Wife is not a good sham

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OPs wife is a pampered princess. Lives in a 2.7m home, gets weekly massages, and has childcare for most of the week. I see posters saying she needs time to herself, but when does OP get time to himself? He works all day and maybe gets a couple of measly hours to himself if he isn’t working or with his wife. He gives her time off on the weekends but it doesn’t sound like he ever gets any personal time to himself. I stand by that she’s lazy, entitled, and a bad mother/wife.

ok well, OP can divorce her and give her 50% of the assets and alimony. win win!

OP here. We have a prenup. She won’t get 50% or anywhere close to it if we ever divorced ( which we won’t).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OPs wife is a pampered princess. Lives in a 2.7m home, gets weekly massages, and has childcare for most of the week. I see posters saying she needs time to herself, but when does OP get time to himself? He works all day and maybe gets a couple of measly hours to himself if he isn’t working or with his wife. He gives her time off on the weekends but it doesn’t sound like he ever gets any personal time to himself. I stand by that she’s lazy, entitled, and a bad mother/wife.

ok well, OP can divorce her and give her 50% of the assets and alimony. win win!

OP here. We have a prenup. She won’t get 50% or anywhere close to it if we ever divorced ( which we won’t).

Ok now I am pretty sure you are a troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She does sound pathetically low energy and like it's not a benefit for anyone to have her home doing so little with so much expensive help. She may be a good enough mom (though kinda lazy) but she's a shitty housewife so send her back to work I guess, the current arrangement isn't working. It's a personality type, nothing truly wrong with it but it's just low capacity. I was in her spot with young kids and it felt like a vacation.

You thought being home with a baby and toddler was a vacation???

I’m suddenly feeling very grateful for DH. I can’t believe the people calling a tired SAHM lazy. DH earns a lot, helps with our kids and lets me outsource as much as I want.

Yeah that’s what a good guy does. I cannot get over how unsympathetic, petty and controlling OP is, towards the woman who gave birth to his baby 6 months ago.

She gave birth 6 months ago. Who cares? Pregnancy isn’t some type of disability. She’s still able to be a fully functioning adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OPs wife is a pampered princess. Lives in a 2.7m home, gets weekly massages, and has childcare for most of the week. I see posters saying she needs time to herself, but when does OP get time to himself? He works all day and maybe gets a couple of measly hours to himself if he isn’t working or with his wife. He gives her time off on the weekends but it doesn’t sound like he ever gets any personal time to himself. I stand by that she’s lazy, entitled, and a bad mother/wife.

ok well, OP can divorce her and give her 50% of the assets and alimony. win win!

This is such a crazy way to look at marriage; it is possible the wife isn’t trying to screw her husband over and would like to feel like she is contributing to the household…right?

This is why men don't want to get married. You end up with a lazy do nothing wife and lose half your stuff for the pleasure while she sat at home binging Netflix. Yeah...sounds great.

+1. Men no longer want to get married and so can blame them. Men do the worst in divorces.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She does sound pathetically low energy and like it's not a benefit for anyone to have her home doing so little with so much expensive help. She may be a good enough mom (though kinda lazy) but she's a shitty housewife so send her back to work I guess, the current arrangement isn't working. It's a personality type, nothing truly wrong with it but it's just low capacity. I was in her spot with young kids and it felt like a vacation.

You thought being home with a baby and toddler was a vacation???

I’m suddenly feeling very grateful for DH. I can’t believe the people calling a tired SAHM lazy. DH earns a lot, helps with our kids and lets me outsource as much as I want.

You sound lazy too. OPs wife has a nanny, daycare, and spends very little time with her kids, all while OP works more than FT, does most of the cooking and cleaning, and cares for the kids almost an equal amount as his wife. All while barely sleeping but his lazy wife sleeps well all night and naps while a nanny cares for her kid. She’s lazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:it shocks me as a full time working mom that op is being called a troll. are there really people out here deciding to stay home with help who don't think they have a hustle of their own to do? wtf? marriage you are a team where you both do annoying stuff. not where one person does annoying stuff. jfc.

it shocks you because you cannot read. she’s doind a ton. she’s just not the stepford wife to which OP believes he is entitled.

