Why rich people don't feel rich

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel rich. Damn rich! And we "only" make $200k. As several PPs have said, it's all about choices. Why do I feel rich? Countless reasons, but to name a few:

Since we got married 7 years ago, we have made the choice to live on less than one salary and save. Even when our combined salary was much lower than it is now. This made the year I took off after our twins were born pretty painless. We didn't save much that year, but we didn't burn through savings. And we fully recognize that many don't have that choice, but I would argue that's not the case for most of DCUM, certainly most of the posters on this thread. We chose to start in a small condo, take that equity and by a small house, and then take that equity and by a slightly larger house in a close in area with better schools.

Assuming nothing catastrophic happens, we are on track to have $1 mill in assets (home equity, savings, retirement) by the time we are 40 - that's 3 years from now.

Even though we suffered through 3 years of IF tx, we were spared from making some of the very difficult choices that some couples must make because we had the cash to pay for all the meds and treatment. No insurance. Spent close to $80k during that time.

We enjoy nice vacations every year, but instead of spending $7K to go to Beaches, we spend $3,500 and rent a beach front condo.

We'd rather pay for our kids' college tuition than private elementary school. If we sacrificed savings, we could stretch and do both, though probably not top tier private, but choose not to.


In 11 years, my grad school student loans will be paid off!!

Most importantly, there is nothing we need that we can't afford, and not much we want that we deny ourselves.

Yeah, we are filthy, stinkin' rich and have NOTHING to complain about.

Well, you sound pretty middle class to me. You don't sound rich at all, much less filthy stinkin' rich. And you make twice what I do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Well, you sound pretty middle class to me. You don't sound rich at all, much less filthy stinkin' rich. And you make twice what I do.

See, you missed my point, entirely. I FEEL rich, because we have more than we need. Yet people who make twice what WE DO, complain about how squeezed they are because of the choices they make.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Well, you sound pretty middle class to me. You don't sound rich at all, much less filthy stinkin' rich. And you make twice what I do.

See, you missed my point, entirely. I FEEL rich, because we have more than we need. Yet people who make twice what WE DO, complain about how squeezed they are because of the choices they make.

I don't see how you have more than you need. It sounds to me like you have just enough. And its been a hard road to get there. But kudos to you for seeing the glass as half full.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Well, you sound pretty middle class to me. You don't sound rich at all, much less filthy stinkin' rich. And you make twice what I do.

See, you missed my point, entirely. I FEEL rich, because we have more than we need. Yet people who make twice what WE DO, complain about how squeezed they are because of the choices they make.

I don't see how you have more than you need. It sounds to me like you have just enough. And its been a hard road to get there. But kudos to you for seeing the glass as half full.

16:03, please ignore 16:51 and his/her previous posts. S/he seems to be very bothered that you live a life you're happy with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Well, you sound pretty middle class to me. You don't sound rich at all, much less filthy stinkin' rich. And you make twice what I do.

See, you missed my point, entirely. I FEEL rich, because we have more than we need. Yet people who make twice what WE DO, complain about how squeezed they are because of the choices they make.

I don't see how you have more than you need. It sounds to me like you have just enough. And its been a hard road to get there. But kudos to you for seeing the glass as half full.

16:03, please ignore 16:51 and his/her previous posts. S/he seems to be very bothered that you live a life you're happy with.

I know! Sad, isn't it, that some people are can never be happy, no matter what they have? The PP obviously has a very warped perspective since s/he is projecting his/her own perceived 'hard road' on me, when it couldn't be further from the truth. Life has always come pretty easily for me and Dh. Infertility aside, we don't feel that we've had to work to hard to be where we are. Sure, we could work more and make more $$, but for what? To be jaded like many on this thread? Not worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
16:03, please ignore 16:51 and his/her previous posts. S/he seems to be very bothered that you live a life you're happy with.

Actually, I said "kudos to you for seeing the glass as half full".

But that has absolutely nothing to do with how much money you make. It seems you're the kind of person who would be happy with life if you made 30% of what you make now. Which is a virtue. Thank goodness, the world is full of people who are happy with what they have, as long as they are warm, dry, healthy and fed. But that is separate and apart form the reality of what your standard of living is. That's my point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
16:03, please ignore 16:51 and his/her previous posts. S/he seems to be very bothered that you live a life you're happy with.

Actually, I said "kudos to you for seeing the glass as half full".

