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[quote=Anonymous]http://m.washingtonpost.com/national/mothers-more-fatigued-than-dads-but-find-jobs-and-child-care-meaningful-report-finds/2013/10/08/37284b2c-2fc4-11e3-9ccc-2252bdb14df5_story_1.html

There was a long discussion on the parents' side ofthe forums, and reading it, I realized that I, the nanny, take on a lot of the "psychic burden" for my nanny family.  Does anyone else feel this way?  I don't resent it, but I am leaving my current family after a long time and I think this is part of why MB and I have butter heads so much over the last few months (leading to my decision to leave).  When I started here 4 1/2 years ago, the charges were a newborn and a young toddler and MB was working 70 hrs a week (and I worked 55 hours).  I took over the little stuff like clipping nails, making sure clothes and shoes were the right size/season appropriate planning for/shopping for/ cooking dinner, bahing kids, brushing hair, getting dressed for school, communicating with teachers, scheduling and taking them to doctor/dentist/etc., caring for them when sick, remembering to restock allergy meds, filling out school forms, hiring sitters for back-to-school nights or my days off, etc.  I don't mean to imply that MB isn't involved, but when I started out with this family, she didn't have the bandwidth for a lot of this, and thus left it to me.  Over the last year, I think she has grown resentful of me doing a lot of this and has tried to take on more, but the way she has gone about it has ultimately just revealed some communication problems that were always there.  I think if I had realized sooner that this is what she was tryin to do, things might have gone differently.  Instead I just felt criticized and undermined as I would try to take care of things according to the system that has worked for 4 1/2 years and she would start questioning me/telling me she wanted to do it X way instead, which felt like everything I had been doing for years wasn't good enough anymore.

Have any other nannies been in this situation?  How has it affected your relationship as the kids outgrow full-time care?[/quote]

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