Kids still pretty emotionally dependent– will this change?

[Anonymous]

I would be hurt if my mom wanted to travel without me one if the few months I was home. My favorite person to travel with is my child. And they have a cold father. How is their self esteem? Do you think they feel loved?

(TBH-I am probably somewhat dependent on my child for some things…)

[Anonymous]

This is so sad. I can’t imagine planning a solo month long vacation over the summer when they are home. Don’t you have enough solo opportunity when they are in school? I mean there are what 8+ months that you could use for your vacay.

[Anonymous]

I agree with them — I would be hurt that my mom wanted to travel for a month when I’m only home for 10 weeks. Everyone away at college or living in a new city for the first time or, heck, in their 40s and raising kids wants to believe their mom misses them and wants nothing more than to spend time with them. You’ve just told your kids that you’d rather travel than see them. That doesn’t sound clingy to me.
That sounds completely reasonable.

I also have questions about what you’re doing that you can’t talk when they call. Would it work better for you all to set up times when you talk? You might be making them feel unimportant and like you feel you have better things to do.

Singed,
Adult woman whose mom is a master at letting me know she has more important things to do but still professes to miss me and my children “so so so much”

[Anonymous]

"Love, you know I'll always be here when you NEED me. But I know you are a capable adult who has all the day-to-day down even if we won't talk or see each other everyday/often as usual."

[Anonymous]

This is crazy.