But that has absolutely nothing to do with how much money you make. It seems you're the kind of person who would be happy with life if you made 30% of what you make now. Which is a virtue. Thank goodness, the world is full of people who are happy with what they have, as long as they are warm, dry, healthy and fed. But that is separate and apart form the reality of what your standard of living is. That's my point.

I'll give you the benefit of the doubt that you are sincere, but I encourage you to re-read your posts. They reek of a condescending tone.

[Anonymous]

17:25 is right.

16:51, your "kudos" didn't sound very friendly, and neither did your other posts.

[Anonymous]

What does it mean to be 'rich'? It really is a good question. Does it simply mean that you have more than you need? And how does one define 'need'? Does a family of 4 'need' a 2 bedroom apt or 3? Or more? What do you 'need' to eat? Enough calories or is quality part of the equation? In term of education, what does a child 'need'? Is 'need' defined by the minimum or the adequate? What is the standard? And far above either do you need to be to called 'rich'? Its really much less about a number and much more what your needs are and how much more than you need you have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Just because you decide to spend all of your high income doesn't mean you're not rich.

Just pointing out that someone with a high income may have been rich before they spent their money but once they spent it it is gone whether it was a good or bad choice and they are no longer rich.

Oh please - the person who makes $1 million each year, and has a fancy home, another vacation house, luxury cars, designer clothes, private schools, etc., but doesn't have anything left over after the bills aren't paid isn't rich? Come on. They're idiots, but they're rich idiots.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
16:03, please ignore 16:51 and his/her previous posts. S/he seems to be very bothered that you live a life you're happy with.

Actually, I said "kudos to you for seeing the glass as half full".

But that has absolutely nothing to do with how much money you make. It seems you're the kind of person who would be happy with life if you made 30% of what you make now. Which is a virtue. Thank goodness, the world is full of people who are happy with what they have, as long as they are warm, dry, healthy and fed. But that is separate and apart form the reality of what your standard of living is. That's my point.

The "reality of what [her] standard of living" appears to be that she has a lot of assets. Is conspicuous consumption the only way to be rich??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
16:03, please ignore 16:51 and his/her previous posts. S/he seems to be very bothered that you live a life you're happy with.

Actually, I said "kudos to you for seeing the glass as half full".

But that has absolutely nothing to do with how much money you make. It seems you're the kind of person who would be happy with life if you made 30% of what you make now. Which is a virtue. Thank goodness, the world is full of people who are happy with what they have, as long as they are warm, dry, healthy and fed. But that is separate and apart form the reality of what your standard of living is. That's my point.

The "reality of what [her] standard of living" appears to be that she has a lot of assets. Is conspicuous consumption the only way to be rich??

She only seems to have a lot of assets b/c she is paying her own way through life. She is not expecting someone else to pay for her child's higher education. Her child's current education is adequate b/c she saved to buy a house in a place where that is so b/c a quality education in our society depends on where you live (this should not be true, but it is). She is planning to pay for most of her own retirement. She can provide for her family's needs. This should be the basic expectation for everyone in a society, not the domain of the 'rich'.

[Anonymous]

Oh god, get your head out of your ass, 18:45. Are you such a needless pessimist in person as well?

[Anonymous]

In this day and age, I think people count as 'rich' if they are able to have an emergency fund and save for college and retirement. Most people are one paycheck away from catastrophe and if you're not in that boat, you're in good shape.

The reason 'rich' is so hard to define these days is because so many people are spending everything they have (and more), so their quality of life and material possessions are in many cases much higher than people who are being more responsible with their money.

We ought to just abolish credit cards and see who's 'rich' then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In this day and age, I think people count as 'rich' if they are able to have an emergency fund and save for college and retirement. Most people are one paycheck away from catastrophe and if you're not in that boat, you're in good shape.

The reason 'rich' is so hard to define these days is because so many people are spending everything they have (and more), so their quality of life and material possessions are in many cases much higher than people who are being more responsible with their money.

We ought to just abolish credit cards and see who's 'rich' then.

I don't know. I think eventually, so many people will have a catastrophe that it will bring down our entire economy again. And/or they will age and become disabled an unable to work and all us folks who are being responsible will end up, yet again, having our hard earned saving sucked away b/c of the irresponsibility and poor choices of others. I don't know, but I can lots of folks looking at those choices and saying its not worth it.