He did inform me that the best man was trying to convince him to stay because he had hired some strippers to come to the hotel room later that night. DH I guess tried to tell him to make sure these were strippers and not escorts before something bad happened.

Anyways, fast forward to this morning and I get a text from his friend's fiance (we are close) asking if I knew there were strippers in the hotel room. She's furious as I guess this crosses a line for her and told her soon to be husband this. Said strip club was ok, strippers in hotel rooms are not. I have not responded yet because I don't know what to say.

Should I tell her what DH told me? (i.e just that DH said the best man was telling him there were but I don't know for sure either way) or just tell her she needs to talk to best man/her soon to be husband?

Also, if you are ok with strip clubs, are you not ok with strippers in a hotel room? Something I hadn't really thought of before but now I'm thinking about it and can't make up my mind.

[Anonymous]

Why does she care what you knew, when? Weird.

Also, why does it matter where some skank gets naked for men who pay her? Why is the venue important?

[Anonymous]

Tell her what DH said, and let her know that you can't confirm it. Don't tell her who to call to find out -- let her take care of that.

Strippers in hotel rooms are a little different than a club because it is easier for them to take cash in exchange for sex. If all the guys are on the up and up -- it's no big deal. However, that isn't always the case…

Yuck!

[Anonymous]

You don't even know for sure so text and say you don't know. Don't be the one to start drama on hear say. Strippers at a club, hotel, or back alley, who cares... It's still a stripper. You and your husband sound uptight.

[Anonymous]

The man is obliged to eat meat loaf for the rest of his life. Let him enjoy his last piece of ice cream in peace!

[Anonymous]

I'd just you don't know, because you don't.

[Anonymous]

I would resopond , don't know what they're doing, ask (her own DH)! You aren't there, you don't know what they're doing..

[Anonymous]

Your information is heresy, so just tell the truth - you don't know what happened in the room b/c your husband left after drinks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You don't even know for sure so text and say you don't know. Don't be the one to start drama on hear say. Strippers at a club, hotel, or back alley, who cares... It's still a stripper. You and your husband sound uptight.

OP here. Ha far from uptight if you knew us. Before I met DH, he told me about a 21st bday party he went to where strippers were hired to come to the birthday boy's hotel room. Turned out they were actually escorts, so Dh was just warning the best man that it can happen.

I think she's probably reaching out to all wives/gfs in whose significant others were at the bachelor party because she now has suspicions and wants confirmation. The only reason I was going to tell her what DH told me is that when this all eventually comes out (which it will in some way) I don't want her to be pissed at me and accuse me of lying to her.

And yes, another PP hit the nail on the head. Some of these guys are not on the up and up. Cheaters, womanizers, etc. The type of guys who WOULD encourage a drunk groom to cross the line with a stripper.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don't even know for sure so text and say you don't know. Don't be the one to start drama on hear say. Strippers at a club, hotel, or back alley, who cares... It's still a stripper. You and your husband sound uptight.

OP here. Ha far from uptight if you knew us. Before I met DH, he told me about a 21st bday party he went to where strippers were hired to come to the birthday boy's hotel room. Turned out they were actually escorts, so Dh was just warning the best man that it can happen.

I think she's probably reaching out to all wives/gfs in whose significant others were at the bachelor party because she now has suspicions and wants confirmation. The only reason I was going to tell her what DH told me is that when this all eventually comes out (which it will in some way) I don't want her to be pissed at me and accuse me of lying to her.

And yes, another PP hit the nail on the head. Some of these guys are not on the up and up. Cheaters, womanizers, etc. The type of guys who WOULD encourage a drunk groom to cross the line with a stripper.

Once again, you weren't there. Your DH wasn't even there. Let it go.

[Anonymous]

The only question here is did anyone's genitals get wet?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don't even know for sure so text and say you don't know. Don't be the one to start drama on hear say. Strippers at a club, hotel, or back alley, who cares... It's still a stripper. You and your husband sound uptight.

OP here. Ha far from uptight if you knew us. Before I met DH, he told me about a 21st bday party he went to where strippers were hired to come to the birthday boy's hotel room. Turned out they were actually escorts, so Dh was just warning the best man that it can happen.

I think she's probably reaching out to all wives/gfs in whose significant others were at the bachelor party because she now has suspicions and wants confirmation. The only reason I was going to tell her what DH told me is that when this all eventually comes out (which it will in some way) I don't want her to be pissed at me and accuse me of lying to her.

And yes, another PP hit the nail on the head. Some of these guys are not on the up and up. Cheaters, womanizers, etc. The type of guys who WOULD encourage a drunk groom to cross the line with a stripper.

Nothing demonstrates a solid start to a marriage than having to get information from third sources to determine if your future husband is lying to you. I think you should tell her to ask her fiance and if she does not believe what he says, she should not marry him.

[Anonymous]

the fact that your husband left before the strippers "so he wouldn't be tired for an early flight" and then told you about the strippers is disappointing. He is absolutely considered uptight by his friends. That or totally whipped.

that being said, I can see why there is a difference between strip clubs and "in hotel" strippers. The ones that will come to your room are much more likely to be DTF.

[Anonymous]

Ugh, I know that the stripper bachelor party is a rite of passage to some but....

At any rate, I think I would just say "I don't know any of the details of that, dh had to leave early and couldn't stay - we had a plane to catch."

[Anonymous]

OP here. Decided to just say "sorry I don't know. DH left early"

And I don't think DH is considered uptight or whipped. He came home at 1am and we had to be leaving for the airport at 5am. And he told me in a "can you believe what best man did? That isn't going to go over well" type of way. We usually talk about things like that.