Is this an AP Dedicated car?

[Anonymous]

We currently have an AP and she uses our second car. We live close to transportation and barely use cars. But she use it to pick up the kids and take them to play. She also uses it for personal errands but usually not too far. She uses the car like 95% of the time. My husband and I also use it randomly (maybe twice a week) to run quick errand when it is available (it is a smaller car, easy to park). We always put gas. AP has to ask to take the car out of town and she need to put gas in that case. Is this still a dedicated AP car? or "dedicated car" means she can do whatever she wants with the car, no question asked and we put gas no question asked? I am asking because I will soon be looking for a new AP and I want to accurately describe the car situation.
Thanks

[Anonymous]

If she is using the car for personal use, then she should pay for the gas. If she has the children with her, then you should fill the tank.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If she is using the car for personal use, then she should pay for the gas. If she has the children with her, then you should fill the tank.

Thanks but that was not my question, I was just wondering if I can advertise the car as AP Dedicated Car.

[Anonymous]

No.

If you say "dedicated," then you might get an AP with attitude when you take the car for an errand.

Also, we do not let APs drive the kids around in the "dedicated" car. The "dedicated" car is for their personal use only, therefore they have to fill up the tank all the time. No figuring out who is responsible for gas.

[Anonymous]

I you would never take the car unless it's truly available (like, AP is out of town or in class or something), I think I would say, "car available for AP at all times" or something like that. Since you also use it, you wouldn't want her to, say, fill up the back seat with her boyfriend;s junk and leave it there for two weeks, something you wouldn't even know about with a dedicated car.

[Anonymous]

Just be clear about the situation, don't rely on a phrase that you've thought hard about but may not mean the same to her, especially if English isn't her native language.

Something like "There is a car available for the AP to use" should work, and you can talk about it in more detail if you get to that stage.

[Anonymous]

I would say "we have a 2nd car available for AP's use"

We do have a 3rd car that is primarily for AP, but she still has to ask to use it.
It is a privilege, not a right, and I wouldn't want any AP who would reject us solely for no dedicated car.
I hate entitled APs.
-7 year host mom

[Anonymous]

No, it’s not a dedicated car. There are three drivers sharing two cars.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would say "we have a 2nd car available for AP's use"

We do have a 3rd car that is primarily for AP, but she still has to ask to use it.
It is a privilege, not a right, and I wouldn't want any AP who would reject us solely for no dedicated car.
I hate entitled APs.
-7 year host mom

+1. This is how we describe it too.

[Anonymous]

We say that we have a dedicated car. She uses our second car exclusively. We fill her tank (hybrid) twice a month. Still, the car has to be in by midnight and she needs permission if she wants to go over 100 miles.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would say "we have a 2nd car available for AP's use"

We do have a 3rd car that is primarily for AP, but she still has to ask to use it.

This is how frame it. I don't expect APs to "ask" to use it but we do negotiate use.

[Anonymous]

OP here, thanks all, these answer my question!

[Anonymous]

Depends how you see it. Is the AP allowed to take the car whenever she's off, anywhere she wants to go? Dedicated au pair car.

Do you have limits on when/where? Then it's a car she can use.

We have a 3rd car but do not advertise it as "hers". We say she can use it for local trips but has to tell us when she's going anywhere other than the usual (i.e. not at the gym, a friends house, starbucks, target, etc.) That way we can say no when she asks to take it to Baltimore for an overnight...just as an example.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends how you see it. Is the AP allowed to take the car whenever she's off, anywhere she wants to go? Dedicated au pair car.

Do you have limits on when/where? Then it's a car she can use.

We have a 3rd car but do not advertise it as "hers". We say she can use it for local trips but has to tell us when she's going anywhere other than the usual (i.e. not at the gym, a friends house, starbucks, target, etc.) That way we can say no when she asks to take it to Baltimore for an overnight...just as an example.

Sharing does not equal dedicated, but if you have a third car that you don't drive, you have a dedicated AP car with limits. We had such a car but with limits on distance and DC driving. We reimbursed gas related to the kids' activities but did not pay for her personal gas.

[Anonymous]

I think you got it by now op - ap does not have a dedicated car.
Our ap has their own car but it has rules/car curfew.
I have not been in that car more than 3 times in last 2 years.