NAC wrote:You’re obviously very defensive. I must have touched a sore spot. When it comes to children it’s not slander. If a nanny did something that could have harmed your child it’s the potential employer (the parents) right to know as a nanny will not use the harmed employer as a reference. Furthermore, a negligent nanny should think about other employment opportunities because children are fragile and those types of mistakes should NEVER be made.

AGAIN if so negligent you should’ve called the cops CPS whatever you didn’t! I would leave it alone. If someone calls you for a reference speak with them if not it’s not up to you to define negligent. If that was the case you should’ve called the cops you didn’t. If someone was so harmful negligent I would’ve been to court not crying on a website because this person is posting.

NAC wrote:1. You have a whole lot to say about something you know nothing about “anonymously”
2. No one said anything about slandering
3. Please if you have nothing useful to say keep your negative defensive comments for your inner circle.
My post came from a good place looking for real advice not to be attacked. I’m sorry nobody has taught you better and I pray nobody trusts you with their kids.

Anonymous wrote:Okay so OP, while I understand that the rude comments are unnecessary and definitely sorry if your children were neglected, you're responding to people here sounding frustrated about why they are coming on something they know nothing about yet you have not provided relevant details for people to even give solid advice.

So the question would be what are you looking for? Advice? a listening ear? validation? a proper action plan? Either way you would need to provide relevant information for people to actually give helpful advice. The problem is sometimes we post vaguely and get frustrated at the responses (and I don't agree with rude responses btw).

How long ago did this nanny work for you? It seems like this incident happened a while ago (your post isnt clear on this)? If so, my question is why would you wait until you see negligent nanny post her Ad to find it relevant to take action or ask for advice? Is it fear when it initially happened or you didn't think it was that bad and now that you see her Ad, the reality has set in? Those are all important questions to address and this may guide how you handle this.

Based on the limited info you posted, if I were you and I truly believe without a shadow of a doubt that the particular nanny harmed or was negligent with my children, then I would take immediate action (even way before they start posting for a job) as child neglect is a serious and urgent matter. Options could be:
1. if you haven't already have a conversation with the nanny (assuming you are still in touch with her) to let her know what she did was not okay and that you've documented it, evidence and everything.

2. report-- cops, CPS etc. The question why did you wait so long may pop up, so be prepared to address that.

3. if you have another family calling you to be a reference, then be honest about your experience and provide them details-- that way you protect them from something similar.

4. In addition to comments from here, get advice from a legal or any relevant professional- their advice is more accurate and relevant than random internet folks who really don't know the situation because you haven't provided details. A professional will require you to provide details in order to help you especially if this has to do with children.

...on the other hand if you end up stepping back to rethink things and realize that whatever happened wasn't neglect but that for whatever reason you do not like that this nanny is looking for another job, then evaluate why that is and in the meantime leave this person alone as she has the right to continue her career and find income to support herself while supporting another family.

We wouldn't know what exactly is the case here except you. Remember, the internet can only go as far as commenting based on what you choose to share and some of the advice may intentionally or unintentionally be unhelpful based on the bias or omission of info...but at the end of the day internet people won't suffer the consequences--you would or maybe in this case your nanny assuming whatever happened was not neglect as you put it (which if you're truly in touch with your humanity, that cannot leave you feeling good for a long time) and I truly hope this is not the case.

All the best OP.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay so OP, while I understand that the rude comments are unnecessary and definitely sorry if your children were neglected, you're responding to people here sounding frustrated about why they are coming on something they know nothing about yet you have not provided relevant details for people to even give solid advice.

So the question would be what are you looking for? Advice? a listening ear? validation? a proper action plan? Either way you would need to provide relevant information for people to actually give helpful advice. The problem is sometimes we post vaguely and get frustrated at the responses (and I don't agree with rude responses btw).

How long ago did this nanny work for you? It seems like this incident happened a while ago (your post isnt clear on this)? If so, my question is why would you wait until you see negligent nanny post her Ad to find it relevant to take action or ask for advice? Is it fear when it initially happened or you didn't think it was that bad and now that you see her Ad, the reality has set in? Those are all important questions to address and this may guide how you handle this.

