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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Look. If you give someone more money than market rate and send them lots of appreciation and love, they will really like the job, really like working for you. They know what's out there and know that they have a good deal. Yes, if you want to keep someone for a long time, that's what you can do.

But, don't think that the nanny will be invested in your child for the long term and will make sacrifices for you out of love as you did to pay her the amount you did. You are not banking love by paying her more. Raising a child is a labor of love.  Perfect nanny will go through the trouble of getting your child to achieve their highest potential which means explaining the world all day, where toys come from, what to say to friends to advance social skills, etc etc etc? The average nanny only really makes sure they are fed, clean and not crying and the MB is reasonably happy about the cleanliness of the house.. High pay and excellent benefits does not bring the motivation to be the "best" nanny as described above. It just makes an average nanny do an average job but be happier while doing it. And when the pay ends, she will be gone, hopefully gradually after a string of social visits. When your child is applying to college, she will be a million miles away and she will not give a flippant care what tier school your child is applying to. No amount of money will make them care. Only the type of person that they are, which are exemplified by people who love children, may possibly make them care to the point of "oh that's nice."

Finding the nanny who love children and are in it for the children are one in a million. If you have found that person, and want to share your wealth, good for you. I highly doubt that you have found the one in a million though.

After being in your shoes and being an MB for over 10 years now, I give this recommendation. Save your money for the kids' college.
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Kids' college taken care of, thanks. Nanny may very well be the one in a million--she was the nanny for her former family for almost 20 years, and is still very much in touch with them. [/quote]

OH! Well this tells me a lot. It's very hard to give advice on the internet without knowing the full situation.

If she was with her former family for almost 20 years, kids were probably 18 and she sent them to college. Teenagers don't need a lot of care so she was probably keeping house. Most nannies, especially nannies on DCUM do not think that is within the responsibilities of the nanny. But, I do know neighbors and collegues who have nannies who watch kids and keep house. Housemanagers are paid more than nannies. They have a different skillset required too. If something breaks, she calls the repairman, writes the check, etc. Do you have this kind of "nanny?" If so, you should not be paying the nanny salary described here.[/quote]

You are a silly little woman, PP, and haven't the faintest idea what so many of us MBs want for our children.  NP here and I have been around this forum for a long time and for some reason, certain mothers feel the need to put down any MB who treats their nanny with respect, trust and pays her very well.

I have a ten year old and an eight year old who have had the same wonderful nanny since my eldest was born.  I love her as well for all the stability and security she has given to my children.  Yes, I pay her well and can afford her,  Beyond that, I respect her loving relationship with my children more than I want a household manager.  And I am happy to pay her a very good wage for her loyalty to our family.  [/quote]

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