Au Pair Schedule while I am on Maternity Leave

[Anonymous]

Hi,

We are a first time host family and hosting a new AP when our third child is born in the Fall. Our two oldest are 5yo and 2 yo. I am wondering if anyone can provide a sample schedule or list of things for the AP to do while I am on maternity leave. The oldest will be in Kindergarten all day pretty much and our 2 yo will be in preschool 3-4 days a week for half days.

I figured for the first three months, our AP can help get into a routine with the baby and get acclimated to the environment and the kids. Also, it seems it will be nice to have an extra set of hands around the house to give me a break. However, once the baby is three months, our AP will be able to watch the baby on her own. So I am wondering what kind of schedule I should have for her for the last 3 months of my maternity leave before I go back to work (I get 6 months off). Should I mimic a schedule of what it will look like when I return to work?

Any advice or willing to share a sample schedule for an AP while you were home? Is anyone also willing to share their handbook that is geared towards infant care and/or 3 kids?

Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Well, it's not going to be easy so you are right to ask these questions before she arrives.

It's not a fun job to work with a mother or father working from home, but in your case you'll be on maternity leave so it's even worse ...
Everybody will need boudaries and you can make this experience a success.

If I were you I'd make her responsible for the 2 older children from the beginning. And when they're in school, ask her to be in charge of the baby so you can get a break. Go out, run some errands, go to the gym, see a friend.
Get any chance to get out of the house. You'll feel better and she will enjoy being on her own as well.
It won't work out if you're always there monitoring what she does.

Good luck

[Anonymous]

Thank you for the advice! Yes I definitely agree with you that I don't want to be around and making her feel like I am watching her like a hawk. Not my intention at all, but I can see an AP feeling like that.

[Anonymous]

Our 2nd AP was with us for 3 months before our 3rd was born. Older sibs were 3 and 1, oldest was in preschool a few half-days each week. It was HEAVEN having her around.

Her normal schedule was 7-4 prior to baby and I made no changes to that. I could sleep in and snuggle with baby while she got the littles up for the day and off to school. I would play with them but always make it clear that AP was in charge and they had to listen to her. I would maybe make lunch while she picked up the oldest from school, then we would eat together and the older two would nap at the end of her shift. The baby was always with me. I went back to work after 3 months so as that came to an end I started to have AP take more time with the baby while I was still at the house, then balance all 3 of them. When I went back to work I hired a neighborhood high schooler to help out AP a few hours a week but really she didn't need it. She was such a rock star.

I know people say it's hard to nanny while mom or dad is home, but we do it all the time and it works out great. Even last week we had AP scheduled for a few hours on the 4th and 5th while we were off work and at home and it went fantastic. I think you need to have a good relationship with the AP, and make sure the kids know to respect AP even when you're around.

[Anonymous]

I was in a similar situation a few months ago. What I did was a split schedule, because my other two kids (twins) were in preschool and I did the night feedings. She did the first morning feeding so I could catch up on sleep while DH was getting the kids ready to school. In the afternoon she picked up the kids from school and took them to playground/library while I was with the baby and getting diner ready. Our scheduled looked something like this:

Mondays, Wednesdays:7am-9am & 3pm-730pm
Tuesdays, Thursdays: 7am-9am & 1pm-730pm
Fridays: 7am-9am & 1pm-6pm
Almost no weekends.

Then two weeks before I went back to work I changed the schedule to be 8-5pm.
It was really important to have a flexible AP, we had many iteration of the schedule and this was the last iteration we both liked.
In the AM she took care a baby and cleaned up after the kids.
In the afternoon she entertained the kids while I got diner ready. The days she started at 1pm, I got to go to the gym. She also did all the 3 kids laundry.

BTW, we never had any issue with me being home. Because I did no interfere unless she had a question. I was happy to be away and let her deal with the baby because I trusted her.

Good luck!