Reply to Nonproactive nanny who won't schedule playdates

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I'm a little confused as to why you are so hung up on playdates specifically.  Why is it insufficient for DC to socialize with children at these other activities?  If she goes to story time at the same library every week, she's going to have plenty of chances to play with the same group of kids and will build friendships that way.

But that said, I don't think it's unreasonable to ask of your nanny.  I certainly plan daily outings as well as indoor sensory projects with my 1yo charge daily.  I also make just under $900 a week--not epic for this area, but pretty solid.  If you are paying at the low end of the scale, and your only issue has the simple workaround that you have to plan activities yourself, then you just need to figure out whether you can find someone better in that range.  If you are paying $750 or higher, then I would definitely expect more.  Either way, before moving on to a new nanny think through all of your needs and priorities so that you don't end up switching again soon.[/quote]

Story times are not the same thing as playdates; the free play aspect is really short, like 15 minutes.  When I schedule playdates for DD, they used to be shorter when she was younger, but now they are typically over an hour long.  And unlike story time, which is 20-30 kids, our playdates are with maybe 2-3 other kids.  I can tell that DD is like me, she likes being with others, but she is a natural introvert and prefers very small groups.  When it's a big group, e.g., story time, she gets overwhelmed and keeps her distance from the other kids.

I am paying the nanny market rate for an experienced, good nanny, but not Mary Poppins.  I expect a good nanny to be able to schedule some playdates.  I am not even being demanding about the details, just that she schedule them!  I definitely could find a better nanny at this pay range, but the problem is that I believe it will be hard to find someone who is flexible like she is about hours and such.  Maybe I am being obstinate and unrealistic about the nanny and that she is set in her ways, but I feel like if I say the "magic words," i.e., find the right way of getting through to her, we should be able to solve this problem and continue employing her.  Just wish I knew what those magic words are![/quote]

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