Why do nannies on DCUM always think they go above and beyond?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

OP, I take serious issue with the part about employers expecting flexibility. If I tell my nanny her job ends at 6pm, I better be ready to allow her to walk out the door at 6pm. Of course, things happen, but they should be rare, and the nanny should be compensated well for extra time (and choose whether she can take on extra time). Of course she has a life outside of work! And whether it's to take care of her own children, or to live her life and fulfill her responsibilities, it's so selfish to think she needs to put that all aside for my needs and my life.

No, this is something you bring up in the interview and find a good match. Many employers, such as doctors or people with demanding jobs, choose a nanny because they know that they have an unpredictable schedule. If you don't bring up the need for availability and flexibility in the interview then I agree that its terrible to just randomly show up whenever but if this is something you need many nannies are able and willing to accomodate this. They need to be paid for all hours worked but there is no reason for this to be a shakedown of the employer. A nanny who is inconvenienced by this or or can't provide flexibility should turn down this offer.

The problem is that nannies are desperate for jobs and agree to anything upfront then get pissed that the job doesn't meet their fantasy. This attitude that I'm being taken advantage of because I need a job and its not my fault the employers are not offering terms I want is ridiculous.

Part of what you pay a nanny for is to reserve her time. This is why you set a schedule. If you want her available from 8-6, pay her from 8-6. If you want her available until whenever you please, you ought to pay her for it. You make the comparison to your job or that of a doctor or lawyer however it is not comparable. Those types of jobs pay people enough and give good enough benefits to warrant extreme dedication and drop of the hat availability. For the wage/salary many MBs on here desire to pay, you do not get round the clock availability or "above and beyond" dedication. You pay as little as possible for a service, outline a schedule, and desired duties. You can call me a horrible nanny, stupid, lazy or whatever but this is a business transaction. I am not claiming to be Mary Poppins. You pay me the wage we agreed on, and I will be available when we agreed on, and I will perform the duties we agreed on.

Haha, millions of people in the world are asked to stay late. You'll get paid extra if you stay extra. You're delusional if you think you should be paid an extra hour, 52 weeks a year, just because your employers might need you to stay late on a rare occasion.
Again, if you nannies didn't have nanny jobs you'd be working at the local mall making min wage. If you want to reap all the benefits of a real professional then have something to show for it or otherwise, be quiet. Your comment is the reason why nannies typically get a bad rep as being called lazy, unprofessional and entitled. Take your job seriously instead of trying to reel in extra money you didn't work for. Because let's be honest, it won't be good enough for you. You'll still find another reason to complain.

Really all I can get is a min wage mall job.

Damn wish someone should have told me that before I went and spent money on college. Oh but that's ok because I'm probably poor too and have bad credit. Aww man guess graduating hs a year early and starting college was a waste of my time.
Thank you poster for setting me straight!!!! By the way how many degrees do you have??? I have 3 I don't nanny because I can't find other work - I nanny because it's what I love to do.
And my college debt is paid off, so is my house and I just got a new car. Guess if I'm so stupid I can only get a min wage job I must be doing something right.

Come back when your darling little child is serving me at the McDonalds drive thru or bagging my groceries.

[Anonymous]

The nanny's on this board are always angry and ill tempered. Makes me sick.
-the 10:03 nanny from this thread

[Anonymous]

I am so sick of people like you posting on these forums. Unloading a dishwasher is considered light housekeeping and so is doing the children's laundry. Are you a little bitter that you aren't raising your own children? Sure as hell sounds like it. I'm so glad my MB doesn't have the mindset of you DC area MB's. I don't go around stating that I go above and beyond, MB and DB both acknowledge how much their children are thriving since I've been caring for them.

Doing children's laundry is a pretty standard nanny responsibility.

(OP, you are hilariously correct.)

[Anonymous]

That is because I do!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I noticed most nannies who post on DCUM write that they are awesome nannies who ''go above and beyond'' and boast about how much of an asset they. They then start to write all the things they do that makes them so great and at the same time they're subtly defaming their employers and making them look like bad parents.

+100 Its very amusing. I love how they go on about how they go above and beyond and then two seconds later are going on about how they are entitled to nap, run their own errands, and offended at the idea of doing anything beyond the bare minimum that is spelled out in their contract. They seem to think that their mere presence in showing up to work on time is what constitutes above and beyond. I've never seen a group of people so lacking in self awareness.

