How to fire a long-term nanny in the nicest possible way

[Anonymous]

We are letting our nanny go after working with her for 3 1/2 years. She watched our first until preschool and now our second through her first year of life. However, we have never been thrilled with the nanny. Communication is poor and she was just not good as the kids got older. She doesn't have the skills or energy to handle toddlers. Now that my youngest DD is walking and needs more engagement, we have interviewed and plan to hire a new nanny who we hope will be a better fit for us. How should we break this news to our current nanny? We plan to give her severance and plenty of advance notice, but how do we tell her that we're moving on to a new nanny? I honestly don't think she's very employable for a number of reasons, so we can't even really offer to help her find a new job. She's also old and I think she probably hoped to work with us for another couple years before retiring, so this might be the end of her career. I feel awful but it's what's best for our family. Any advice appreciated. Also advice on the size of the severance. Thanks so much.

[Anonymous]

I think you just need to be honest with her. Maybe you can have her do some sitting on a Saturday night. Can she collect unemployment? Maybe help her fill out the paperwork for collecting unemployment. I would give her 3 weeks severance.

[Anonymous]

You're firing her. I don't give severance to people fired FOR CAUSE.

Just give her a week's bonus if you're that inclined. Tell her two weeks before, and tell her you'll give her the week's bonus if she completes the two weeks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You're firing her. I don't give severance to people fired FOR CAUSE.

Just give her a week's bonus if you're that inclined. Tell her two weeks before, and tell her you'll give her the week's bonus if she completes the two weeks.

But OP is clearly a better person than you, so hopefully she does not consider this advice at all! Sometimes you hire someone that is great with babies, but has a harder time keeping up with toddlers. It does not mean that the nanny did anything wrong, if anything the OP made a bad decision hiring an older person without the forethought to consider two children, especially toddlers.

OP, it is customary to give one week per year worked. I would bump up to 4 week’s pay if you can, especially knowing that she will have a difficult time finding a new job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're firing her. I don't give severance to people fired FOR CAUSE.

Just give her a week's bonus if you're that inclined. Tell her two weeks before, and tell her you'll give her the week's bonus if she completes the two weeks.

But OP is clearly a better person than you, so hopefully she does not consider this advice at all! Sometimes you hire someone that is great with babies, but has a harder time keeping up with toddlers. It does not mean that the nanny did anything wrong, if anything the OP made a bad decision hiring an older person without the forethought to consider two children, especially toddlers.

OP, it is customary to give one week per year worked. I would bump up to 4 week’s pay if you can, especially knowing that she will have a difficult time finding a new job.

I don't think OP is a better person than me. I think she's a bad manager and a weaker person than I am. You're encouraging her to be a sucker. A week per year worked would be appropriate if OP didn't need childcare anymore and THAT was the reason for eliminating the position. This is not the case here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're firing her. I don't give severance to people fired FOR CAUSE.

Just give her a week's bonus if you're that inclined. Tell her two weeks before, and tell her you'll give her the week's bonus if she completes the two weeks.

But OP is clearly a better person than you, so hopefully she does not consider this advice at all! Sometimes you hire someone that is great with babies, but has a harder time keeping up with toddlers. It does not mean that the nanny did anything wrong, if anything the OP made a bad decision hiring an older person without the forethought to consider two children, especially toddlers.

OP, it is customary to give one week per year worked. I would bump up to 4 week’s pay if you can, especially knowing that she will have a difficult time finding a new job.

Agree. - new poster here

[Anonymous]

ask your husband to do it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're firing her. I don't give severance to people fired FOR CAUSE.

Just give her a week's bonus if you're that inclined. Tell her two weeks before, and tell her you'll give her the week's bonus if she completes the two weeks.

But OP is clearly a better person than you, so hopefully she does not consider this advice at all! Sometimes you hire someone that is great with babies, but has a harder time keeping up with toddlers. It does not mean that the nanny did anything wrong, if anything the OP made a bad decision hiring an older person without the forethought to consider two children, especially toddlers.

OP, it is customary to give one week per year worked. I would bump up to 4 week’s pay if you can, especially knowing that she will have a difficult time finding a new job.

I don't think OP is a better person than me. I think she's a bad manager and a weaker person than I am. You're encouraging her to be a sucker. A week per year worked would be appropriate if OP didn't need childcare anymore and THAT was the reason for eliminating the position. This is not the case here.

She is not being fired for cause. The job is expanding beyond the nanny’s capability. There is actually a huge difference.