After years of being a nanny, I had a nanny come over today for the first time. I am in my mid 20s with a 3 year old and 10 month old. I recently split with their father who I was engaged to. He is trying to hire some 8.50 an hour nanny who he hooked up with recently but doesn't hook up with anymore. That's one problem, but not one I can really control. I have the kids the other 4 days a week and need a nanny to get my masters coursework done online. Anyway, my nanny is $17 an hour which for my area (not in DC or anywhere close) is reasonable. She is 17 but graduated school. Anyway, she was supposed to stop by for a meet and greet (informal interview since its only 2-3 hours a week) but she asked 5 minutes beforehand if she could come 2 hours late. I said it's ok, we will just see you tomorrow. So today comes, she is 7 minutes late. Now for me, as a nanny, I would have arrived much earlier. She is looking for full time work and I let her know I can be a reference if she does find a m-f job and that she can help on a saturday or sunday instead if she wants to stay. Because I do realize a short job like this is not the best. Anyway, during the time she was here, she was very friendly, but I noticed she spent a lot of time focusing on the baby rather than mu 3 year old who was really excited about her. So much so, that my 3 year old did not make it to the potty on time. I let her know she needs reminders still. During this time, she sat next to my son while he ate (I pre prepared the meals for the kids) and just watched as i changed my daughter, cleaned up the mess, etc even though I had set out extra clothes for her in case this happened. While missing my online class. My daughter probably busted through my door 7 times. I know it's hard, but I mean she just sat with my son for a whole hour for lunch. His shirt was wet and dirty from lunch but she only changed his diaper. She left the mess on the high chair and did not clean away my daughters plate. I guess I just did the most when I was a nanny, or is this typical? She didnt clean up the toys either. I wish I could hire someone with more experience, but I am paying for this with my student loans. She was very sweet and my daughter liked her. I guess I am just wondering if I should let it go since it is such a short job. Also, she lives down the street and has other 2 hour jobs in the area. |
OMG, learn to write in paragraphs! |
Gahh sorry, I'm on my phone. It was showing paragraphs but did not happen once I posted |
2-3 hours per work?
Schedule her while the baby is sleeping and have her just play with your 3yo. |
The hard part about a young nanny is that she likely doesn’t know what to be doing and how to best manage the kids.
The good part about a young nanny is that she is likely very receptive to training! This is more work for you, but will be worth it. You should leave detailed instructions and be very up front in person - “Please sit at the table while the kids eat for 20 minutes. If (girl) finishes eating early then please play a board game with her at the table for that shelf. When the kids are all done eating, please wash their hands and faces at the sink, clean up the dishes and change the baby’s clothes. Next play a game with (girl) while baby has independent play.” Etc etc |
she should learn to write a coherent sentence first. |
OP, Ignore today’s “Grammar Police.”
I read your entire post & didn’t have an issue w/comprehension. Anyway, seventeen is quite young to expect an authentic, professional Nanny. At her age, her personal experience w/young children is very limited. As well as Nanny jobs. She should automatically KNOW that A.)She needs to care + bond w/both of your children if this is to work. She absolutely cannot favor one child over the other. Also B.)It is common sense that while caring for other’s children in their own home, one needs to always clean up after meals, wash any dishes/bottles used during her shift plus straighten up the toys/books/puzzles, etc. If you are paying her $17/Hr. then she should be offering more personally. I would find someone else. |
She is only 17, I have hired a teen sitter for my one kid and they don't get the house stuff the way an older person would.
I think you need to be specific about what is important to you and let the other stuff go. If she is only there for 2-3 hours have it not be at a meal time for example. |
A 17-yr old is a babysitter not a nanny! |
The kid is 17. You shouldn't expect her to be a nanny. She also has no experience. I am shocked that you expected much of her at all. |
It is very hard to fill a position for 2-3 hours. There is a learning curve at most jobs, including this one. For example, you should let her know up front that your three year old needs reminders to use the bathroom. You also said you set out extra clothes for your son, but did you tell her that? She may not have known you wanted his clothes changed. I would be very explicit about your expectations (like please change the baby's outfit after lunch or if he is dirty; or please clean up the toys while the baby naps, etc.).
It's also very difficult to engage a baby and a 3-year-old. I would show her how you handle doing that and ask her to try to do that as well. But just know it likely won't work as well since neither the baby or three year old are familiar with your babysitter yet. Let the rest go. I agree its a red flag to come late; but you agreed to interview her late and hired her when she was 7 minutes late. Why dwell on it now? |
I would not expect a 17yo to be a good nanny yet. I would view this as a mother’s helper situation and train the heck out of her (assuming she is willing to learn and you are willing to put in the time).
For 2-3 hours, I have found that even professional nannies often see it as more of a babysitting gig with fewer expectations, regardless of rate or what they normally do for their full time families. Only one has been good about cleaning up; the rest generally leave food/dishes wherever they stopped eating and I am lucky if the used bottles make their way into the sink, much less the dishwasher. |
Wow. You really aren’t making smart decisions in life, other than grad school. You hired a child... what are you even asking? Would a professional nanny handle things differently? Absolutely. Would a professional nanny work for $17/hr, even if they did have a few hours to spare? Not a chance. You also hired her before you even met her? I don’t know what to tell you... start making better choices and choosing to have people in your life that also make good choices. Or don’t; it makes no difference to anyone but you and your children. |
You realize that in some parts of the country $17 is a good rate, right? Not everyone lives in DC, LA or SF. |
At 17 you’re a sitter. |