Nanny with an infant

[Anonymous]

We're considering a full time nanny candidate who has a 6 mo baby. For a number of reasons brining the baby to work is 100% not an option for us. If you ever employed someone with a small child of their own, did it work for you?

[Anonymous]

You said it's 100% not a an option so -

But to answer your question, I've known people that have done it & like so many things it depends on the persons involved. Similar aged children work the best & A 1:1 ratio would be ideal. Children like to socialize so that's in the + column.

You might have to pay for both classes for activities but the nanny gets paid less if she brings her child. It can be a win win for both families. Yes, your nanny is a human being with a family.
Since it's more difficult to find families who accept bringing a child the nanny might work harder to make the situation work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You said it's 100% not a an option so -

But to answer your question, I've known people that have done it & like so many things it depends on the persons involved. Similar aged children work the best & A 1:1 ratio would be ideal. Children like to socialize so that's in the + column.

You might have to pay for both classes for activities but the nanny gets paid less if she brings her child. It can be a win win for both families. Yes, your nanny is a human being with a family.
Since it's more difficult to find families who accept bringing a child the nanny might work harder to make the situation work.

Thank you for responding. I can see that scenario working if people click. My child is much older and has a complex medical diagnosis, has to be driven to appointments and therapies daily. Adding an infant to the mix doesnt compute…

[Anonymous]

So the 6 month old will have other childcare while the nanny works for you (daycare, family member, something else)?

If so - then NOT hiring her for this reason is illegal and horrible. Imagine if someone didn't want to hire you because you had a baby? Awful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You said it's 100% not a an option so -

But to answer your question, I've known people that have done it & like so many things it depends on the persons involved. Similar aged children work the best & A 1:1 ratio would be ideal. Children like to socialize so that's in the + column.

You might have to pay for both classes for activities but the nanny gets paid less if she brings her child. It can be a win win for both families. Yes, your nanny is a human being with a family.
Since it's more difficult to find families who accept bringing a child the nanny might work harder to make the situation work.

Thank you for responding. I can see that scenario working if people click. My child is much older and has a complex medical diagnosis, has to be driven to appointments and therapies daily. Adding an infant to the mix doesnt compute…

Probably not because even though an infant is surprisingly transportable if needed as they grow older, their life would be attending appointments & toddlers wouldn't be the best for this.

Is you child old enough that an older warm care giving type could do it? Sort of a companion? Youthful retiree? Or is your child still young enough for active care that's more than a pseudo grandparent?.

The situations I was referencing had in both families girls of similar ages who basically grew up as sisters. In a sense a delicate balance but the right mix was there. One family was single mom & single mom caregiver & the other family with this arrangement was more traditional. There was also a cultural component on both sides that you can't buy that the children will carry forward but again, it takes the right people.

[Anonymous]

I am paying my nanny to watch my child not to entertain her child. Regardless if it’s a playmate or not . I see Nannie’s wanting to not lower their rate but bringing their child is a benefit and taking time away from my child. Make it make sense?!

[Anonymous]

That's REALLY crappy of you, presumably as a working mom, to be discriminating against hiring another working mom. Yikes.

For me- OF COURSE I'd hire another mom to care for my kids. In fact, my preference is to hire other moms. They just get it.

[Anonymous]

Clearly a lot of people can’t read. OP is not asking if she should allow the nanny to bring her baby.

OP - your child was an infant before, correct? Did you lose your job because you became a mother?
I’m a nanny with two children (5 & 10) and can’t even imagine someone would not hire me because I am a mom. I’m in the same boat as every other mother in the earth - either nanny, doctor or astronaut. Mom is a mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's REALLY crappy of you, presumably as a working mom, to be discriminating against hiring another working mom. Yikes.

For me- OF COURSE I'd hire another mom to care for my kids. In fact, my preference is to hire other moms. They just get it.

OP is here. Zero personal experiences on how it can work in practical terms (other than brining the baby with). Got it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Clearly a lot of people can’t read. OP is not asking if she should allow the nanny to bring her baby.

OP - your child was an infant before, correct? Did you lose your job because you became a mother?
I’m a nanny with two children (5 & 10) and can’t even imagine someone would not hire me because I am a mom. I’m in the same boat as every other mother in the earth - either nanny, doctor or astronaut. Mom is a mom.

But it’s every mothers job to get their own child care lol

[Anonymous]

I'd keep looking. When her baby is sick, she'll either have to take time off or bring a sick baby around your kid. A six month old can't wait when they're crying. Her child is about to crawl/ then walk - you'll have to childproof your home for her baby, and she'll have to stop paying attention to yours to dash after hers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's REALLY crappy of you, presumably as a working mom, to be discriminating against hiring another working mom. Yikes.

For me- OF COURSE I'd hire another mom to care for my kids. In fact, my preference is to hire other moms. They just get it.

She can hire the woman but the woman needs to find child care. Most women do not bring their own kids to work with them and care for them while working.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's REALLY crappy of you, presumably as a working mom, to be discriminating against hiring another working mom. Yikes.

For me- OF COURSE I'd hire another mom to care for my kids. In fact, my preference is to hire other moms. They just get it.

OP is here. Zero personal experiences on how it can work in practical terms (other than brining the baby with). Got it.

What do you mean how can it work? Presumably the nanny will have childcare like every other working parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's REALLY crappy of you, presumably as a working mom, to be discriminating against hiring another working mom. Yikes.

For me- OF COURSE I'd hire another mom to care for my kids. In fact, my preference is to hire other moms. They just get it.

OP is here. Zero personal experiences on how it can work in practical terms (other than brining the baby with). Got it.

What do you mean how can it work? Presumably the nanny will have childcare like every other working parent.

What i mean is that babies sleep pretty poorly and sometimes unpredictably (teething, sleep regressions, congestion, constipation, and just mysterious baby sleep pattern that wears us all out...). Yes, she can arrange childcare during her working hours, but what happens if she is up most of the night and at 8 am she needs to drive my child on the beltway for 45 min for a medical appt? Then drive back, then drive somewhere else, and that's part of every weekday. This is what I am concerned about and she is a single mom.

For the holier than thou brigade: all my candidates are moms, so I will be employing a mom for sure in any scenario.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's REALLY crappy of you, presumably as a working mom, to be discriminating against hiring another working mom. Yikes.

For me- OF COURSE I'd hire another mom to care for my kids. In fact, my preference is to hire other moms. They just get it.

OP is here. Zero personal experiences on how it can work in practical terms (other than brining the baby with). Got it.

What do you mean how can it work? Presumably the nanny will have childcare like every other working parent.

What i mean is that babies sleep pretty poorly and sometimes unpredictably (teething, sleep regressions, congestion, constipation, and just mysterious baby sleep pattern that wears us all out...). Yes, she can arrange childcare during her working hours, but what happens if she is up most of the night and at 8 am she needs to drive my child on the beltway for 45 min for a medical appt? Then drive back, then drive somewhere else, and that's part of every weekday. This is what I am concerned about and she is a single mom.

For the holier than thou brigade: all my candidates are moms, so I will be employing a mom for sure in any scenario.

Trust your gut and be firm with all the candidates if you would not allow them to bring their kids to work with them. It's not unusual for nannies to assume that they can bring a school aged kid with them when the kid is sick or school is out or it's summer. And once you allow it once, it happens more and more often.