My favorite is one is nannydeb. She is so awesome and amazing because she spends 20 minutes a day tidying up after herself. She really is a stellar catch. She isn't smart enough to be able to unload a dishwasher in less than 20 minutes (it takes a lot of brainpower remembering where the plates go, you know) but she still does everyday and counts it as her primary light housekeeping task. Poor taken advantage of nanny, she really deserves a few mini spa days for having to clean up after herself and unload the dishwasher.

I am so sick of people like you posting on these forums. Unloading a dishwasher is considered light housekeeping and so is doing the children's laundry. Are you a little bitter that you aren't raising your own children? Sure as hell sounds like it. I'm so glad my MB doesn't have the mindset of you DC area MB's. I don't go around stating that I go above and beyond, MB and DB both acknowledge how much their children are thriving since I've been caring for them.

Nanny here. Doing children's laundry is part of taking care of your charge. Just by that statement I can already tell you are one of the nannies the OP is referring to.

OP, I know what you mean, but I don't think I go above and beyond. I just do my job and when asked to do extra stuff, I do it if I have time and it's not troublesome for me (dropping off clothes to cleaners, checking mail, feeding dogs, etc) because I have great employers who don't take advantage of me. I think that's key.

[nannydebsays]

OP, in many situations (especially with nannies who martyr constantly as you described in your post), the employers set low expectations in the initial contract. (Care for kids, do kid laundry, pick up toys, feed kids prepared meals)

Then the employers started adding little tiny tasks to the nanny's day. (Vacuum, run errands, stay late once a week...) but didn't actually ASK nanny if she were willing to do those things, or offer to pay more for the additional work.

If that trend continues, many nannies get aggravated, and start to complain about how horrid their employers are as parents...because the employers have made nanny think they can't manage without her and loaded her down with work she never expected to be doing when she agreed to work for them.

Disrespectful employers = disrespectful and whiny nanny who feels beaten down and therefore tries to make herself feel better by constantly discussing how she goes above and beyond.

OTOH, respectful employers (who don't expect their nanny to constantly be "flexible" about when her work day ends) take the contract seriously, and don't start out with bare minimum duties, figuring to add stuff in each week. They know what they want nanny to do, and nanny knows they won't begin adding stuff to her list.

That nanny may also have complaints (because NO ONE loves their job 100% of the time) but she feels respected and valued. Therefore, she is willing to take the occasional extra duty on, without additional pay, figuring that her willingness to help out will be noted and will benefit her at raise time.

Respectful employers = respectful nanny who doesn't feel the need to flog her importance all over the place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

OP, I take serious issue with the part about employers expecting flexibility. If I tell my nanny her job ends at 6pm, I better be ready to allow her to walk out the door at 6pm. Of course, things happen, but they should be rare, and the nanny should be compensated well for extra time (and choose whether she can take on extra time). Of course she has a life outside of work! And whether it's to take care of her own children, or to live her life and fulfill her responsibilities, it's so selfish to think she needs to put that all aside for my needs and my life.

No, this is something you bring up in the interview and find a good match. Many employers, such as doctors or people with demanding jobs, choose a nanny because they know that they have an unpredictable schedule. If you don't bring up the need for availability and flexibility in the interview then I agree that its terrible to just randomly show up whenever but if this is something you need many nannies are able and willing to accomodate this. They need to be paid for all hours worked but there is no reason for this to be a shakedown of the employer. A nanny who is inconvenienced by this or or can't provide flexibility should turn down this offer.

The problem is that nannies are desperate for jobs and agree to anything upfront then get pissed that the job doesn't meet their fantasy. This attitude that I'm being taken advantage of because I need a job and its not my fault the employers are not offering terms I want is ridiculous.

Part of what you pay a nanny for is to reserve her time. This is why you set a schedule. If you want her available from 8-6, pay her from 8-6. If you want her available until whenever you please, you ought to pay her for it. You make the comparison to your job or that of a doctor or lawyer however it is not comparable. Those types of jobs pay people enough and give good enough benefits to warrant extreme dedication and drop of the hat availability. For the wage/salary many MBs on here desire to pay, you do not get round the clock availability or "above and beyond" dedication. You pay as little as possible for a service, outline a schedule, and desired duties. You can call me a horrible nanny, stupid, lazy or whatever but this is a business transaction. I am not claiming to be Mary Poppins. You pay me the wage we agreed on, and I will be available when we agreed on, and I will perform the duties we agreed on.

