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[quote=Anonymous]OP here: Thanks for all the replies, especially last PP. Some very supportive comments. I am actually in therapy, have been for the past few months because I don't enjoy living this way. I'm completely against prescription drugs for myself personally, so it's a battle of the mind for me.

As I said in the op, my SA isn't readily apparent to the outside observer. It doesn't affect me almost at all for non-personal interactions such as grocery clerks or doctors. It's mostly with people I interact with regularly but have not grown a friendship with, or those with the potential to be mainstays in my life, such as employers. It's also very hard for me to make new friends.

Actually now that I think about it, my first ever panic attack was brought on by an incredibly hostile MB (one of my first nanny jobs years ago - the mom had stopped taking her anti-psych meds and screamed inches from my face until I broke down... if I remember correctly, I had not done the laundry the way she wanted or something).

To answer a question, I just turned 29. Been making slow but steady progress... it's one of those 'two steps forward, one step back' things. I'm looking forward to my 30's, haha. My reason for posting is because I'll be looking for a new position soon and have started dreading going through the whole hunt and interview process again. On top of everything, I was raised in a very rural area and bullied mercilessly all throughout my school years, so it seems 'social butterfly' was just never an option to begin with. I know every moment of exposure is another step toward more confidence, but it's a very hard road. [/quote]

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