What are the questions you WISH you asked during the interview

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry, OP. you have apparently never posted here before. this forum is part for answering questions but really mostly a chance for people to voice opinions. Best shot at that is a thread like this that gets "controversial".

To your question, I think questions about views on appropriate discipline, eating habits, outings are good. Also asking for specifics on HOW she works to incorporate learning through play. Also, if she is not from the US, I would ask her to read aloud in the interview. our nanny has been with us for years and she's worked out really great for us but it became apparently only over time that she does not read and that we are not in natural agreement on some topics. Now, I probably still would have hired her, but someone else may view it differently. I think it's important to think past the infant stage if you plan to keep them for more than a year or two.

"I really don't understand why, if you hired a nanny to care for your child, and complete agreed upon tasks such as the child's laundry and meal prep, never discussed her doing anything outside of that, how you can be miffed that she doesn't do it. If we agreed on tasks and a rate to go with it, why would you expect more than that? "

Because tons of moms hire a nanny as FTMs. They are exhausted and baby often is not sleeping tons/regularly. It's hard to anticipate just how much different the job will be over time as the baby grows. It is 100% reasonable to expect that the nanny help make herself helpful after taking a good hour-ish break to recharge. At my job if someone accmplished their work faster than expected but then proceeded to just sit around doing nothign they would be viewed as a bad employer and lazy, even if they were sharp at their work. A good employee includes having a good work ethic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: I'm sorry, OP. you have apparently never posted here before. this forum is part for answering questions but really mostly a chance for people to voice opinions. Best shot at that is a thread like this that gets "controversial".

To your question, I think questions about views on appropriate discipline, eating habits, outings are good. Also asking for specifics on HOW she works to incorporate learning through play. Also, if she is not from the US, I would ask her to read aloud in the interview. our nanny has been with us for years and she's worked out really great for us but it became apparently only over time that she does not read and that we are not in natural agreement on some topics. Now, I probably still would have hired her, but someone else may view it differently. I think it's important to think past the infant stage if you plan to keep them for more than a year or two.

"I really don't understand why, if you hired a nanny to care for your child, and complete agreed upon tasks such as the child's laundry and meal prep, never discussed her doing anything outside of that, how you can be miffed that she doesn't do it. If we agreed on tasks and a rate to go with it, why would you expect more than that? "

Because tons of moms hire a nanny as FTMs. They are exhausted and baby often is not sleeping tons/regularly. It's hard to anticipate just how much different the job will be over time as the baby grows. It is 100% reasonable to expect that the nanny help make herself helpful after taking a good hour-ish break to recharge. At my job if someone accmplished their work faster than expected but then proceeded to just sit around doing nothign they would be viewed as a bad employer and lazy, even if they were sharp at their work. A good employee includes having a good work ethic.

At your job, there are theoretically things to busy yourself with that relate to your job. My job is to care for children, and during nap time I complete tasks related to that job. I'm sure your boss would not expect you to do his/her laundry once you finished your work. This is how illogical it is to expect it of a nanny (if it was not originally part of her outlined duties). And for the love of all that is holy please do not say making your household run smoothly is her job. It's not. It's to care for your children. Maintaining your household is your job. She has her own household.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is 100% reasonable to expect that the nanny help make herself helpful after taking a good hour-ish break to recharge. At my job if someone accmplished their work faster than expected but then proceeded to just sit around doing nothign they would be viewed as a bad employer and lazy, even if they were sharp at their work. A good employee includes having a good work ethic.

If you finish your assignments at work, do you expect to fill your time by bringing coffee to all the executives, wiping down the toilet stalls in the bathroom, or vacuuming your boss' carpet? I didn't think so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is 100% reasonable to expect that the nanny help make herself helpful after taking a good hour-ish break to recharge. At my job if someone accmplished their work faster than expected but then proceeded to just sit around doing nothign they would be viewed as a bad employer and lazy, even if they were sharp at their work. A good employee includes having a good work ethic.

If you finish your assignments at work, do you expect to fill your time by bringing coffee to all the executives, wiping down the toilet stalls in the bathroom, or vacuuming your boss' carpet? I didn't think so.

Excellent points, 21:21.

[Anonymous]

OP the questions that are useful for MBs to ask are often the ones that less than stellar nannies hope you don't ask (hence the what do you during nap time questions freak out they are having).

In addition to the nap time/cleaning question, I would make sure to ask questions with follow up questions to hear specific examples rather than the basic we go to the library, go to the park type answers. I also have a good B.S. meter so if you someone is simply being pretentious by characterizing coloring as fine motor and visual spatial activities they are probably annoying.

Its important to ask about things that are important for your jobs. Our jobs don't really run past when we need to leave because DH or I could always continue on a conference call in the car or go back on-line in the evening so we didn't need someone available to stay past 5:30 on short notice. If you do bring it up. We did need someone who would be on time in the morning because her being late would substantially affect our commute time with traffic patterns. We were specific that being 10 minutes late in the morning would not work for this job.

For references, you really need to push past the desire for former MB to not say anything negative about the nanny they are trying to help find a job. No one is perfect and what may have been a little thing to that boss may be a big thing for the next employer. Push hard on what are her weakest areas, if you could change one thing type questions. Do not hire anyone who can not produce real and recent strong references (again the nannies on this board will screech at this because they tend to get fired or quit on bad terms a lot and expect you to hire them anyway).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do not hire anyone who can not produce real and recent strong references (again the nannies on this board will screech at this because they tend to get fired or quit on bad terms a lot and expect you to hire them anyway).

I don't think anyone here would legitimately say you should hire someone who can't produce these kinds of references? I have NEVER seen someone advocate for that. Stop hating on nannies, please.

-A nanny who has never quit or been fired, nor left on bad terms

[Anonymous]

I am lucky PP that our nanny sees her job as helping us out from time to time. So I do not ask her to sweep the floors but sometimes she does. I do not ask for laundry but she knows it is a huge huge help so she does it. As a result we have worked hard to keep her and are now at 5 yrs and counting with her.

[Anonymous]

That was to 20:51

[Anonymous]

Whenever there's an atmosphere of mutual respect, there are endless benefits for all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am lucky PP that our nanny sees her job as helping us out from time to time. So I do not ask her to sweep the floors but sometimes she does. I do not ask for laundry but she knows it is a huge huge help so she does it. As a result we have worked hard to keep her and are now at 5 yrs and counting with her.

I'm 20:51. I also do things like that for my boss, but they would never have the audacity to expect it. I take issue with an MB expecting a nanny to step outside of her assigned duties, job description, pay grade, or comfort zone, just because there is time to spare after completing her duties. It's lovely that your nanny does these things without being asked. However, the things that you named also do not take very long to accomplish. My charges can sleep as much as 4 hours in a day. During this time I do their laundry, organize the playroom, prepare their meals, and any other tasks relating to the kids. This takes no more than 45 minutes. I will then tidy up, organize the living areas, sweep and vacuum, and do dishes. Probably 30 minutes of work max. After my lunch, there is still plenty of unfilled time, and I think it's crazy to expect your nanny to fill that time with whatever tickles your fancy. If she's done the things she agreed to do at hiring, and you agreed to pay her to do, you can expect no more.