Why do young, single women sleep with married men?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just loved everything about him (attractiveness, worldliness, money, etc.) and I wanted to have his baby.

Did you end up having his baby?

[Anonymous]

OP, men and women most often sleep together, because they are attracted to each other sexually. Wives who have been cheated on rationalize this by assigning all kinds of emotional reasons for that, but sooner or later they have to face the fact that their husbands simply want to fuck other people. It's not that complicated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, men and women most often sleep together, because they are attracted to each other sexually. Wives who have been cheated on rationalize this by assigning all kinds of emotional reasons for that, but sooner or later they have to face the fact that their husbands simply want to fuck other people. It's not that complicated.

You must be such a joy to be married to.

[Anonymous]

Because they can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a friend who did this. She was extremely insecure with low self-esteem. It made her feel more attractive and desirable if she could "get" someone who "belonged" to someone else. It was pathetic all the way around.

I was going to write exactly this. My friend thought it was even harder to get married men, so she must be "that good."

Another vote for this. I had a friend like this too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, men and women most often sleep together, because they are attracted to each other sexually. Wives who have been cheated on rationalize this by assigning all kinds of emotional reasons for that, but sooner or later they have to face the fact that their husbands simply want to fuck other people. It's not that complicated.

I think the cheaters are more likely to rationalize the why, to come up with "emotional reasons" why their cheating is somehow acceptable.

You see it all over this board - "Your DH must have been unhappy." But truly, it's not about their emotional needs. It's about having sex with someone new.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I only sleep with married men. I'm 48 and also married and it makes things less complicated. I have no interest in anything other than sex.

How and where to I meet a woman like you. I need sex too. 49 y.o. make in sexless marriage but not wanting divorce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And the other side of this. Why do older married men cheat?

I don't think there is just one answer to that. Some look up and realize the end of their sexual lives is nearly over, and choose to seek the excitement of a new partner or new infatuation. Some are in sexless marriages and cheat for a combo of that and the above reason. Other like the thrill of the chase, but have good sex lives at home. The possibilities are endless.


I slept with a married man. When I met him, I needed the attention. My father and I were always very close, but he stopped talking to me for a few months. I didn't think I was possible to start having daddy issues in my mid 30s, when it was never a problem before. That's when I started talking to him, and he recognized it quickly.

I resolved the issues with my dad, but still see the guy a few times a year. While our personalities conflict enough to prevent us from being a couple, we are a sexual match. The sex calls me back on occasion. He knows I don't want more. I know he doesn't want more. It's just mind-blowing sex and a friendship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And the other side of this. Why do older married men cheat?

I don't think there is just one answer to that. Some look up and realize the end of their sexual lives is nearly over, and choose to seek the excitement of a new partner or new infatuation. Some are in sexless marriages and cheat for a combo of that and the above reason. Other like the thrill of the chase, but have good sex lives at home. The possibilities are endless.


I slept with a married man. When I met him, I needed the attention. My father and I were always very close, but he stopped talking to me for a few months. I didn't think I was possible to start having daddy issues in my mid 30s, when it was never a problem before. That's when I started talking to him, and he recognized it quickly.

I resolved the issues with my dad, but still see the guy a few times a year. While our personalities conflict enough to prevent us from being a couple, we are a sexual match. The sex calls me back on occasion. He knows I don't want more. I know he doesn't want more. It's just mind-blowing sex and a friendship.

If there's no emotional connection what makes the sex so good?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, men and women most often sleep together, because they are attracted to each other sexually. Wives who have been cheated on rationalize this by assigning all kinds of emotional reasons for that, but sooner or later they have to face the fact that their husbands simply want to fuck other people. It's not that complicated.

I think the cheaters are more likely to rationalize the why, to come up with "emotional reasons" why their cheating is somehow acceptable.

You see it all over this board - "Your DH must have been unhappy." But truly, it's not about their emotional needs. It's about having sex with someone new.

I think each affair is different. Some are just for sex, some are more. My husband had an affair with a woman who told him how amazing he was, how handsome he was, how smart, great, etc. That was a major motivator, I think. Having someone basically idolize you makes you feel good, and I think that was more important to him than the sexual aspect from what I can tell.

[Anonymous]

I did it all for the nookie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And the other side of this. Why do older married men cheat?

I don't think there is just one answer to that. Some look up and realize the end of their sexual lives is nearly over, and choose to seek the excitement of a new partner or new infatuation. Some are in sexless marriages and cheat for a combo of that and the above reason. Other like the thrill of the chase, but have good sex lives at home. The possibilities are endless.


I slept with a married man. When I met him, I needed the attention. My father and I were always very close, but he stopped talking to me for a few months. I didn't think I was possible to start having daddy issues in my mid 30s, when it was never a problem before. That's when I started talking to him, and he recognized it quickly.

I resolved the issues with my dad, but still see the guy a few times a year. While our personalities conflict enough to prevent us from being a couple, we are a sexual match. The sex calls me back on occasion. He knows I don't want more. I know he doesn't want more. It's just mind-blowing sex and a friendship.

If there's no emotional connection what makes the sex so good?

Yup, you see all over these boards how marriages are sexless because "women need an emotional connection" and yet, here we have evidence to the contrary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There could be various reasons since each & every affair is unique.

Some girls like to have fun when they are young, and sleeping w/married men who are attached is the perfect opportunity to have their "fun," w/out worrying about the guy falling for them.

Others may have been cheated on in the past + may like being on the other end of things.

Others may just like men who are attached, it seems kind of hot to them & they may like the idea of naughty/secretive sex.

+1

I think intimacy issues (as another poster mentioned) are also a factor.

Also, married men are not on the singles dating market. So they feel lucky when they find an attractive affair partner instead of juggling 9000 women. They give a lot of attention. They can also be very romantic in the same way 2 strangers meeting at a vacation hotspot can be fast-track romantic - everyone knows it's not going anywhere, so it's "safe" to jump into the deep end intimacy wise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because they can, and want to? Who cares. They're not married. The man's violation of his marriage is his own problem. If he didn't cheat with woman A, he would with woman B.

+1000
Every friend I had in my 20's who slept with married men blamed the wife, because every scumbag husband told a tale of frigid, sexless marriages to nagging witches. I couldn't believe how many women fell for this. And yet these same women expected to have faithful marriages some day. Perplexing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because they can, and want to? Who cares. They're not married. The man's violation of his marriage is his own problem. If he didn't cheat with woman A, he would with woman B.

+1000
Every friend I had in my 20's who slept with married men blamed the wife, because every scumbag husband told a tale of frigid, sexless marriages to nagging witches. I couldn't believe how many women fell for this. And yet these same women expected to have faithful marriages some day. Perplexing.

+1000
Oh the naïveté.