Based on the limited info you posted, if I were you and I truly believe without a shadow of a doubt that the particular nanny harmed or was negligent with my children, then I would take immediate action (even way before they start posting for a job) as child neglect is a serious and urgent matter. Options could be:
1. if you haven't already have a conversation with the nanny (assuming you are still in touch with her) to let her know what she did was not okay and that you've documented it, evidence and everything.

2. report-- cops, CPS etc. The question why did you wait so long may pop up, so be prepared to address that.

3. if you have another family calling you to be a reference, then be honest about your experience and provide them details-- that way you protect them from something similar.

4. In addition to comments from here, get advice from a legal or any relevant professional- their advice is more accurate and relevant than random internet folks who really don't know the situation because you haven't provided details. A professional will require you to provide details in order to help you especially if this has to do with children.

...on the other hand if you end up stepping back to rethink things and realize that whatever happened wasn't neglect but that for whatever reason you do not like that this nanny is looking for another job, then evaluate why that is and in the meantime leave this person alone as she has the right to continue her career and find income to support herself while supporting another family.

We wouldn't know what exactly is the case here except you. Remember, the internet can only go as far as commenting based on what you choose to share and some of the advice may intentionally or unintentionally be unhelpful based on the bias or omission of info...but at the end of the day internet people won't suffer the consequences--you would or maybe in this case your nanny assuming whatever happened was not neglect as you put it (which if you're truly in touch with your humanity, that cannot leave you feeling good for a long time) and I truly hope this is not the case.

All the best OP.

Right. Sadly, no former employers have ever been honest with us about their former nannies who turned out to be unreliable and incompetent. At best, it's that their child care needs changed.

Anonymous wrote:Okay so OP, while I understand that the rude comments are unnecessary and definitely sorry if your children were neglected, you're responding to people here sounding frustrated about why they are coming on something they know nothing about yet you have not provided relevant details for people to even give solid advice.

So the question would be what are you looking for? Advice? a listening ear? validation? a proper action plan? Either way you would need to provide relevant information for people to actually give helpful advice. The problem is sometimes we post vaguely and get frustrated at the responses (and I don't agree with rude responses btw).

How long ago did this nanny work for you? It seems like this incident happened a while ago (your post isnt clear on this)? If so, my question is why would you wait until you see negligent nanny post her Ad to find it relevant to take action or ask for advice? Is it fear when it initially happened or you didn't think it was that bad and now that you see her Ad, the reality has set in? Those are all important questions to address and this may guide how you handle this.

Based on the limited info you posted, if I were you and I truly believe without a shadow of a doubt that the particular nanny harmed or was negligent with my children, then I would take immediate action (even way before they start posting for a job) as child neglect is a serious and urgent matter. Options could be:
1. if you haven't already have a conversation with the nanny (assuming you are still in touch with her) to let her know what she did was not okay and that you've documented it, evidence and everything.

2. report-- cops, CPS etc. The question why did you wait so long may pop up, so be prepared to address that.

3. if you have another family calling you to be a reference, then be honest about your experience and provide them details-- that way you protect them from something similar.

4. In addition to comments from here, get advice from a legal or any relevant professional- their advice is more accurate and relevant than random internet folks who really don't know the situation because you haven't provided details. A professional will require you to provide details in order to help you especially if this has to do with children.

...on the other hand if you end up stepping back to rethink things and realize that whatever happened wasn't neglect but that for whatever reason you do not like that this nanny is looking for another job, then evaluate why that is and in the meantime leave this person alone as she has the right to continue her career and find income to support herself while supporting another family.

We wouldn't know what exactly is the case here except you. Remember, the internet can only go as far as commenting based on what you choose to share and some of the advice may intentionally or unintentionally be unhelpful based on the bias or omission of info...but at the end of the day internet people won't suffer the consequences--you would or maybe in this case your nanny assuming whatever happened was not neglect as you put it (which if you're truly in touch with your humanity, that cannot leave you feeling good for a long time) and I truly hope this is not the case.

All the best OP.