Is it okay for a teacher to kiss a student on the face?

[Anonymous]

Pre-school teacher here. There are so many times when I would love to smother these adorable little ones in kisses, but I do not because that boundary is so important. I hug them, swing them around, make them feel loved and occasionally kiss the top of their head from behind when they’re so freaking cute I forget they’re not my own. But an absolute NO to encountering a child in the hallway and kissing their face. Pretty much never ok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does this cross a boundary or is it okay under certain circumstances?

What’s your point?

[Anonymous]

I’m thinking that it would never occur a male teacher to be “affectionate” with kids. So many ways to show them that you care w/o physical embraces as such. High fives should do the trick.

[Anonymous]

OP, it not ok, and even if other people thought it was, if YOU do not, then its not ok. Period.

But, as you can see, most people find it weird.

The reasons for why its happening may not be nefarious. But the reasons DO NOT MATTER because it IS inappropriate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, it not ok, and even if other people thought it was, if YOU do not, then its not ok. Period.

But, as you can see, most people find it weird.

The reasons for why its happening may not be nefarious. But the reasons DO NOT MATTER because it IS inappropriate.

No, it's not objectively so. That's just in your head, and your subjective opinion, don't treat it like fact or impose it on others.

Our culture is so paranoid to the point that even a normal/natural minor display of affection from the teacher to child is treated like some sort of affront. If my kid hugs a teacher, I want the teacher to hug them back, not sit there cold making my kid feel like "hey, this is weird" when it's not. If my kid has a rough day or a struggle and is crying and the teacher is trying to support them and cheer them up, of course I want them at some point to put their arm around their shoulder or give them a peck on the head, just like any other friend or caregiver would do. I DON'T want the teacher sending the message that normal non-sexual affection is somehow weird or bad by withholding it.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely not, ever, ever, ever. I was an educator for 15 years and I comforted kids who were going through lots- death in their family, other forms of trauma. I would side hug but never ever kissed a kid. It’s really bad. As an administrator I would want to know immediately, would warn them and move to terminate if it continued. It is so horribly out of bounds.

[Anonymous]

When I was a kid, a teacher came up and hugged me from behind in the lunch line. I froze. I didn't even know her, and felt like it was a huge imposition.

"Well, you're not very flexible!" she said.

So I felt bad for hating the hug and I felt bad for not being flexible.

Don't do this. Please.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely not, ever, ever, ever. I was an educator for 15 years and I comforted kids who were going through lots- death in their family, other forms of trauma. I would side hug but never ever kissed a kid. It’s really bad. As an administrator I would want to know immediately, would warn them and move to terminate if it continued. It is so horribly out of bounds.

I don't want my kid being educated by someone who is going to teach them that normal, situation-appropriate affection from a caregiver is "really bad" and "horribly out of bounds". Yeesh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely not, ever, ever, ever. I was an educator for 15 years and I comforted kids who were going through lots- death in their family, other forms of trauma. I would side hug but never ever kissed a kid. It’s really bad. As an administrator I would want to know immediately, would warn them and move to terminate if it continued. It is so horribly out of bounds.

I don't want my kid being educated by someone who is going to teach them that normal, situation-appropriate affection from a caregiver is "really bad" and "horribly out of bounds". Yeesh.

Kissing a student on the face when you’re alone with them is NOT situation-appropriate as most of the people on this thread have stated. What is wrong with you???

[Anonymous]

I went on a trip with one of my hs teachers and other students. When I met him at the airport, he greeted us with pecks on both cheeks. I understood the context (he was not American) and that the kisses were a greeting, but I still did not feel comfortable with it.

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand why this post from 2013(!) keeps getting revived!

That said, my first thought was - how are they kissing now anyway? Aren’t they wearing a mask?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely not, ever, ever, ever. I was an educator for 15 years and I comforted kids who were going through lots- death in their family, other forms of trauma. I would side hug but never ever kissed a kid. It’s really bad. As an administrator I would want to know immediately, would warn them and move to terminate if it continued. It is so horribly out of bounds.

I don't want my kid being educated by someone who is going to teach them that normal, situation-appropriate affection from a caregiver is "really bad" and "horribly out of bounds". Yeesh.

Kissing a student on the face when you’re alone with them is NOT situation-appropriate as most of the people on this thread have stated. What is wrong with you???

1) Who said anything about being alone?
2) Is the forehead part of the face?
3) I was responding to PP who said that even if comforting a kid who went through a death in their family or other form of trauma, that even in that situation a generic "kiss" is "really bad" and "horribly out of bounds" and even grounds for termination. They won't even give them a proper hug. If that's not disturbing to you, what is wrong with you???

[Anonymous]

man what am i reading

[Anonymous]

i think im the only one replying in 2024😂😁

[Anonymous]

It's absolutely inappropriate if the kid is uncomfortable.

Then it's also inappropriate if anyone is unsure if the kid is uncomfortable.

The lack of clear understanding leads to either harmful overcorrections or harmful liberties.