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[quote=Anonymous]I started an after school nanny job two weeks ago for a child in Kinder and a 2nd grader. I pick tem up from school, take them to the park/library/play dates/ one organized activity a week, drive them home, supervise homework for the older one, cook dinner, and supervise baths. I'm a newer nanny, with a background in education and 10 years of extensive babysitting (including overnights). I really like the parents, our parenting strategies/techniques are very similar, and the kids seem like interesting, funny kids. They had one nanny for many years,  an after school nanny last year, a few short term ones over the summer, and MB has been picking them up while trying to arrange care.  The transition has been rough, and I was wondering if anyone had any advice.  MB's advice has been to let things go/pick your battles while they're dealing with the transition even though she doesn't usually do that. I've been letting a lot of the disrespect/attention seeking behavior go, but am starting to get really frustrated and doubt myself. I think part of my problem is that I'm pretty used to kids immediately liking me, and so haven't really honed my winning-them-over skills. I'm also with them when they're exhausted after school (esp the k'er), and getting through homework/trying to get them to sit at the table and eat dinner/take baths doesn't leave a lot of time for fun stuff always. I do try and make time to do something fun together--we've had several successful art projects etc, and they're always happier/easier then. I'm running into problems with the non-negotiables, I had to grab the kindergartener's bike handlebars yesterday because she wanted to go a different way home from the park and started screaming at me that she was going to cross the (busy) street by herself and go home alone and she didn't have to listen to me because I was stupid. I later worked it out that the way she wanted to go was the way they usually go home, and I talked with her about things she could have told me so I would know it was important to her to go home that way.  Today the GPS wanted to take me down a road that was temporarily closed for construction, and I was told 'you're so dumb you can't drive' and various other things.  The second grader rolls his eyes, yells No! No! No!, and screams at me about how I'm so annoying/mean/boring etc when I say things like 'do you want a snack', 'is your seatbelt buckled?', and 'would you like a hair band for soccer practice?'. I'm also getting major pushback when I ask him to do anything, but it's also when I say anything at all.  They're not a tv-watching family, so using screen time as a motivator won't work. Does any one have any suggestions? How long does it take school age kids to adapt to a new caregiver usually?[/quote]

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