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[quote=Anonymous]We have had 4 Au pairs and have not had this problem before.  Our current Au pair prefers to spend the majority of her free time in our family room on her computer.  Or maybe in our living room, or the den or dining room, or the sitting room upstairs.   We love her and get along we'll.  But we are feeling a bit... I don't know...like there aren't enough boundaries?  We would never have thought that we would need to define what group spaces could be used and by whom and when.  But I never know when I might walk into a room to find her skyping or spreading out her schoolwork.  I guess I'm uncomfortable with her comfort level....she brings her coffee and donut and settles in (which I've already got on a list to address: no food outside the kitchen unless its in her room)

But I can't really tell her that I am uncomfortable with her hanging out everywhere all the time, can I?  Our other Au pairs had a much more active social life outside the house and mostly preferred their room unless we had a specific activity we asked her to join us for (like I imagine most teenagers are like, right?)

This Au pair is more of a homebody..still...I'm glad she's so happy and comfortable here, but I am struggling with the lack of privacy, private time with my family, a feeling of intrusion and just her constant presence, most nights and weekends. While I am really fond of her, I am afraid I'm beginning to become resentful.  Advice?
Btw, it's not cultural or age related and she's been here almost 6 months now.  [/quote]

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