OP here. I don’t want a stepford wife and I never said I was entitled to one. I do, however, expect my spouse to pull their weight. We have a nanny come 5 days a week, one kid in daycare 3 days a week, and a housekeeper that comes twice a month. On the weekends, I let her sleep in and Saturday is her to go get a massage ( she’s gets them weekly), get a mani/pedi, see friends, etc. She has ample time to get things done.

I feel like I provide my wife with a very nice lifestyle. She has a very involved husband/father, a very nice expensive home, and she gets anything she wants from me.

You still seem to think your wife works for you. How much do you think you owe her for giving birth to and breastfeeding your two children? It will take you a while to work off that debt.

OP doesn’t think she owes him anything. Her choice was to stay at home and she assume those responsibilities that come with it. If OP decided to stop supporting his wife, wouldn’t she leave him? I doubt she would decide to pick up the slack and support her entire family.

OP was quite clear - bearing the children, nursing them, taking care of them, cleaning, was not enough. She needed to also be keeping the house tidy at all times and serving a homemade dinner every night at 6. After all she gets 3 hours off on Saturdays!

OP said she doesn’t clean or cook. His wife gets 3 days a week from 8-2pm to herself, the evenings, and Saturdays. That’s more time off than most parents get. His wife is lazy.

Oh yeah you didn't read the thread. Op has changed his story several times.

She does cook and clean.

Op resents that he has to clean up after bedtime when he's at home and he wants a home cooked meal by her every night by 6 pm

OP never changed his story. He added onto his original post and defended his wife when people called her lazy and a bad mother.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She does sound pathetically low energy and like it's not a benefit for anyone to have her home doing so little with so much expensive help. She may be a good enough mom (though kinda lazy) but she's a shitty housewife so send her back to work I guess, the current arrangement isn't working. It's a personality type, nothing truly wrong with it but it's just low capacity. I was in her spot with young kids and it felt like a vacation.

You thought being home with a baby and toddler was a vacation???

I’m suddenly feeling very grateful for DH. I can’t believe the people calling a tired SAHM lazy. DH earns a lot, helps with our kids and lets me outsource as much as I want.

Yeah that’s what a good guy does. I cannot get over how unsympathetic, petty and controlling OP is, towards the woman who gave birth to his baby 6 months ago.

What does a good woman do? OP has to do everything as a man, but his wife gets to live a pampered life because she’s a woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OPs wife is a pampered princess. Lives in a 2.7m home, gets weekly massages, and has childcare for most of the week. I see posters saying she needs time to herself, but when does OP get time to himself? He works all day and maybe gets a couple of measly hours to himself if he isn’t working or with his wife. He gives her time off on the weekends but it doesn’t sound like he ever gets any personal time to himself. I stand by that she’s lazy, entitled, and a bad mother/wife.

ok well, OP can divorce her and give her 50% of the assets and alimony. win win!

OP here. We have a prenup. She won’t get 50% or anywhere close to it if we ever divorced ( which we won’t).

Ok now I am pretty sure you are a troll.

OP here. No. Prenup is the way to go. My dad had his own business and my mom signed a prenup. Most of my friends have prenups. We decided to have a prenup because we both had assets that we wanted to protect if ever there is a divorce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OPs wife is a pampered princess. Lives in a 2.7m home, gets weekly massages, and has childcare for most of the week. I see posters saying she needs time to herself, but when does OP get time to himself? He works all day and maybe gets a couple of measly hours to himself if he isn’t working or with his wife. He gives her time off on the weekends but it doesn’t sound like he ever gets any personal time to himself. I stand by that she’s lazy, entitled, and a bad mother/wife.

ok well, OP can divorce her and give her 50% of the assets and alimony. win win!

