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[quote=Anonymous]If you don't have friends for DD to have playdates with, why do you assume your nanny can find such friends? I totally get why you want #1, but given that you don't seem to be able to do it, I don't know why it's a fail that your nanny can't either. That said, if you set up playdates for your DD or have arranged with another MB for your nannies to set up playdates and that doesn't happen, that's a problem.

Other PPs have given you good advice on this: send your nanny and DD to a few classes; that way, they'll meet other nannies and kids. Worst case, your DD gets the socialization you want at the classes (if you find classes with a narrow age range -- dance classes often have one -- so much the better from your perspective); best case, your nanny hits it off with another nanny with an appropriately aged kid and playdates start. That's what we do. We love our new nanny, but realize she's not a huge go-getter in terms of designing new outings for our kids to do (she mostly takes them to the same few places she's comfortable with), so we signed our DD up for two classes in the neighborhood.

In terms of #2, I personally wouldn't mind. Unless you've actually observed your nanny ignoring your DD during such playdates, I wouldn't worry at all. In fact, I think it's great that my nanny has a friend because then she won't be so bored, has a reason to get my kids out of the house, etc. I think it makes her a better nanny to get some adult company at the same time; I know I play better with my kids when I have them all day when I mix in a coffee date or something for my sanity.

My nanny seems to have made 1 nanny friend. My kids are 2.5 and 5 months, the ones that the other nanny looks after are 6.5, 4 (both in school most of the day) and almost 1. We know the other family well, so that helps, but obviously, the age ranges don't mesh perfectly for my 2.5 year to get a playmate at all unless they meet afterschool; and, even if they do, while she likes the two "big" kids and they tolerate her well, there's a big gap. Nonetheless, I think any socialization is good and having a friend to hang out with/get advice from is good for my nanny. (Someday, the two babies may play well since they're only 6 months apart, but that's awhile off.) I have no reason at all to think my nanny is ignoring the kids just because she has another nanny to hang out with too.[/quote]

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