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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm a nanny, but I think you're being a jerk here.  YOU offered to do all these things for free, sending a clear message that you are uncomfortable with compensation/tit-for-tat.  The parents probably wracked their brain trying to come up with a gift you would accept, settled on this thinking that since it was related to kids and you supposedly did all of this out of love for their kids that it would be a fitting gift, and you snapped at her.

Figure out what you want.  If you want to be like family and do all this out of the goodness of your heart, then do it, but don't be passive aggressive and rude because they didn't guess the right way to thank you.  If what you really want is to be paid like a normal employee, then don't offer to work for free.[/quote]

+1.  You said that you have been seeing the family socially in the years between the time you provided paid care for the older child and paid care for the new baby.  So this is a situation where the lines between friendship and employer-employee are blurred, in large part as a result of your expressed enthusiasm for voluntarily spending time with the older child as you would a niece, friend's child, etc.  Yes, it would have been more appropriate for them to gift you with something more clearly for your personal enjoyment, as you say they've done in the past.  Keep in mind,. though, that this woman just had a new baby.  She may be planning another gift and just hasn't gotten to it yet.  Also, my guess is that the woman is so immersed in new baby euphoria right now that she actually thought you would enjoy wearing a baby sling in a pretty fabric of your choice rather than hers.  At any rate, you were rude to snap at her and should have been more gracious about accepting the gift (or declining it nicely if it is truly something you would never use).

Also, ask yourself if you secretly feel that the family should have insisted on paying you, regardless of your protestations.  If so, stop playing games and just tell them you would prefer a strictly business relationship now that you are working for them again.  If that isn't the case, just accept that the mother is a bit awkward about gifting and move on.[/quote]

+2[/quote]

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