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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Try reading some Kazdin or Ross Greene and see if you think their work applies.  If so, it might be worth discussing with the parents.

- Mom of a very challenging boy for whom the work of those two people have been hugely helpful.[/quote]

Thank you, I'm going to look into both![/quote]

Hope it helps.  If you haven't found it yet, here are a couple of links for you:

http://www.livesinthebalance.org/
http://alankazdin.com/the-kazdin-method-for-parenting-the-defiant-child-with-no-pills-no-therapy-no-contest-of-wills/

FWIW, Kazdin was of the most help when my son was 3-4, Greene's work is proving invaluable with my 5-6 year old.  Being able to have conversations with the child really helps w/ Greene's approach, especially if you're dealing w/ a child whose intellect is far ahead of his emotional development (as is the case w/ my son.)

Good luck!  Thank you for not giving up on him.  :-)  There are days when I feel like Anne Sullivan to my Helen Keller equivalent but when you get the little breakthroughs and they feel understood there are some amazing moments.  I have also found that w/ our boy these challenging times come in waves.  There was a three-four month period right before he turned 4 that was truly awful, and then another stretch just after he turned 5 - again for a couple of months.  And then there were huge leaps forward.  So hang in there if you can.  Hopefully you and the parents can be a team - obviously they'll need to be on the same page.[/quote]

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