Split this money with our nanny?

[Anonymous]

My son's epilepsy has resulted in a Medicaid benefit, not based on our income, that allows us to pay a (not medically trained) personal aide $11/hr for 4 hrs/day. We pay our nanny $15/hr take home, on the books (that's her net pay, the gross is higher). To use the Medicaid benefit, we would have to fill out a timesheet for her and submit it to an agency that she would register with. I asked her to register and she didn't seem eager to do it. She wants all the Medicaid money. I'd like to reduce her salary so that we end up splitting the Medicaid money. Or we can just opt not to use the Medicaid benefit. WWYD?

[Anonymous]

I don't understand why your nanny would expect her normal hourly rate plus the $11/hr from medicaid. You should just hire a personal aide for $11/hr for days you need extra help when nanny's not there. So weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son's epilepsy has resulted in a Medicaid benefit, not based on our income, that allows us to pay a (not medically trained) personal aide $11/hr for 4 hrs/day. We pay our nanny $15/hr take home, on the books (that's her net pay, the gross is higher). To use the Medicaid benefit, we would have to fill out a timesheet for her and submit it to an agency that she would register with. I asked her to register and she didn't seem eager to do it. She wants all the Medicaid money. I'd like to reduce her salary so that we end up splitting the Medicaid money. Or we can just opt not to use the Medicaid benefit. WWYD?

She wants to get a raise to $26/hour? for 1/2 the time. This money is to give YOU a break, not her a windfall. Your nanny sounds nuts and, honestly, I would fire her if she refused to register and explain that we'll need to hire someone who will. WTF.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son's epilepsy has resulted in a Medicaid benefit, not based on our income, that allows us to pay a (not medically trained) personal aide $11/hr for 4 hrs/day. We pay our nanny $15/hr take home, on the books (that's her net pay, the gross is higher). To use the Medicaid benefit, we would have to fill out a timesheet for her and submit it to an agency that she would register with. I asked her to register and she didn't seem eager to do it. She wants all the Medicaid money. I'd like to reduce her salary so that we end up splitting the Medicaid money. Or we can just opt not to use the Medicaid benefit. WWYD?

Net doesn't tell us anything, OP. What is her gross? How many kids are there and are there any other special needs other than epilepsy? How many hours per week? What is your general location? What are her normal duties? What education does she have (relevant to childcare)? How much nanny experience does she have, how much is special needs experience and is any specifically experience with children with epililepsy? Are you currently paying on or off the books? In order to know what a fair wage would be, these are important questions.

With all of that said, most special needs nannies fill out the timesheet but earn far beyond that meager amount, certainly more than $15-17 gross per hour. I would suggest letting her know that you need to renegotiate your contract. Filling out the contract should be required as part of the weekly duties. Gross pay is negotiated per hour, and you specifically state that you will pay the difference between the $11/hour and gross for all covered hours, then you will cover all additional hours at the full amount, and over time will be paid at 1.5 times the gross rate. Medicaid is worded so that you have respite care each day, but you need more than that. If she's not willing to comply, find someone else.

Special needs nannies learn quickly that it's not just about learning about a specific child's needs. They frequently work closely with parents, pediatrician, specialists, school, etc. Part of their duties is to maximize the parent's ability to have care for the child, so filling out Medicaid time sheets is well within the scope of the position, and given how expensive it is to have all the help necessary for the child, most parents make it non negotiable. Either she understands this or she doesn't.

[Anonymous]

She said she'd split it, so the nanny would earn an additional 5.50 on top of her current rate. Nanny wants current rate+$11.

I'd find out what it would cost to replace her altogether, and offer her this new jon.

[Anonymous]

op: She has been with us 7 years, and learned about meds, how to use feeding tube etc during my son's illness, when I missed 4 months of work. Her gross pay is $1050/week, we pay the IRS her full tax bill.

[Anonymous]

I was originally team "hells to the no," but then I did the math. Even if you pay all of her taxes, that $1050/wk works out to barely $16/hr gross rate. It doesn't put her in a high enough tax bracket to be worth a whole lot. AND it means a 60 hour work week if you're paying legal OT, and a 75 hour work week if you aren't.

So that means she is grossly underpaid for 7 years of work, period, and with a special needs charge. Give her all of the Medicaid money. It raises her pay to $26/hr (gross, this will be taxed), true, but only for 4 hours a day. The rest of the day will be at whatever rate you've always done.

[Anonymous]

op: She comes at 7 am and leaves at 6 pm M-F. Most school days, unless he is resting from morning seizures, he goes to school at 8:25 and comes home at 2:45. She does some chores during that time, but not enough to take nearly that much time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:op: She comes at 7 am and leaves at 6 pm M-F. Most school days, unless he is resting from morning seizures, he goes to school at 8:25 and comes home at 2:45. She does some chores during that time, but not enough to take nearly that much time.

She works 11 hours a day for $15/hr. Are you paying OT? Probably not. I hope she reads this and finally realizes that you are using her and finds a new job. After 7 years with all that she does, she should be making 50/hr.

[Anonymous]

That money should go to the nanny because she earned it IMO. She has been loyal and is trained to handle your child plus can do tube feeding and safely administer his medication which are things medical assistants and nurses are paid $30/h to do. Good luck finding a nanny or medically trained person to take this job with a special need child for $11/h or $16/h. Glad nanny is sticker up for herself.

[Anonymous]

With the schedule you describe, she has a dedicated 5.5 hours a day with your child every day, plus longer with him on some days. That 4 hours of an additional $11 actually brings her compensation closer to what it should be. You're not going to find a skilled provider for less.

