How much does your grocery bill go up when you get an AP?
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Anonymous
| How much do you budget for the additional cost of providing food for an au pair? I'm not referring to eating at restaurants or while on vacation, or money that you include as part of the AP's stipend. I'm talking about the weekly grocery bill - how much does it go up once you get an au pair? (I imagine this varies widely, but would appreciate some examples.) |
Anonymous
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With our current one, around $20 more a week. She likes certain fruits and snacks and we try to keep them stocked. It's not more than that b/c she eats out with her friends a lot.
One of our previous ones ate every meal with us and was a big eater. Hard to estimate but I'd say about 30 a week, with no special items. |
Anonymous
| Anywhere from $25-50. |
Anonymous
| 50-100 per week |
Anonymous
| Not sure but our's always wants Strawberrys out of season and that's expensive. So glad we're getting out of the program! |
Anonymous
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We always had more than enough foods (to the point they go bad all the time....)before we got our AP so I don't really feel the increase of grocery bill since she actually helped consuming the already too much foods.
However, the take outs definitely are more expensive for the extra person. Also, our AP likes eggs (2-3/day) and I only get free range organic ones so that adds up a bit. |
Anonymous
Our first AP always asked for gluten free stuff even though she had no gluten allergies and long fruit list. Our second always asked for fish, seafood, organic stuff and fruits. I feel like they are trying to eat health while there here but if you not the one paying the bill it’s easy to not think about how expensive some of these items can be. I remember one time I took out AP shopping and she picked up 2 dragon fruits and the cost $22. From then on I started just asking for shopping list. We also left the program and I am so happy we did. This program is not what it it’s advertised to be, for both the AP and the host families. APs think they are coming this extravagant vacation like experience with all expenses paid and HF think they will have a live baby sitter, they will have flexible childcare. What end up happening is that there is disappointment because the AP is not getting what they thought the came for and will either ask for more, become resentful or both and may try to rematch. HF may feel like they have taken up an added responsibility for young adult they have to cook for, sometimes clean after, worry about when she out late at night. Most HF feel the added cost to agency fees, car insurance, groceries, gas, phone… With that being said, I understand there are exceptions. |
Anonymous
Why didn't you just ... say "No, sorry - they're only in season in the summer. We can get you frozen strawberries if you want to use them in smoothies or something." |
Anonymous
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For those of you whose grocery bill only went up under 20 a week, how is that possible? Do your au pairs not eat with you much?
A couple servings of protein costs more than that, let alone a week's worth. For example, we now have to buy two rotisserie chickens instead of one, and that is the cheapest protein option that I can think of beyond eggs and beans. We had a beeflover from Argentina who was visibly crankier on days without meat during the height of the covid when beef prices skyrocketed. Our food bill went through the roof then and I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little relieved when her stint was done. Not saying I didn't appreciate having her around for help; on the contrary I am saying the higher food costs are worth it I guess but for me it sure wasn't under $50/week. |
Anonymous
Not the PP but yes, it would be perfectly reasonable to tell her that you’re not going to buy $7 out of season strawberries. But, this is where hosting an AP gets nuanced. At least in my experience, there’s so many times you have to pick your battles because you are walking a fine line between keeping her happy - since she’s caring for your kids and you don’t want to go into rematch - and bending over backwards to your detriment. Early on with my AP, she would’ve understood that strawberries are out of season and moved on. But then she got really plugged into the AP community and compared everything. I have no doubt my AP would’ve made pointed comments about the other APs whose families had fresh strawberries and made underhanded comments about how my family is cheap and “doesn’t care” about her because we don’t fulfill her grocery needs. I’m completely serious. |
Anonymous
| Ours doesn’t go up much (outside of takeout) but we are vegetarian so that probably helps. Like an PP we just always have a ton of food around so i can’t say I have noticed a specific price difference, particularly this year when everything is just so much more expensive across the board. Our au pairs also got cool and popular pretty fast and spend most weekends and some weeknights hanging out with friends and not eating with us. The only issue we have had is one au pair going overboard buying stuff from a speciality store from her country - it was all imported and $$ but in some cases we have the same thing here (like condensed milk) and she just didn’t realize. That was pretty easy to clear up though. |
Anonymous
| In our ~8 years of hosting it has ebbed and flowed a bit, noticed it go up when we had vegetarian APs because I tried to buy veggie burgers and other meat substitutes for them. If you are asking for budget purposes, I would probably say 25-30$ a week. Alternatively, depending on mealtime dynamics, you could give her a grocery allowance (maybe 40$?) so she could buy for herself. This is a case by case decision for us depending on whether she enjoys eating with us or views it as an obligation, which really just depends on personality. Either way is ok with us - going with the flow on non-safety/welfare matters is the only way to be a successful Host in my experience. |
Anonymous
This!! Only hosted one year and that was one year too much! Our AP was sweet and nice to my kids. But she was immature and lacking common sense and was not able to figure out her place in different situations and kept on crossing boundaries. Grateful for her help but extremely happy that we are done! |
Anonymous
I was in this battle with myself for an entire year and it was so tiring. I don't care about rematch because I was ready to switch to a nanny 3 months in and was careless about losing the program fee. But I never wanted to hurt anyone's feelings especially a young girl who is nice and sweet but just immature. I bent over backwards and tolerated this and completed the year. She had a great year but it was not worthy for me. |
Anonymous
| We have a big eater. She's gained weight. I would say $7-10 extra a day. She eats herself what my husband and I share. A big chicken breast, a big piece of salmon. Goes through a big tub of yogurt every 2 days. Thank goodness for Aldi's. Eats a half a tub of grape tomatoes at a time. We just keep buying more. She eats a half a freshly cut pineapple at a time. |