Was I In The Right (Or Wrong) Here?

[Anonymous]

A family I babysit for on occasion (about every 2-3 wks.), has told me they will no longer be calling me to babysit.
This after five years!!

Last Friday night, I was scheduled to babysit 4-9:30PM.
Then at 9, the MB texted me and asked if I could spend the night.
She is recently single and has a new “friend” that she wanted to spend the night with.
I didn’t have my toothbrush, P.J.s, etc. and had to work early the next morning at 8:45AM.
She acknowledged it was spur of the moment and promised me she would pay me good money if I stayed until 8AM the next morning.

Well I really needed the ca$h since my car had just broken down.
I stayed until 8AM the next morning, but she still had not arrived.
I had to work so I had to leave and she said she was on her way home so it was okay and she would send me a check.
I agreed and she ended up sending me fifty dollar$ for 10PM (when child went to sleep) - 8AM when I had to leave.
I texted her that even though I do charge flat rates for overnights, five dollars an hr. is not “good money” in my opinion and requested that they no longer ask me to do overnights again.

Then she told me that they won’t be using me anymore.

It’s not about losing income.....
It is about not burning bridges with my clients.
I have to stand up for myself because no one else ever will.

[Anonymous]

The next time a family requests something like this, send your rate along with your answer. I agree that $50 isn’t “good money” for a last minute overnight, but you have more to lose by not setting a rate!

[Anonymous]

She's really selfish. Before you know it, she'll be begging you to come back. Just watch.

[Anonymous]

I agree with what the first post said. Next time, give them a flat rate for over night. And I would suggest to not accept if you have work the next morning since people can be unreliable. Also, ask her if she’s bothered that you thought $50 was unacceptable. We have to value ourselves if not others won’t. With your experience, im sure you can find another family. Good thing that you spoke up about the $50 too.

[Anonymous]

ALWAYS agree on a rate up front.
Always, always always. So many stories with the same issue.
Haven't you all learned this by now?

[Anonymous]

Shitty on her part. But, she’s an irresponsible parent on so many levels, so I’m not surprised.

But, I agree that you should have said no, especially since you had to work the next day. In the future, set your rate ahead of time. And if you ever get suckered into working for this woman again, insists on up-front payment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's really selfish. Before you know it, she'll be begging you to come back. Just watch.

I strongly doubt this, but my friends have told me that they think she will.

If that is the case, I will respectfully decline.

[Anonymous]

You were absolutely not in the wrong, OP. What a messed up bitch!

[Anonymous]

It was low-ball pay.

It was a snarky way to respond to it.

There is no "wrong" here, really. You didn't tell her how much you wanted, her idea of "good" pay is not yours, and you responded with your real emotions, which is always ok. It also sounds like neither of you feels good about the other anymore, so ending the working relationship sounds like the best outcome anyway.

As everyone here has said, there was a much better way to deal with this. When she texted, you should have said "no," or, "ok; that will be $125 for the overnight, please confirm." Then when she replies with something mean or unhappy, you can know you were 100% in the right. But possibly she just responds with, "Oh! too much! I'll be home soon." Or, "OK! Thanks! See you in the morning."

The second better way was to send a more professional text that said, "I should have clarified last night, but my overnight rate is significantly more than you paid. I charge x$$ for overnights. If that won't work for you, I understand, but I need it to be worth it for me to be away from home." Or something else less aggressive.

[Anonymous]

I’m upfront with babysitting parents from the beginning, but I’m also super flexible with hours. When I meet them, I give my hourly and overnight rates, and I explain what an overnight rate is TO ME (midnight switches to overnight rate, 6 am switches back to hourly, anything after midnight tacks on my overnight rate regardless of when they get home). My responding text would have stated a reminder that my overnight rate is x, and it covers midnight to 6, but my normal rate applies for the rest of the hours. I would have also clarified if the parent wanted anything specific made for breakfast, kids up at a certain time and whether kids should be wearing play clothes or nice outfits. Some parents have argued that they want to get home at 2 and pay hourly, and I’ve responded that I prefer to sleep uninterrupted, so they are welcome to let me sleep on the couch until 6 since they would be paying me until then or they could be home by midnight and just pay hourly. Lots of parents prefer the flexibility of not needing a set time between midnight and 6, so it works for most.