Have you ever canceled a date-night babysitting job for another one that pays better?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MB here. I never cancel on a sitter without offering the full payment. That's only happened once or twice in 5 years. If someone cancels on me, I wouldn't hire them again. If that's not a problem for them, so be it. It's not meant to be punative, I just don't want to deal with people that would cancel. (Except in real emergencies for a normally reliable sitter)

And, sure, I would quit my job for a better one. But I'd give the agreed on notice. There's a difference between changing jobs and breaking a specific committment.

A babysitting job is just...a job. No different than yours except duration.
OP did state that she gives 3 days notice.
As a babysitter, I would give sufficient notice as well.
For your job it is 2-4 weeks (in most cases).
For a babysitting job it is 24-48 hours.

I wouldn't expect a job I had quit for a higher paying job to subsequently rehire me if I needed work later though.

Cool beans. Your little sitting job is not the end all be all that you think it is.

Totally fair. If you aren't interested in babysitting for us anymore, by all means cancel. You get more money. We find someone more reliable. Win win.

I will say though, the one sitter who has cancelled multiple times (with lame excuses), and who we stopped using as a result, asks me every time I run into her when she can babysit next so I am not sure it always works out as you are suggesting. I've never had another sitter cancel. And I always offer to pay/reschedule if I have to cancel (which I have done twice - once when my grandfather died and once when DC was too sick to leave with a sitter.)

That's your sitter. I've never had to ask for sitting jobs in my life. Also can we stop with the whole "professional reputation" crap? Babysitting is not a professional job. Its an occasional gig college students do for spending money, so no I'm not worried about my "professional reputation". Eventually I'll be on to my actual career, and canceling a sitting job is not going to affect that I promise.

It's your prerogative to feel this way but it strikes me as a short sighted view. You don't think having references from a regular babysitting employer or even an introduction might be helpful to getting started on your "real career"? I've made introductions for babysitters before to friends in fields they were interested in, and given non-babysitting related references. And on the other side of this, one of my early regular references for my first jobs out of college, before I had other professional references, was a family I used to babysit for as a teenager - they helped me get a number of non-babysitting jobs until I built up enough related professional references to use (most jobs ask for three). Not sure if you are in DC, but this is a small town, and you never know who knows who. It doesn't hurt to build connections and seize every opportunity to shine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MB here. I never cancel on a sitter without offering the full payment. That's only happened once or twice in 5 years. If someone cancels on me, I wouldn't hire them again. If that's not a problem for them, so be it. It's not meant to be punative, I just don't want to deal with people that would cancel. (Except in real emergencies for a normally reliable sitter)

And, sure, I would quit my job for a better one. But I'd give the agreed on notice. There's a difference between changing jobs and breaking a specific committment.

A babysitting job is just...a job. No different than yours except duration.
OP did state that she gives 3 days notice.
As a babysitter, I would give sufficient notice as well.
For your job it is 2-4 weeks (in most cases).
For a babysitting job it is 24-48 hours.

I wouldn't expect a job I had quit for a higher paying job to subsequently rehire me if I needed work later though.

Cool beans. Your little sitting job is not the end all be all that you think it is.

Totally fair. If you aren't interested in babysitting for us anymore, by all means cancel. You get more money. We find someone more reliable. Win win.

I will say though, the one sitter who has cancelled multiple times (with lame excuses), and who we stopped using as a result, asks me every time I run into her when she can babysit next so I am not sure it always works out as you are suggesting. I've never had another sitter cancel. And I always offer to pay/reschedule if I have to cancel (which I have done twice - once when my grandfather died and once when DC was too sick to leave with a sitter.)

That's your sitter. I've never had to ask for sitting jobs in my life. Also can we stop with the whole "professional reputation" crap? Babysitting is not a professional job. Its an occasional gig college students do for spending money, so no I'm not worried about my "professional reputation". Eventually I'll be on to my actual career, and canceling a sitting job is not going to affect that I promise.

It's your prerogative to feel this way but it strikes me as a short sighted view. You don't think having references from a regular babysitting employer or even an introduction might be helpful to getting started on your "real career"? I've made introductions for babysitters before to friends in fields they were interested in, and given non-babysitting related references. And on the other side of this, one of my early regular references for my first jobs out of college, before I had other professional references, was a family I used to babysit for as a teenager - they helped me get a number of non-babysitting jobs until I built up enough related professional references to use (most jobs ask for three). Not sure if you are in DC, but this is a small town, and you never know who knows who. It doesn't hurt to build connections and seize every opportunity to shine.