OP here. We have a prenup. She won’t get 50% or anywhere close to it if we ever divorced ( which we won’t).

Ok now I am pretty sure you are a troll.

This was your tipping point!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:it shocks me as a full time working mom that op is being called a troll. are there really people out here deciding to stay home with help who don't think they have a hustle of their own to do? wtf? marriage you are a team where you both do annoying stuff. not where one person does annoying stuff. jfc.

it shocks you because you cannot read. she’s doind a ton. she’s just not the stepford wife to which OP believes he is entitled.

OP here. I don’t want a stepford wife and I never said I was entitled to one. I do, however, expect my spouse to pull their weight. We have a nanny come 5 days a week, one kid in daycare 3 days a week, and a housekeeper that comes twice a month. On the weekends, I let her sleep in and Saturday is her to go get a massage ( she’s gets them weekly), get a mani/pedi, see friends, etc. She has ample time to get things done.

I feel like I provide my wife with a very nice lifestyle. She has a very involved husband/father, a very nice expensive home, and she gets anything she wants from me.

You still seem to think your wife works for you. How much do you think you owe her for giving birth to and breastfeeding your two children? It will take you a while to work off that debt.

OP doesn’t think she owes him anything. Her choice was to stay at home and she assume those responsibilities that come with it. If OP decided to stop supporting his wife, wouldn’t she leave him? I doubt she would decide to pick up the slack and support her entire family.

OP was quite clear - bearing the children, nursing them, taking care of them, cleaning, was not enough. She needed to also be keeping the house tidy at all times and serving a homemade dinner every night at 6. After all she gets 3 hours off on Saturdays!

OP said she doesn’t clean or cook. His wife gets 3 days a week from 8-2pm to herself, the evenings, and Saturdays. That’s more time off than most parents get. His wife is lazy.

Oh yeah you didn't read the thread. Op has changed his story several times.

She does cook and clean.

Op resents that he has to clean up after bedtime when he's at home and he wants a home cooked meal by her every night by 6 pm

OP never changed his story. He added onto his original post and defended his wife when people called her lazy and a bad mother.

Do you really want to defend a misogynistic incells troll?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She does sound pathetically low energy and like it's not a benefit for anyone to have her home doing so little with so much expensive help. She may be a good enough mom (though kinda lazy) but she's a shitty housewife so send her back to work I guess, the current arrangement isn't working. It's a personality type, nothing truly wrong with it but it's just low capacity. I was in her spot with young kids and it felt like a vacation.

You thought being home with a baby and toddler was a vacation???

I’m suddenly feeling very grateful for DH. I can’t believe the people calling a tired SAHM lazy. DH earns a lot, helps with our kids and lets me outsource as much as I want.

You sound lazy too. OPs wife has a nanny, daycare, and spends very little time with her kids, all while OP works more than FT, does most of the cooking and cleaning, and cares for the kids almost an equal amount as his wife. All while barely sleeping but his lazy wife sleeps well all night and naps while a nanny cares for her kid. She’s lazy.

In what world does OP’s wife spend very little time with her kids? These people on here are the ones who are nuts.

My kids are all school aged now but still remember those baby and toddler days and they were brutal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She does sound pathetically low energy and like it's not a benefit for anyone to have her home doing so little with so much expensive help. She may be a good enough mom (though kinda lazy) but she's a shitty housewife so send her back to work I guess, the current arrangement isn't working. It's a personality type, nothing truly wrong with it but it's just low capacity. I was in her spot with young kids and it felt like a vacation.

You thought being home with a baby and toddler was a vacation???

I’m suddenly feeling very grateful for DH. I can’t believe the people calling a tired SAHM lazy. DH earns a lot, helps with our kids and lets me outsource as much as I want.

I've always had a really difficult, 80+ hour a week brutal career, so yes, being home with kids was easy. I considered having a third to get another 6+ months maternity leave just to get a break but decided against it for longer term considerations.