Trump Wants to be Bob the Builder rather than President

It is common to imagine how the historians of the future will view the current period of the history of the United States. Assuming that we actually survive long enough to have a future with historians, I have to think that a good deal of any historian's time will be spent stifling bursts of laughter at the events we have been experiencing. This is the paradox of cult leader, convicted felon, and failed President Donald Trump. On the one hand, he is a dictatorial narcissist who is determined to destroy our democracy and turn the United States into a virtual branch of the Trump Organization. He is doing untold damage to this country in ways that may take generations to repair. But on the other hand, he is incompetent, cognitively impaired, and completely detached from the effective governance of the nation. The result is that while Trump is doing significant damage to the country, something that is decidedly not funny, he is often doing it in the most ridiculous and clumsy way imaginable. It is ironic that Trump, a man who seems to fear being laughed at more than anything, has become little more than a joke.

While the United States faces a number of challenges, including an ongoing war with Iran, high gas prices, increasing inflation, a slumping job market, and a host of other economic problems, Trump seems to believe that he is Bob the Builder rather than President. According to pre-release copies of “Regime Change” by New York Times reporters Maggie Haberman and Jonathan Swan, Trump is known to have personally used super glue to attach gaudy golden decorations to the Oval Office fireplace mantle. He has consistently obsessed over White House renovations, once even taking to Truth Social to take credit for revamping the Lincoln Bathroom.

Without telling anyone of his plans, Trump had the entire East Wing of the White House demolished. This was to make way for a monstrosity of a ballroom that will overshadow the rest of the White House structure. This ballroom has become Trump's primary interest since returning to the White House. He routinely spends time during meetings with foreign leaders and top officials of his government to show pictures or models of the planned development. Trump has probably devoted more time and energy to the ballroom project than any other topic during his presidency. He has personally visited stores to choose marble for the building.

Trump's other favorite project is the so-called "United States Triumphal Arch." This is a planned 250-foot-tall structure that Trump wants to put in Memorial Circle, a traffic circle on Memorial Drive between the end of the Arlington Memorial Bridge and Arlington National Cemetery. As has been the case with the ballroom, Trump has routinely displayed models of the arch during important meetings when he should have been focusing on national and international affairs. In his autocratic style, Trump has received approval from boards and commissions whose members he has appointed. However, he has argued that Congressional approval is not required. The Republican-led Congress, a virtual rubber stamp for Trump, has shown no interest in intervening. If it is built, the arch will block iconic views of Arlington National Cemetery from the D.C. side of the Potomac River and of the Lincoln Memorial from the Virginia side.

Time after time, Trump's efforts have ended in shambles, leaving things worse than they were before he attempted to "improve" them. As an example, consider the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts. In 2024, the Kennedy Center completed a $175 million expansion and renovation. As a result, the building was in great shape when Trump began his second term. Nevertheless, Trump dismissed appointed board members, appointed his own members, and got himself elected chairman. Programming changes that the new board ordered resulted in a large number of cancellations by performers who had been scheduled. Faced with an empty calendar, Trump reacted by announcing that the Center would be closed for two years for renovations.

In December, Trump's board voted to rename the Center to "The Donald J. Trump and The John F. Kennedy Memorial Center for the Performing Arts." Trump's name was immediately added to the facade of the building. However, this month a federal judge ruled that the board did not have the authority to change the Center's name and ordered the removal of Trump's name. This began one of the saddest charades to have burdened Washington, D.C. in ages. While Trump's name had been added in just a few hours with the assistance of two bucket loaders, removing his name became an immense feat of engineering. A large scaffold was built which was then covered in tarps. This blocked the view of the building so that observers were unable to see Trump's name being removed or, indeed, to confirm that the name has been removed. The scaffolding and the tarps remain to this day, nearly 10 days after Trump's name was allegedly removed. Trump may arguably be the most powerful individual in the world but his ego is so fragile that he cannot bear to look at a wall from which his name has been removed.