Haha, millions of people in the world are asked to stay late. You'll get paid extra if you stay extra. You're delusional if you think you should be paid an extra hour, 52 weeks a year, just because your employers might need you to stay late on a rare occasion.
Again, if you nannies didn't have nanny jobs you'd be working at the local mall making min wage. If you want to reap all the benefits of a real professional then have something to show for it or otherwise, be quiet. Your comment is the reason why nannies typically get a bad rep as being called lazy, unprofessional and entitled. Take your job seriously instead of trying to reel in extra money you didn't work for. Because let's be honest, it won't be good enough for you. You'll still find another reason to complain.

Really all I can get is a min wage mall job.

Damn wish someone should have told me that before I went and spent money on college. Oh but that's ok because I'm probably poor too and have bad credit. Aww man guess graduating hs a year early and starting college was a waste of my time.
Thank you poster for setting me straight!!!! By the way how many degrees do you have??? I have 3 I don't nanny because I can't find other work - I nanny because it's what I love to do.
And my college debt is paid off, so is my house and I just got a new car. Guess if I'm so stupid I can only get a min wage job I must be doing something right.

Come back when your darling little child is serving me at the McDonalds drive thru or bagging my groceries.

I knew nannies would try to explain themselves but c'mon, we all love kids but to choose that over a successful career is not believable and that's why you're getting defensive over something that an internet user said. Lol.

[Anonymous]

nannydebsays wrote:OP, in many situations (especially with nannies who martyr constantly as you described in your post), the employers set low expectations in the initial contract. (Care for kids, do kid laundry, pick up toys, feed kids prepared meals)

Then the employers started adding little tiny tasks to the nanny's day. (Vacuum, run errands, stay late once a week...) but didn't actually ASK nanny if she were willing to do those things, or offer to pay more for the additional work.

If that trend continues, many nannies get aggravated, and start to complain about how horrid their employers are as parents...because the employers have made nanny think they can't manage without her and loaded her down with work she never expected to be doing when she agreed to work for them.

Disrespectful employers = disrespectful and whiny nanny who feels beaten down and therefore tries to make herself feel better by constantly discussing how she goes above and beyond.

OTOH, respectful employers (who don't expect their nanny to constantly be "flexible" about when her work day ends) take the contract seriously, and don't start out with bare minimum duties, figuring to add stuff in each week. They know what they want nanny to do, and nanny knows they won't begin adding stuff to her list.

That nanny may also have complaints (because NO ONE loves their job 100% of the time) but she feels respected and valued. Therefore, she is willing to take the occasional extra duty on, without additional pay, figuring that her willingness to help out will be noted and will benefit her at raise time.

Respectful employers = respectful nanny who doesn't feel the need to flog her importance all over the place.

I understand that but once again, I said OCCASIONALLY flexible. Not constant. And I disagree with employers who add unrelated house-keeping tasks which is why I wrote "I know there are shitty employers as well" at the bottom of the original post.

I'm talking about the entitled complainers who are constantly looking for sympathy on the nanny boards.

I see nannies who write on DCUM who seem like they do in fact get taken advantage of and I give them helpful suggestions. But alot of the complainers are not being taken advantage of but instead, they feel entitled or feel that the duties are 'below them' and that their mere presence should be rewarded and when they don't get a 'thank you' for wiping down a counter, they freak.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I am so sick of people like you posting on these forums. Unloading a dishwasher is considered light housekeeping and so is doing the children's laundry. Are you a little bitter that you aren't raising your own children? Sure as hell sounds like it. I'm so glad my MB doesn't have the mindset of you DC area MB's. I don't go around stating that I go above and beyond, MB and DB both acknowledge how much their children are thriving since I've been caring for them.

Doing children's laundry is a pretty standard nanny responsibility.

(OP, you are hilariously correct.)

Wow, you agreed with yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I noticed most nannies who post on DCUM write that they are awesome nannies who ''go above and beyond'' and boast about how much of an asset they. They then start to write all the things they do that makes them so great and at the same time they're subtly defaming their employers and making them look like bad parents.

+100 Its very amusing. I love how they go on about how they go above and beyond and then two seconds later are going on about how they are entitled to nap, run their own errands, and offended at the idea of doing anything beyond the bare minimum that is spelled out in their contract. They seem to think that their mere presence in showing up to work on time is what constitutes above and beyond. I've never seen a group of people so lacking in self awareness.

My favorite is one is nannydeb. She is so awesome and amazing because she spends 20 minutes a day tidying up after herself. She really is a stellar catch. She isn't smart enough to be able to unload a dishwasher in less than 20 minutes (it takes a lot of brainpower remembering where the plates go, you know) but she still does everyday and counts it as her primary light housekeeping task. Poor taken advantage of nanny, she really deserves a few mini spa days for having to clean up after herself and unload the dishwasher.