I understand that, but canceling on one sitting gig isn't going to kill my career or my reputation.

[Anonymous]

It looks like the majority of posters on this thread agree that canceling on agreed commitments is a poor choice, 16:54.

You can keep making excuses all you like, but you're wrong.

Since you seem to be a little dim on this point, you go ahead and do what you want and let this thread go. Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It looks like the majority of posters on this thread agree that canceling on agreed commitments is a poor choice, 16:54.

You can keep making excuses all you like, but you're wrong.

Since you seem to be a little dim on this point, you go ahead and do what you want and let this thread go. Thanks!

Was your bitchy comment necessary?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It looks like the majority of posters on this thread agree that canceling on agreed commitments is a poor choice, 16:54.

You can keep making excuses all you like, but you're wrong.

Since you seem to be a little dim on this point, you go ahead and do what you want and let this thread go. Thanks!

Where are you getting majority from? Only MBs count? Because most sitters said they've done it, and the world didnt stop turning.

[Anonymous]

OP I'm a nanny who said I never would cancel because I value my professional (and personal) reputation too much. The families I babysit for are intimate friends, neighbors, or coworkers of the families I nanny for which is why my conduct while babysitting could affect references down the line. If you're not worried about that, go ahead, but someday if you have kids and the sitter leaves you in a bind you'll understand the crappy position you put the parents in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes I have. Not often, but I have, and I don't believe it makes me an awful person. This is a business transaction, that's all. You have to pay a competitive rate to retain my business. If its too easy for me to find a better job, you aren't competitive. It's not the same thing as promising to do something for a friend. With a few days notice, I would definitely take the better paying job or work for the better family (leaves dinner for me, shows up on time, well behaved kids).

And PP is exactly right; her advice will get you walked all over. This is not a moral decision, its a business decision. When you enter this type of agreement, you understand that the other party is going to serve their interest, and you should serve yours. Your job is to be what they need, and they you. If they aren't what you need, you move on. PP is exactly the kind of nanny on here whining about how her bosses don't "care" about her or how she's going to pay her bills when they do x, y, z.

The whole competitive rates spiel is an excuse. If you didn't like the initial offer you wouldn't have accepted it. I get it, you do what you have to do to survive. But you should be honest with yourself enough to at least admit on an anonymous forum that you're unreliable and break commitments.

+100. It was a business transaction until you accepted the job. At that point it became a business commitment that YOU made, whether you liked the rate or not. The family was relying on you and you had a professional and ethical obligation to follow through. Do what you need to do, but don't kid yourself that this is okay, and know that people who treat their commitments this way generally get the same kind of treatment back in spades.

[Anonymous]

Okay ladies, remember your holier than thou attitudes next time someone wants to let their nanny go without notice, or you want to argue against guaranteed hours, or that its not your concern if nanny can live on the wage you pay her. Then, I'm sure its just business, right?

[Anonymous]

Most MBs do not agree with giving no notice unlessa there was a very serious safety issue.
Most MBs support guaranteed hrs for FT nannies and think it makes sense did a PT nanny with a sizable hours number that you do not want to lose.
Whether or not market rate is a wage a nanny can live on depends on many many factors like whether she is married, what size places she decides to live in, how long her commute is, if she has a roommate, how many kids she has, how many hours she works, etc, etc. so given all of that it remains entirely reasonable to pay a nanny according to market rates (well above min wage in this area) rather than what it might cost any individual person to live on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most MBs do not agree with giving no notice unlessa there was a very serious safety issue.
Most MBs support guaranteed hrs for FT nannies and think it makes sense did a PT nanny with a sizable hours number that you do not want to lose.
Whether or not market rate is a wage a nanny can live on depends on many many factors like whether she is married, what size places she decides to live in, how long her commute is, if she has a roommate, how many kids she has, how many hours she works, etc, etc. so given all of that it remains entirely reasonable to pay a nanny according to market rates (well above min wage in this area) rather than what it might cost any individual person to live on.

Who said anything about no notice?
If you read OP's post, she said she gives 3 days notice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Okay ladies, remember your holier than thou attitudes next time someone wants to let their nanny go without notice, or you want to argue against guaranteed hours, or that its not your concern if nanny can live on the wage you pay her. Then, I'm sure its just business, right?

