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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't get why this is a micromange-y request.  [b]How is it different from a Catherine wanting to be Cate instead of Cathy or a Deborah preferring not to be called Debbie?  Why can't parents advocate for what their children are called? [/b] We called our DC Berry in utero - I definitely don't want that nickname sticking to him generally and I'm not sure what is unreasonable about that!  This isn't a nickname everyone uses - just the parents. The nanny has probably just picked it up because she hears the parents use it and assumes that it is what they prefer the baby be called, but if they stop using it in front of her and explain they would rather she and everyone else uses the child's name, I am just not sure what the big deal is.[/quote]

They absolutely can! But if you call your Catherine by Cate, you should anticipate that others will as well. If you continue to refer to your baby as Berry, you should assume that other loving caregivers and family members might also adopt that nickname. You get to set the tone for what you want your child to be called, but if my parents had called me Suzy but demanded my nanny call me Susan, that would have been weird. [/quote]

But this is not different from what I suggested.  I am confused by what the issue with asking the nanny not to use the child's nickname but agree the parents need to stop using it in front of her.  But assuming they do that, what is the big deal?  Why is it micromanage-y?[/quote]

Asking someone not to use a name for their child that they have heard you use is weird because it puts the fault on the nanny, in this case, when the responsibility lies with the parents.

Discontinuing its use allows the parents to take responsibility for putting an end to its use. If the nanny is still using the discontinued nickname commonly 3 months down the road, then that would be an appropriate time to say you'd regretted using it as you wanted to be sure your Susan went by Susan among their family, friends, and neighbors. That would put an end to it, politely.[/quote]

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