Do I have right expectations for our nanny?

[Anonymous]

We hired a nanny who is lovely and my 7 years old son has zero initiative/motivation to play anything. So nanny usually engages into baking (we don’t really need all these muffins, cookies…) and my son hangs around and is clearly bored. Beyond cooking, she prefers to drive him somewhere (a park, museum), but it coast so much money that we would like him to play home at 2-3 days at home. Can we expect her to come up with engaging activities, try new things, try to motivate him to play at home, so he gets involved into hands on projects?

[Anonymous]

Why don't you buy her the supplies or give a list of suggestions of things he'd enjoy? If you don't want her taking him out and you don't offer projects, what do you want them to do?

[Anonymous]

It sounds like she's trying- engaging in cooking/baking activities, going to parks, museums, etc. If there's something specific things you want him to be doing at home, you should clearly communicate that to her and provide her with any needed supplies.

[Anonymous]

I’d tell her no more baking ever and no car access other than for preapproved activities.. And that you expect her to do her job. JFC the standards are on the floor.

I assume the first two responses are not employers.

[Anonymous]

Why would a 7 yr old boy want to play with a grown woman? He wouldn't. Can you set up playdates for him? Tell him to come up with a list of things to do. Then the nanny and he can pick a few each day.

[Anonymous]

What does he enjoy doing with you when you are home with him? Start there and give the Nanny suggestion. I do think a Nanny should have initiative bif help her out a bit…..

[Anonymous]

It appears that your Nanny is taking great initiative to engage in activities w/your son.
She seems to have good ideas.

I think if your son does not want to engage w/her, then it is up to you at this point to talk to your son & encourage him to try new things w/her.
You may have to be creative and come up w/some ideas on your own since your Nanny has already done some.

Good luck to all of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why would a 7 yr old boy want to play with a grown woman? He wouldn't. Can you set up playdates for him? Tell him to come up with a list of things to do. Then the nanny and he can pick a few each day.

This. Sign him up for a class that she can take him to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We hired a nanny who is lovely and my 7 years old son has zero initiative/motivation to play anything. So nanny usually engages into baking (we don’t really need all these muffins, cookies…) and my son hangs around and is clearly bored. Beyond cooking, she prefers to drive him somewhere (a park, museum), but it coast so much money that we would like him to play home at 2-3 days at home. Can we expect her to come up with engaging activities, try new things, try to motivate him to play at home, so he gets involved into hands on projects?

Why does driving to a park cost a lot? Museums would, if you’re paying for parking, entrance fees, and food, but a park is easy. 7yo boys should be active outside after being inside all day at school, so a park is a great option for 2 hours everyday.

[Anonymous]

It is wild to expect that a nanny needs to entertain a 7 year old. He should be engaging in self directed play, going to activities, and playing with friends. What is wrong with you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is wild to expect that a nanny needs to entertain a 7 year old. He should be engaging in self directed play, going to activities, and playing with friends. What is wrong with you?

Right, how dare a nanny's employer expect the nanny to do her job! Well I never.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is wild to expect that a nanny needs to entertain a 7 year old. He should be engaging in self directed play, going to activities, and playing with friends. What is wrong with you?

Right, how dare a nanny's employer expect the nanny to do her job! Well I never.

A 7yo is not a 2yo. There should be different expectations for different ages, and the child is bored at home (parent's description). The nanny has been trying, clearly, but OP is objecting to what the nanny is doing (museums, baking, park). Give the kid some chores, assign daily reading and math work, make sure that they have card and board games (games that require math, reading, and spelling), and let her take him to the park everyday.