Again, nobody here is talking about cancelling without notice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay ladies, remember your holier than thou attitudes next time someone wants to let their nanny go without notice, or you want to argue against guaranteed hours, or that its not your concern if nanny can live on the wage you pay her. Then, I'm sure its just business, right?

Again, nobody here is talking about cancelling without notice.

That's not the point. Have you ever tried to find a babysitter with only 2 or 3 days notice? It's not so easy to do. And don't start giving me the whole, "babysitters get cancelled on with only 2 or 3 days notice all the time." There was only 1 time I cancelled on a babysitter because DC was too sick to leave with a sitter and I paid her the full amount anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay ladies, remember your holier than thou attitudes next time someone wants to let their nanny go without notice, or you want to argue against guaranteed hours, or that its not your concern if nanny can live on the wage you pay her. Then, I'm sure its just business, right?

Again, nobody here is talking about cancelling without notice.

That's not the point. Have you ever tried to find a babysitter with only 2 or 3 days notice? It's not so easy to do. And don't start giving me the whole, "babysitters get cancelled on with only 2 or 3 days notice all the time." There was only 1 time I cancelled on a babysitter because DC was too sick to leave with a sitter and I paid her the full amount anyway.

That's you though. Its been discussed on here many times and most nannies and MBs agree that more than 48 hours notice is time enough to cancel without owing payment. It goes both ways.

The different attitudes on display in this thread are interesting:
http://www.dcurbanmom.com/nanny-forum/posts/list/279722.page

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay ladies, remember your holier than thou attitudes next time someone wants to let their nanny go without notice, or you want to argue against guaranteed hours, or that its not your concern if nanny can live on the wage you pay her. Then, I'm sure its just business, right?

Again, nobody here is talking about cancelling without notice.

That's not the point. Have you ever tried to find a babysitter with only 2 or 3 days notice? It's not so easy to do. And don't start giving me the whole, "babysitters get cancelled on with only 2 or 3 days notice all the time." There was only 1 time I cancelled on a babysitter because DC was too sick to leave with a sitter and I paid her the full amount anyway.

You may have only cancelled on a sitter once but I have been cancelled on dozens of times as have most sitters.
It happens way more frequently than you think. Most parents do not pay a sitter when they cancel.
Your situation is very unique and is not a true representation of most cancellation situations.
I have cancelled on families before in order to take a job that pays more.
I've done it 2 or 3 times in 10 years and the families never knew. Reputation intact, families none the wiser.
This happens so infrequently that it is kind of ridiculous to even have this debate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay ladies, remember your holier than thou attitudes next time someone wants to let their nanny go without notice, or you want to argue against guaranteed hours, or that its not your concern if nanny can live on the wage you pay her. Then, I'm sure its just business, right?

Again, nobody here is talking about cancelling without notice.

That's not the point. Have you ever tried to find a babysitter with only 2 or 3 days notice? It's not so easy to do. And don't start giving me the whole, "babysitters get cancelled on with only 2 or 3 days notice all the time." There was only 1 time I cancelled on a babysitter because DC was too sick to leave with a sitter and I paid her the full amount anyway.

That's you though. Its been discussed on here many times and most nannies and MBs agree that more than 48 hours notice is time enough to cancel without owing payment. It goes both ways.

The different attitudes on display in this thread are interesting:
http://www.dcurbanmom.com/nanny-forum/posts/list/279722.page

Actually reading that thread there was only one MB who said she wouldn't pay a cancellation fee if she cancelled (at all - but noted she always gives a few days notice). I am not defending that position but it seemed she tends to hire babysitters for whom the arrangement is much more casual anyway - which probably goes both ways. However, most MBs on that thread and this one don't object to cancellation fees and made it clear they would cancel for emergencies - sick child, death in the family - not just because they found cheaper sitter. I did notice one sitter on that thread mentioned she didn't charge a cancellation fee but would just stop sitting for families who cancelled often, which makes sense to me. I'd stop using a sitter who cancelled often too. So yeah, if you do it once or twice in ten years and get away with it - congrats on screwing someone over and making more money! But sitters who do it regularly - as some on this thread suggested they would - are going to find themselves with many fewer jobs in the long run. Better solution - why don't you just decide your rate and only accept jobs that pay it?