I am so sick of people like you posting on these forums. Unloading a dishwasher is considered light housekeeping and so is doing the children's laundry. Are you a little bitter that you aren't raising your own children? Sure as hell sounds like it. I'm so glad my MB doesn't have the mindset of you DC area MB's. I don't go around stating that I go above and beyond, MB and DB both acknowledge how much their children are thriving since I've been caring for them.

Oh gosh, you didn't even comprehend what the above commenter meant when she was talking about nannydeb. Of course unloading the dishwasher and laundry are light housekeeping. But calling yourself an awesome professional nanny who goes above and beyond because you put a few dishes away is almost on the verge of pathetic. And that's what the above comment was saying.

Also, your bragging LOL. Brag to someone who cares because as far as I'm concerned, you're just another delusional DCUM nanny

And you're probably one of those awesome parents that posts threads on the parenting board - help it's snowing out what should my child wear or help I'm alone with my child for 5 mins and I don't know what to do

What would be great is passing a law that you need a license to have kids - after you pass classes.
Tons of stupid people shouldn't breed.

I've never seen a parent post those type of questions. Nice try you little fibber. You seem mad, did I do something to upset you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I am so sick of people like you posting on these forums. Unloading a dishwasher is considered light housekeeping and so is doing the children's laundry. Are you a little bitter that you aren't raising your own children? Sure as hell sounds like it. I'm so glad my MB doesn't have the mindset of you DC area MB's. I don't go around stating that I go above and beyond, MB and DB both acknowledge how much their children are thriving since I've been caring for them.

Doing children's laundry is a pretty standard nanny responsibility.

(OP, you are hilariously correct.)

Wow, you agreed with yourself.

Nope, I'm the OP.. And thank you PP.

[Anonymous]

I'm an awesome nanny with awesome bosses who are also awesome parents. Suck it OP, get a life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I noticed most nannies who post on DCUM write that they are awesome nannies who ''go above and beyond'' and boast about how much of an asset they. They then start to write all the things they do that makes them so great and at the same time they're subtly defaming their employers and making them look like bad parents.

+100 Its very amusing. I love how they go on about how they go above and beyond and then two seconds later are going on about how they are entitled to nap, run their own errands, and offended at the idea of doing anything beyond the bare minimum that is spelled out in their contract. They seem to think that their mere presence in showing up to work on time is what constitutes above and beyond. I've never seen a group of people so lacking in self awareness.

My favorite is one is nannydeb. She is so awesome and amazing because she spends 20 minutes a day tidying up after herself. She really is a stellar catch. She isn't smart enough to be able to unload a dishwasher in less than 20 minutes (it takes a lot of brainpower remembering where the plates go, you know) but she still does everyday and counts it as her primary light housekeeping task. Poor taken advantage of nanny, she really deserves a few mini spa days for having to clean up after herself and unload the dishwasher.

I am so sick of people like you posting on these forums. Unloading a dishwasher is considered light housekeeping and so is doing the children's laundry. Are you a little bitter that you aren't raising your own children? Sure as hell sounds like it. I'm so glad my MB doesn't have the mindset of you DC area MB's. I don't go around stating that I go above and beyond, MB and DB both acknowledge how much their children are thriving since I've been caring for them.

You already responded to that poster already, why are you responding again? Noone cares. You don't seem to confident, infact you seem quite bitter yourself. Lol. You obviously missed PP's point completely when he was talking about the laundry and dishwasher. If you can't comprehend then don't bother coming back a second time with the same ol' comment. *yawn*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm an awesome nanny with awesome bosses who are also awesome parents. Suck it OP, get a life.

Everyone thinks there awesome but to me, you're just another internet nobody who tries to convince themselves that they're awesome.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I am so sick of people like you posting on these forums. Unloading a dishwasher is considered light housekeeping and so is doing the children's laundry. Are you a little bitter that you aren't raising your own children? Sure as hell sounds like it. I'm so glad my MB doesn't have the mindset of you DC area MB's. I don't go around stating that I go above and beyond, MB and DB both acknowledge how much their children are thriving since I've been caring for them.


Doing children's laundry is a pretty standard nanny responsibility.

(OP, you are hilariously correct.)


Wow, you agreed with yourself.


Nope, I'm the OP.. And thank you PP.

You're welcome!