Nannies who have left their long term families
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Anonymous
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I started my job with my current family several years ago, before I knew what was standard in terms of a nanny contract. Since then, I’ve come to realize that I am not receiving the benefits that I should be. I work 40-50 hours per week, have paid holidays and 5 days PTO per year, and no sick time. We are meeting for coffee this weekend, as I think it’s a conversation better had when no one is tired from a day long day of work and kids are running around. We’ve recently spoke about my employee benefits and they’ve said they are unwilling to budge. If that’s the case, I need to put in my notice and find employment elsewhere.
I love their children dearly, and they are the only thing keeping me here. How can I come to terms with “losing” them in order to do what is better for myself? |
Anonymous
| What exactly are you looking for, OP? |
Anonymous
| I would find a new job first ... |
Anonymous
I want guaranteed hours Mon-Friday, with weekends handled separately. Paid holidays, 10 days vacation and 3 sick days. I understand that this is a significant increase from what i have, and I’m willing to settle for 8 Flex days PTO, with the plan to reassess once MB finishes her maternity leave in the fall. |
Anonymous
I’m located in a city smaller than DC and would worry about them finding out through friends that I’m looking for a new job. I intend to give 30 days notice and I have enough money saved to get through the end of March without employment. |
Anonymous
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The term you want to use when speaking with them is "industry standard."
And it's FINE for them to know you're looking for a new job if they won't give you more. They SHOULD know that that's how much this means to you. |
Anonymous
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I do think you should ask for the 10 days off. Maybe tell them you will take 5 at your choosing and 5 of their choosing?
That seems to be the standard. If they wont do that then I would leave. |
Anonymous
Thank you for that. Do you recommend providing them with the resources I’ve found prior to our meeting so they are not put on the spot? If so, how many days in advance is appropriate? I do intend to let them know that if we cannot come to an agreement I will begin looking for another position. |
Anonymous
If they fire you on the spot or don’t let you do the 30 days you can take unemployment. Just FYI. Also, you should ask 5 days sick not 3. So 15 days total. It’s standard |
Anonymous
Do you have any resources you could share? My research has showed that the standard is 10 vacation days with 50% of employers offering between 2-5 sick days in addition. |
Anonymous
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These are all reasonable requests, particularly for a long term employee!
So here is my feeling about sick days: 3 is pretty standard, across all industries. If you get two weeks PTO of your choosing, and guaranteed hours, then 3 is probably even generous by most standards. Our nannies start off with 12 days of PTO to be used for any purpose (and holidays and guaranteed hours). If you do not get 2 weeks PTO of your own choosing, and especially if you don't get guaranteed hours, then 5 sick days seems much more necessary. |
Anonymous
I don’t think you can collect unemployment if you resign FYI Have you received a raise each year? What are you paid hourly and annually versus what you would like I would factor all of this in so you can be thoughtful about what you’re asking for If the MB is pregnant they’re likely to need a nanny for a long time |
Anonymous
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Your requests are all reasonable and standard. Yes, you should start the process of looking for a new position and make guaranteed hours and sick days/PTO written in stone. You have been taken advantage of.
Start looking today and see what else is out there. Yes, it is so hard to leave the children but hopefully you will part on good terms with your current employer. When you talk to them, be honest and open - BE CALM!!! If they can't do it - they can't do it. Respectfully give your notice. |
Anonymous
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I agree w/the ^^^^ PP above that you should keep things as civil as possible during your conversations w/your bosses.
You do not want to burn any bridges w/them. Since you were w/them so long, you likely will need a good reference from them. Still, you are entitled to ten days of paid vacation in my opinion. And hopefully they are paying you Overtime for any + all hours worked over 40/week. |
Anonymous
They absolutely do not do that. I’ve made the decision to look for employment elsewhere should they not come to a reasonable agreement. |