Age gap or no?

[Anonymous]

DD17 is taking a couple of dual enrollment classes at our state university. She’s made a few college-age friends, thank god, and, last week, was asked out by someone in one of her classes. She is a junior and the kid who asked her out is a college sophomore. Is this too much of an age/maturity gap? She hasn’t gone out with him yet.

[Anonymous]

Yes. He's likely 20 years old.

[Anonymous]

So she's 17 and he's 19 or 20? Eh, it's fine. She should tell him though that she's in 11th grade.

And I told my daughters (and remind them of this) that older boys sometimes go for younger girls because younger girls don't have the maturity yet to realize how shit the guy treats them, while older girls do and won't put up with it. So proceed with caution.

[Anonymous]

I had a guy ask me out summer after 11th grade and he was summer after sophomore year of college. I said yes (didn’t tell my parents how old he was), we made plans, and then he called me the next day and said he was so sorry but his buddy told me I was still in high school and that didn’t seem right. I was sad at the time but have always thought that was pretty cool looking back on it. I wouldn’t love it but I’m not sure how to handle. My kids are a bit younger.

[Anonymous]

No. If she were a 17 year old senior I must feel differently. She's a17 year old junior she doesn't need college friends or a 20 year old boyfriend.

She told you about it she wants an easy out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a guy ask me out summer after 11th grade and he was summer after sophomore year of college. I said yes (didn’t tell my parents how old he was), we made plans, and then he called me the next day and said he was so sorry but his buddy told me I was still in high school and that didn’t seem right. I was sad at the time but have always thought that was pretty cool looking back on it. I wouldn’t love it but I’m not sure how to handle. My kids are a bit younger.

That was a good guy. Especially since I'm assuming this was 20+ years ago and the culture was more excusing of these types of things.

[Anonymous]

That is a nope in my house. An adult college student should be dating people who are legal adults, of which there are plenty at college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD17 is taking a couple of dual enrollment classes at our state university. She’s made a few college-age friends, thank god, and, last week, was asked out by someone in one of her classes. She is a junior and the kid who asked her out is a college sophomore. Is this too much of an age/maturity gap? She hasn’t gone out with him yet.

Yes. Just say no.

[Anonymous]

Is it legal in your state?

[Anonymous]

If the grades don't touch, neither should they

[Anonymous]

Too much of a gap, and if he's a decent guy he'll understand when she reveals her age and declines.

[Anonymous]

I had a 20 year old ask me out when I was 16 (I started college at 16.) I said no because it made me uncomfortable to be with someone so much older than me. I was also still a virgin then and didnt want anyone that might have certain expectations. Of course, I ended up marrying someone 12 years older than me almost 10 years later!

[Anonymous]

It’s illegal so no. But if she were 18 and mature I would not object personally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is it legal in your state?

I think 17 is legal in all states.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the grades don't touch, neither should they

That is so stupid