Appropriate parting bonus for long-time nanny?

[Anonymous]

We were blessed to have had the most amazing nanny for 9 years. We love her and the thought of parting with her makes me and our children very sad, but they are in school full time now and we can't afford to keep paying her full time.

She started with us as a part-time nanny / baby sitter 9 years ago, just for 3-4 of hours a day a couple of days a week when our oldest was a toddler; I don't work and didn't need full time, and she needed the flexibility because she had another part-time job (not with kids) that she liked at the time. We scaled her up to a full time position when we had our second child. When our youngest started preschool, we did a nanny share with another family who unfortunately no longer needs her.

I have been looking for part-time and full-time positions for her for 2 months now, but she has not found anything that she likes. Do I keep paying her if she turns down jobs because the rate or the new family is not to her liking?
Also, what is an appropriate monetary parting gift for that many years? She was with us part-time for 3 years, full-time for 4 years, and then the nanny share for the past couple of years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We were blessed to have had the most amazing nanny for 9 years. We love her and the thought of parting with her makes me and our children very sad, but they are in school full time now and we can't afford to keep paying her full time.

She started with us as a part-time nanny / baby sitter 9 years ago, just for 3-4 of hours a day a couple of days a week when our oldest was a toddler; I don't work and didn't need full time, and she needed the flexibility because she had another part-time job (not with kids) that she liked at the time. We scaled her up to a full time position when we had our second child. When our youngest started preschool, we did a nanny share with another family who unfortunately no longer needs her.

I have been looking for part-time and full-time positions for her for 2 months now, but she has not found anything that she likes. Do I keep paying her if she turns down jobs because the rate or the new family is not to her liking?
Also, what is an appropriate monetary parting gift for that many years? She was with us part-time for 3 years, full-time for 4 years, and then the nanny share for the past couple of years.

One week per year is generally regarded as the minimum. Given that you had part-time and nanny share for so long, I would suggest 4.5 weeks at the full time rate.

Set an end date now, maximum of a month out. Please, provide a reference letter and take any reference calls. But it is not your job to find her next position, especially if you've found several and she's found issues with each.

[Anonymous]

Nine years? I would give her six months but you're already pleading poverty, so the minimum you should give is three months. She gave you peace of mind for nine years. Truthfully, no amount of money can ever repay her.

[Anonymous]

oh for goodness sake. that is so stupid, to offer like what, 3 month pay, about 15k? Who got that kind of money for a bonus? Just give her 1K op, and provide great reference! She will find a new job in no time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nine years? I would give her six months but you're already pleading poverty, so the minimum you should give is three months. She gave you peace of mind for nine years. Truthfully, no amount of money can ever repay her.

New Poster (NP) Here:

To the PP above >> Exactly HOW is the OP “pleading poverty??!”
I think that is an unfair statement….

OP, I think it is wonderful that you are helping your Nanny find + secure a new position.
Like another poster stated - you really do not have to but I think it is great that you are doing so.

I would just write her a glowing letter of reference as well as agree to also be a phone reference as well!

I think you should just pay her what you can reasonably afford to.

Your Nanny sounds fabulous so I am sure whatever you offer her will be fine.

[Anonymous]

I think 1k to 2k is a great bonus. Just set an end date and do t worry if she has a job or not, she’ll figure it out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think 1k to 2k is a great bonus. Just set an end date and do t worry if she has a job or not, she’ll figure it out.

$2000 for nine years? This is an insult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think 1k to 2k is a great bonus. Just set an end date and do t worry if she has a job or not, she’ll figure it out.

$2000 for nine years? This is an insult.

Oh? I didn’t realize. I left one job after seven years and didn’t get any “bonus”. I’m leaving another job after five years and there’s no bonus. These are corporate jobs tho. Like how would employers know that a bonus is required for a nanny and how much said bonus would be? What other jobs give a bonus when you leave? Not teachers, nurses, doctors, lawyers, waitresses, dental hygienists… like all these professions give performance based bonuses during employment but this is different. I didn’t mean to insult anyone but this is the first I’ve heard to give a bonus to an employee who is leaving…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think 1k to 2k is a great bonus. Just set an end date and do t worry if she has a job or not, she’ll figure it out.

$2000 for nine years? This is an insult.

Oh? I didn’t realize. I left one job after seven years and didn’t get any “bonus”. I’m leaving another job after five years and there’s no bonus. These are corporate jobs tho. Like how would employers know that a bonus is required for a nanny and how much said bonus would be? What other jobs give a bonus when you leave? Not teachers, nurses, doctors, lawyers, waitresses, dental hygienists… like all these professions give performance based bonuses during employment but this is different. I didn’t mean to insult anyone but this is the first I’ve heard to give a bonus to an employee who is leaving…

+1
I agree w/the above.
And I AM a Nanny too.

[Anonymous]

People have to be trolls On here because there is no way that they are actually expecting a bonus like that. I personally would be happy with a letter of reference and depending on the families situation a month max pay would be great. But I’m also very happy with anything I get and don’t expect anything.

[Anonymous]

To me they gave me 4 weeks paid after working for them for 4 years. To my friend this gay couple gave her every year 3 weeks bonus plus paid vacations. To an another friend they gave her 1 week bonus after working 3 years. The last one is the worst one. She saw the mom buying tons of boots and can't give bonuses to nanny or buy clothes for her daughter. They were religious family. The worst ones are religious or fake religious people.

[Anonymous]

My employers knew I wanted to travel abroad so they gave me one months pay and used their miles to book me flights and I traveled for a full month! This was 15 years ago and still the best thing anyone has ever done for me. I was with them 7 years before they outgrew the need for a full time nanny.