So anxious. Need to have the "we don't need you this fall" discussion.

[Anonymous]

This afternoon we'll be telling our nanny of four years that we won't be needing her services this fall. It won't come as a surprise that our son will be going to preschool which we've been talking openly about, but may come as a surprise that we've decided to send our 2YO DD to all day prek as well. We really love her, she's done an amazing job, and I know these relationships eventually come to an end. We wanted to give her as much notice as possible (understanding she could leave--but we want to be fair), we plan to pay her four weeks beyond when we part ways (so basically a week of pay for each year of service, we just can't afford a lump sum bonus), and we will do everything to put out stellar references to help her secure another job.

I just feel awful about it though. Any ways you'd recommend having the conversation, things to say? Any things I'm missing or forgetting to consider?

[Anonymous]

Want to talk to you

Really appreciate all you’ve done for the kids

Job will be ending in September

We will give you severance

Will post for you

Understand this may be a surprise

Do you have any questions?

Why don’t you take the rest of the afternoon off

Have a great weekend

Exhale

[Anonymous]

All nannies know the job will end. It’s the nature of the profession. Just keep nanny in your kids lives by letting her visit or date night babysit for your kids sakes

[Anonymous]

Nannies know it comes a time when the job will end
You’re handle the situation the right way giving her enough time plus four week pay
An excellent reference don’t worry she will stay to the end.
You’re very fair

[Anonymous]

Include her in the discussion. Ask if she's helped transition toddlers to full day prek before, and see if she's open to staying up to three weeks into september to help soften this.

[Anonymous]

Nanny here. You are doing it great. Sadly most of nannies know that is common that kids start school on September when parents are ready to send them full day at pre-k. She will understand and grateful for the bonus.

[Anonymous]

Present her with an amazing letter of recommendation at the end of the talk

[Anonymous]

Nanny here as well. It does hurt and we never get use to
seeing the kids grow and blossom. I can't explain it something like mourning but no death. I'm going through a similar situation and decided to leave a couple weeks early. Everyone cried as it came a shock. Yes kids will be attending kindergarten but you have to give her more than ample time to find another job.

[Anonymous]

Don't be surprised if she's offered a great opportunity that starts in July.

[Anonymous]

I am in the same boat as OP so this is really helpful. For others who have broached the conversation, do you just jump into it knowing that they will be caught off guard? Or would you maybe give the nanny a heads up note in advance? LIke, we wanted to talk to you about next fall or something like that so she's not so surprised?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This afternoon we'll be telling our nanny of four years that we won't be needing her services this fall. It won't come as a surprise that our son will be going to preschool which we've been talking openly about, but may come as a surprise that we've decided to send our 2YO DD to all day prek as well. We really love her, she's done an amazing job, and I know these relationships eventually come to an end. We wanted to give her as much notice as possible (understanding she could leave--but we want to be fair), we plan to pay her four weeks beyond when we part ways (so basically a week of pay for each year of service, we just can't afford a lump sum bonus), and we will do everything to put out stellar references to help her secure another job.

I just feel awful about it though. Any ways you'd recommend having the conversation, things to say? Any things I'm missing or forgetting to consider?

Jobs end but do not tell her that she can babysit for you. This is insulting.

[Anonymous]

Just be honest and do it as soon as possible.

Maybe end with a nice gift like extended payment if she’s worth it.

[Anonymous]

Former nanny here. Tell her as soon as possible, preferably now.

Always be a good reference for her, give her a good letter of recommendation.
Be flexible with your hours as she interviews for new jobs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This afternoon we'll be telling our nanny of four years that we won't be needing her services this fall. It won't come as a surprise that our son will be going to preschool which we've been talking openly about, but may come as a surprise that we've decided to send our 2YO DD to all day prek as well. We really love her, she's done an amazing job, and I know these relationships eventually come to an end. We wanted to give her as much notice as possible (understanding she could leave--but we want to be fair), we plan to pay her four weeks beyond when we part ways (so basically a week of pay for each year of service, we just can't afford a lump sum bonus), and we will do everything to put out stellar references to help her secure another job.

I just feel awful about it though. Any ways you'd recommend having the conversation, things to say? Any things I'm missing or forgetting to consider?

Jobs end but do not tell her that she can babysit for you. This is insulting.

It's not insulting if she phrases it as "We know how much DC love you, and we want you to remain a part of their lives, if you also want that. Would you be open to date night sitting, scheduled phone calls or weekend day outings, whenever your schedule permits?"

[Anonymous]

“All day pre-k”. So daycare?