Help me raise this...
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Anonymous
| Our after school sitter has been sick (stomach bug) three times in the past month. She said the urgent care told her the last time it was Norovirus. This week I came home and she didn’t look great. She said she was feeling sick so I said she should go. A few minutes after she left she came back in and said she had thrown up in her car. I went out to help and it was ALL over the car, her coat, wallet, etc. She wiped it up with paper towels and went home. I offered to help clean while she rested but she said no. I’m 95% sure she didn’t go back and clean it later or wash her coat or disinfect anything. I have young kids who ride in her car and one has special needs which make throwing up even worse than it normally is for kids. I’m panicked about my kids and DH and I getting it. Yes, I know we could pick up a bug anywhere but it’s more likely when they will be sitting on uncleaned vomit and she’ll be putting purse/coat etc on our table after only wiping off the vomit with a paper towel. Please don’t flame me DCUM - I really need help figuring out how to ask her to clean her car and wash her coat or even better let me or DH help. I’m also wondering now if she keeps re-infecting herself bc she’s not cleaning properly after she gets sick? It seems unlikely to get 3 separate stomach bugs in one month? Please be kind. Even if you’d be okay with this, our DS’s special needs complicate things and it’s really very hard. I know we can’t avoid illnesses altogether but I also don’t want to knowingly expose them. Any ideas DCUM? |
Anonymous
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You’re absolutely right to be concerned . A nice way around this is say , “I’m worried about our son because his immune system isn’t as strong as other kids. Can I please pay to get your car and coat professionally cleaned ? It would just make me feel a lot better even if it seems crazy !”
Then you sort of make it into a “you not her” issue. |
Anonymous
| Maybe you could offer to pay to have her car detailed. It was very generous on your part to offer to help her clean it up in the first place. She is an adult and should clean it herself. |
Anonymous
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Explain to her what you said here, that obviously you are trying to avoid having your family get sick and that it would be harder on your special needs DS, etc.
Tell her you are worried that she's been sick so often in such a short time and want to make sure she is taking care of herself. Maybe suggest that she Lysol her place, change her toothbrush, sanitize her cell phone, wash her winter coat, etc. With these concerns in mind, say that she can't come back to work until she has a doctor's note that she is no longer contagious, and that she also must have her car cleaned (you should probably offer to pay for this) before driving your children to avoid spreading any illness. How long have you had this sitter, and has illness been an issue in the past? |
Anonymous
| Op here - Thanks all. She has worked with our family for the school year and only recently does this recurring stomach bug seem to be a problem. I thought about offering to pay to get the car detailed, but then I wasn’t sure that would actually sanitize it as much as just vacuum and clean it? I don’t think I need a dr note, i’m sure she will be feeling fine by next week. It’s more the issue of sanitizing things like the car, the coat, etc. that have vomit on them and could transmit illness. Stomach bugs are so contagious! Can someone help me with language to say we need to deep clean the items? I know she is an adult and I really don’t want to offend her, but I am super freaked out about the idea of vomit on items coming into our house or the kids touching it in the car. |
Anonymous
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Can you look into a place that details cars and sanitizes?
I'd say something to the affect that you know she hasn't been feeling well so you got her a gift card for a full detail so she doesn't have the added stress of sanitizing her vehicle. |
Anonymous
| How can you be sure that she did not clean her car,?? I would te you where to go and quit. She probably got big from you and your kids. |
Anonymous
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I'd just be honest with her--you've noticed she's been sick three times in the last month with the same thing and it could be because she's coming in contact with contaminated things like the car, purse, toothbrush etc. and offer to pay to clean/replace them. Reiterate how miserable it is to be sick, and even more so for your SN child.
Several years ago I went through a similar thing where I was getting sick at frequent intervals and finally realized I was touching/using germy things like my toothbrush, pillows/bedding etc and changed out/washed in hot water/lysol sprayed everything and finally kicked the bug. She may not have made the connection that this is why she's sick so much. It's OK to be honest! She needs to hear it and it will help her to feel better!! |
Anonymous
| Maybe suggest she takes a pregnancy test |
Anonymous
Maybe the sitter should suggest that she mind her own business. |
Anonymous
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If your sitter has had Noro three times in one month there could be something else going on.
She would have brought it into your house already. It sheds in the stool for 2 weeks. So she poops in your house, she’s depositing the virus into your bathroom. Sorry op. |
Anonymous
| Op again - no I’m not asking if she’s pregnant. Don’t worry. And no she didn’t get it from us (not that it would matter if she did). I’m not a total a$$hole for the troll folks above. I am concerned about her and about the kids. For the person who said she’s shedding the virus, I’m not so worried about that. More about my kids actually sitting on uncleaned vomit and about things like coats and purses with vomit on the table, kitchen counter, etc. |
Anonymous
Honestly if you think she's not intelligent enough to clean up her car after vomiting maybe you should find another nanny. |