+1 That's exactly the way read it. It was all about the PP and her DD, not about celebrating a friend's wedding. It's clear the PP pleasure was diminished because her DD wasn't there. That's on the PP, not the bride and groom. |
Thanks for clarifying, it seems you don't have any family bonds so your opinion is a fringe one not mine. OP's DH's family is both local and close enough to be invited to a very small and intimate wedding. You also seem to have a weird take on 12 year olds, you consider them to have the comprehension and importance of a pet. Every single kid i have met from first grade on up has been ecstatic about an upcoming wedding of someone they have a relationship with. Yes they are hurt when mom's bff, that they consider an aunt, excludes them (as someone mentioned upthread). So cut to the chase and say these relationships are not important to me, because that's the message you are sending. |
Nope. I had a kid-free wedding. No kids under age 12. My first cousin was 12 and attended. Friends with kids? No way. |
I was a bride once. Kids are not a cute delight. |
My mother’s aunt got so drunk she threw up under her groups table at my wedding.
Adults can sometimes not be a cute delight either. I think we only had one young kid at our wedding (the few others were teens) and they crashed out at 9pm on a chair cover on the floor but otherwise were way less disruptive than the vomit-aunt. OP, all that said it’s your wedding. People will get over it eventually. As parents it’s might be nice to have an adults night he out and hire a sitter (and maybe you offer to split to keep the peace if it’s within your budget?). Or not. It’s your deal. |
This is a really excellent post. Nicely stated, pp. |
You say Asian cultures do fine at weddings, but I was at a wedding two weeks ago where most of the guests were Asian and the kids were a problem. The older ones were fine, but the toddlers were allowed to run wild and touch and play with everything (like the cake and the champagne wall). They knocked over several decor items and one peed in an artificial flower arrangement. True, the parents were not upset, but I'm sure the rental companies whose items were damaged felt differently. |
It’s the point of the institution of marriage. Now it may not be the sole point of individual couples getting married but it is the reason why the institution of marriage exists. |
Clearly she isn’t being raised properly. Kids should be forced to sit and have conversations with adults every now and then so that they can learn to interact with other members of society. |
Both my husband and I are Indian and in our culture no one would dream of having a "no kids" wedding. However, after living in the US for several years and having attended several no kid weddings, we have come to appreciate such events.
The first time we were invited to a no kids wedding, I'll admit I was perplexed. But I got over it. We had a great time at that wedding - it was a fancy, intimate affair at a winery, and we enjoyed a night away from our then 2 - year old. After that we didn't think twice about such invitations. All this to say, people have strong feelings, but in my experience, they get over it. Do what works for you, and don't sway in the wind based on others' opinions, preferences and expectations. If some people decide to hold a grudge, shruggy. That's their problem. |
<yawn> 🥱 |
That’s utterly ridiculous. By extension, you’re basically saying that kids are invited to anything their parents are, which any reasonable person knows is not true. |
No, you don't. The people with children. Ha two choices: get a sitter or do not attend. |