Top Topics of 2011

At this time last year I confronted my inability to think of new topics about which to write for this blog. Despite my dislike of end-of-year lists, I decided to write about the most popular DCUM Forum topics of the year. An end-of-year list is the perfect solution for a blogger facing writer's block, but still able to query the forum's database.

The first list is the 10 topics started in 2011 with the most views:

10. "Nurse-in at Hirshhorn on 2/12 from 10-12" — 17,508 views. Of course breastfeeding, like politics and religion, is a topic you should never discuss with friends unless you want to make them enemies. But, since nobody on DCUM has any friends to begin with, we discuss the topic endlessly. That's even more true when the issue is not simply the benefit of breastfeeding, but the appropriateness of doing it in the middle of an art museum.

9. "I feel like a $hitastic Mom after reading the Kelly Hampton blog. Am I the only one?" — 17,939 views. I would probably have a pithy comment about this if I knew who Kelly Hampton was, had ever read her blog, and felt like a $hitastic mom. But, since none of those is true, I don't have anything to say.

8. "I haven't figured out how people raise children in DC" — 18,010 views. Take the perpetual DCUM fight between city dwellers and suburbanites, mix in some socio-economic class warfare, toss it with a little public school - private school contention, sprinkle it with opinions regarding the appropriate number of children per family, and what do you have? The perfect DCUM salad. Suitable for serving 18,010.

7. "Sidwell sued over staff psychologist's affair" — 18,535 views. This thread featured one of the best-known private schools in the nation, sex between a parent and a staff member (documented in explicit emails), and a very pissed off -- and very rich -- former husband. Who needs reality TV when you have the DCUM private school forum?

6. "Confessions II" 20,934 views. — The DCUM tradition of anonymous posting is criticized for contributing to rudeness in the forums and praised for allowing honest discussion. Another facet of the practice is that it provides an opportunity for people to get things off their chests. Based on this thread which is actually a follow-on to the first "Confessions" thread, DCUM users have a lot on their chests, or at least they did prior to this thread.

5. "2011 Admissions Results (classic style) Share Here!" — 24,850 views. There weren't a lot of posts in this thread in which parents revealed their success or failure in obtaining spots for their children in the area's coveted private schools. One gets the impression that there were a few obsessives glued to their computer screens clicking "refresh" until the mailman arrived with their own results.

4. "I'd Hit That Thursday" — 41,120 views. There was a controversy this year concerning whether DCUM users judge you by your stroller. That's obviously not true. The truth is that they judge you by your pectorals. But, only on Thursdays.

3. "Flame away - what are your most flame-worthy opinions?" — 41,948 views. I'm shocked, shocked I tell you, that DCUM users have flame-worthy opinions. Ninety-six pages of flame-worthy opinions in fact.

2. "Midwife charged in DC? Karen Carr, CPM..." — 99,589 views. This thread started simply as a request for information and turned into a battle between home-birth proponents and opponents. It had the added bonus of provoking threats of legal action against DCUM.

1. "Murder at Lululemon in Bethesda" — 114,724 views. Of course, a brutal murder at a Bethesda store in which many DCUM users shop would be subject to much discussion. But, thanks to Google, this discussion attracted participants from all over. The result is that it was the most viewed topic of the year on DCUM.

This list, with much overlap with the above, is the 10 topics of 2011 with the most responses:

10. "Nurse-in at Hirshhorn on 2/12 from 10-12" — 506 responses. Repeat from above.

9. "Yu Yang--is the student body predominately African American, does Yu Yang have a non-Chinese track.." — 517 responses. No DCUM list would be complete without mentioning Yu Ying, even if it's misspelled.

8. "45 and Horny" — 550 responses. The Washington City Paper said that DCUM users aren't getting laid. Based on this thread, it would be more accurate to say they aren't getting laid frequently enough. Also, "frequently enough" would apparently leave little time for anything else.

7. "District Security Officer Prohibited Me from Breastfeeding at DMV, Accusing Me of Indecent Exposure" — 583 responses. Similar to the Hirshhorn Nurse-in thread above, combining the endless breastfeeding debate with the appropriateness of nursing in the middle of a public hallway is like throwing gasoline on a fire. But, when the original poster is also a lawyer who launches a PR campaign on a scale unseen since the departure of Michelle Rhee, the result is one of DCUM's top threads.

6. "Pick one or the other in the pair then, in your response, give us another pair to choose from." — 739 responses. I have no idea what this thread is about, but I think it is sort of like "A word game" for meth users.

5. "Why don't you believe in God?" — 884 responses. A recent study suggested that Americans would vote for a gay Muslim for president before voting for an atheist. In this thread, the most hated group in American had the opportunity to explain itself.

4. "Murder at Lululemon in Bethesda" — 1,237 responses. Repeat from above.

3. "Flame away - what are your most flame-worthy opinions?" — 1,431 responses. Repeat from above.

2. "I'd Hit That Thursday" — 1,454 responses. Repeat from above.

1. "Midwife charged in DC? Karen Carr, CPM..." — 1,978 responses. Repeat from above.