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[quote=Anonymous]MB here.

You probably shouldn't have accepted a FB friend request.

Re a reference letter - I think you can write a fairly basic, fair letter that doesn't misrepresent anything.

Something like:

Ms. X was employed as a nanny for our two sons, ages y and z, for the period of ____.   During that time she was responsible for cooking meals, chauferring them to and from school and activities, doing their laundry, etc....

Ms. X was always punctual and reliable.  She was particularly good at (find something to say - even if it "always leaving the kitchen and play spaces clean and organized at the end of the day).

We wish her the best in her career.

Then you're done.  You've not said anything untrue or unkind, and you've given her something documenting her time of employment.

If she presses you to say more you can always say "I'm sorry but that's all I feel comfortable saying, given that I don't think it ended up being a good fit."

If someone contacts you by phone for a more detailed reference you can answer those questions as you see fit, but it's certainly possible to write a limited, factual reference letter that essentially verifies employment and some basic skills.

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