On the day of Trump's 80th birthday, which coincided with the birthday of the U.S. Army, Trump held a UFC match on the lawn of the White House. This may have been the closest that Trump has come yet to proving that the movie, Idiocracy was actually a documentary. The UFC stage was festooned with so many lights that multiple pilots attempting to land at nearby National Airport reported being blinded by them. The White House grounds were decked out in overwhelming amounts of commercial advertising supporting sponsors of the event. This included Bud Light, a brand that was once hated by MAGA. In the aftermath of the UFC fights, both the White House lawn and the entire grounds of the Ellipse were left with dead grass. The White House has reportedly budgeted $1 million to restore the grass, but nobody will be surprised if the ultimate cost exceeds that. Trump's projects have a way of going over budget.

The latest controversy involving Trump and his desire to remake everything is the Reflecting Pool on the National Mall. I personally visited the Mall not long ago and spent some time near the Reflecting Pool. There was absolutely nothing wrong with it. But Trump has to remake everything in the style of Mar-a-Lago. He must have heard the word "pool" and thought of the swimming pool at his home in Florida. Regardless of the motivation, he wanted the Reflecting Pool painted blue.

In true Trump style, he gave sweetheart deals — of course using taxpayers' money — to his buddies who were chosen because Trump knew them rather than their qualifications. The coating used to cover the pool was apparently not applied correctly and has started peeling off. Even before that, water from DC Water was apparently used to refill the pool. That water contains chemicals to address lead in the pipes but which I understand contain nutrients that encourage algae growth. As a result, once refilled, the pool immediately turned green. The National Park Service has been working diligently to combat the algae with limited success.

Trump took something that people hardly thought about and turned it into an international joke. There were quips that as part of the MOU with Iran, Trump had agreed to turn the Reflecting Pool Islamic green. Comedian Brent Terhune said it reminded him of the Chicago river on St. Patrick's Day. Trump's green water and peeling coating became a tourist attraction. There are even live streams being broadcast on the Internet.

However, Trump can never accept responsibility for anything. The problems with the Reflecting Pool are a result of his own ineptitude and mistakes. But instead of accepting blame, Trump has decided to blame others. In this case, Trump is blaming vandals. The problem is that there is no evidence of vandalism beyond the creations of Trump's imagination. As so often happens when Trump misrepresents reality, his underlings are struggling to make reality conform with Trump's wishes. As a result, authorities have been arresting people and accusing them of vandalism for such trivial actions as dipping their hands in the water.

To combat the nonexistent vandalism, Trump has deployed the National Guard, Homeland Security agents, and Park Police to guard the Reflecting Pool. Trump even flew over the pool in a helicopter in order to personally inspect it. He has said that it will need to be drained again in order to conduct repairs. As a jokester pointed out, in light of the still closed Strait of Hormuz, the Reflecting Pool is the second body of water that the U.S. military is unable to keep open. In all likelihood, if the pool is drained and refilled, the algae will reappear just as the first time, and we will be back to green water.

There is really no issue too minor while simultaneously being unrelated to his duties as President in which Trump will not involve himself. He took over three public golf courses in Washington, D.C. with plans to renovate them. He eventually returned two to the control of the National Links Trust, a non-profit that had been responsible for all three. But Trump still plans to remake one of them, which has already been filled with debris from the demolition of the East Wing of the White House. That will probably end up being the "Garden of Heroes" that Trump insists is necessary.

Trump campaigned on the cost of eggs and the state of the economy generally. Eggs were expensive as a result of bird flu, and with that under control, their price has dropped. But everything else is more expensive and is only going to get costlier. How many Trump voters, hoping for lower prices, expected Trump to spend the bulk of his time putting his name on buildings and creating monuments to himself? While Trump’s bumbling efforts are the source of many jokes and a welcome bit of levity, ultimately, what Trump is doing is not funny. Whether it is a public golf course, the East Wing of the White House, or an arch at the end of Memorial Bridge, Trump is showing that he can act without authorization or oversight. These may seem like minor issues, but they clearly demonstrate Trump's view of himself as a king.