Reply to Am I bad for eeking out every hour from my au pair?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Wow, I am an MB w/ a long-term nanny so I may not understand the whole au pair world, but it seems rather silly and petty to me that a parent would begrudge someone extra time off if they were around to stay w/ their children.  I actually like being able to send my nanny home early b/c it means I can spend more time w/ my children.  With two working parents any time we can spend with our children we do.  I wouldn't spend any energy sending passive aggressive messages to my au pair and just do what works/is right for my family.[/quote]

Maybe you didn't mean it like I took it but your post kind of illustrates why I feel guilty for using 45 hours and resent that.  Of note, I have 3 kids under 6 (6, 4 and 3 to be exact).  I work fulltime, so does my husband and we have no free help in the area (grandparents etc.).  
When I have a federal holiday, I have our AP work because it is finally a day where I can relax, take care of somethings etc.  Otherwise, it is ALWAYS me (and husband) taking care of the kids: mornings, evenings, weekends.  I am not a machine and would soo much like a break sometimes.  But you make me feel guilty because I sound like I don't want to spend extra time with my kids when I spent all of my none-working hours with them (excluding sleep).[/quote]

Your AP may want a break occasionally as well. Just saying. I'm sorry I just don't get the whole " wah, I decided to work and have young kids, and wah its hard work, and wah my husband and I actually have to take care of them". No one dropped these kids at your doorstep. [/quote]

Yeah because au pairs never get a break.  They work 45 hours a week MAX.  Which means they have 123 free hours a week to have a break.  No one's whining - we're just saying that it's not a mandate that you give your au pair absolutely every second off that you're not working at the expense of your own sanity.[/quote]

45 hours a week is a lot to ask of someone you are barely paying, IMHO. You don't need to give her off every second off that you get off, and I don't think anyone said that. But there is a middle ground between giving off every second you have off, and using all 45 hours each week just to use them and making your AP work every holiday because for some reason you think its so awful that you and your husband have to take care of the kids you birthed when you're home. What a strange statement to make. [/quote]

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