This woman has given you a tremendously good deal all these years, probably because she knew you couldn't afford more and she's a good person. Now she sees that you could potentially reward her for the care, years of loyalty, and willingness to do what's necessary, but instead of using the money to pay for something most people can't afford to begin with, you want to use part of it to help your finances.

You are going to lose her. You don't get it. She never thought she was being paid well, but she thought you were all in it together. Now she's wondering if she's being used, and if you ever cared about her as much as she has cared about your family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:op: She comes at 7 am and leaves at 6 pm M-F. Most school days, unless he is resting from morning seizures, he goes to school at 8:25 and comes home at 2:45. She does some chores during that time, but not enough to take nearly that much time.

So on school days, unless he's resting from a seizure so he stays longer with her? He goes to school at 8.25, returns at 2.45, she leaves at 6. Okay, so on a normal day, an hour and 25 minutes in the morning, 3 hours and 15 in the afternoon, plus chores, but you think it doesn't take long, so I'm figuring it at 2 hours per day. So, that's 6 hours and 40 minutes per day, 33.33 hours per week.

You said $1050/week. So $31.50 per hour, definitely great, even for a special needs nanny.

However, then you have weeks off of school.

You're looking at 55 hours per week, so $16.80 per hour, nowhere high enough for a special needs nanny, especially someone who has known the child for 7 years and knows how to handle that child's needs.

You need to negotiate a specific rate per hour, probably at least $28/hour, given her time with your family. Forget about the weekly rate, that's part of the issue and why she feels entitled to the Medicaid money. She needs to track hours for chores or you need to set a prescribed number of hours for chores. Finally, she needs to understand that the Medicaid money is intended to help YOU, and to be her pay, therefore you will pay the difference for the first four hours per day, then the full rate per hour for the rest. As I said before, you really, really need to make this a condition of employment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:op: She comes at 7 am and leaves at 6 pm M-F. Most school days, unless he is resting from morning seizures, he goes to school at 8:25 and comes home at 2:45. She does some chores during that time, but not enough to take nearly that much time.

So on school days, unless he's resting from a seizure so he stays longer with her? He goes to school at 8.25, returns at 2.45, she leaves at 6. Okay, so on a normal day, an hour and 25 minutes in the morning, 3 hours and 15 in the afternoon, plus chores, but you think it doesn't take long, so I'm figuring it at 2 hours per day. So, that's 6 hours and 40 minutes per day, 33.33 hours per week.

You said $1050/week. So $31.50 per hour, definitely great, even for a special needs nanny.

However, then you have weeks off of school.

You're looking at 55 hours per week, so $16.80 per hour, nowhere high enough for a special needs nanny, especially someone who has known the child for 7 years and knows how to handle that child's needs.

You need to negotiate a specific rate per hour, probably at least $28/hour, given her time with your family. Forget about the weekly rate, that's part of the issue and why she feels entitled to the Medicaid money. She needs to track hours for chores or you need to set a prescribed number of hours for chores. Finally, she needs to understand that the Medicaid money is intended to help YOU, and to be her pay, therefore you will pay the difference for the first four hours per day, then the full rate per hour for the rest. As I said before, you really, really need to make this a condition of employment.

This is not how nannies work. They don't "clock out" in the middle of the day just because the kid isn't there. They are paid for all of the time they are expected to be available. Maybe she would agree to this for a higher hourly wage, but then OP loses the absolute certainty that the nanny will be available at the drop of a hat if her child has a seizure at school. If the nanny clocks out, she could be in an appointment, at lunch, exercising, whatever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:op: She comes at 7 am and leaves at 6 pm M-F. Most school days, unless he is resting from morning seizures, he goes to school at 8:25 and comes home at 2:45. She does some chores during that time, but not enough to take nearly that much time.

So on school days, unless he's resting from a seizure so he stays longer with her? He goes to school at 8.25, returns at 2.45, she leaves at 6. Okay, so on a normal day, an hour and 25 minutes in the morning, 3 hours and 15 in the afternoon, plus chores, but you think it doesn't take long, so I'm figuring it at 2 hours per day. So, that's 6 hours and 40 minutes per day, 33.33 hours per week.

You said $1050/week. So $31.50 per hour, definitely great, even for a special needs nanny.

However, then you have weeks off of school.

You're looking at 55 hours per week, so $16.80 per hour, nowhere high enough for a special needs nanny, especially someone who has known the child for 7 years and knows how to handle that child's needs.

You need to negotiate a specific rate per hour, probably at least $28/hour, given her time with your family. Forget about the weekly rate, that's part of the issue and why she feels entitled to the Medicaid money. She needs to track hours for chores or you need to set a prescribed number of hours for chores. Finally, she needs to understand that the Medicaid money is intended to help YOU, and to be her pay, therefore you will pay the difference for the first four hours per day, then the full rate per hour for the rest. As I said before, you really, really need to make this a condition of employment.

This is not how nannies work. They don't "clock out" in the middle of the day just because the kid isn't there. They are paid for all of the time they are expected to be available. Maybe she would agree to this for a higher hourly wage, but then OP loses the absolute certainty that the nanny will be available at the drop of a hat if her child has a seizure at school. If the nanny clocks out, she could be in an appointment, at lunch, exercising, whatever.

I agree completely. I wasn’t tackling lack of availability because OP made it clear that the nanny has those hours off. However, if she wants the nanny available, as most parents in her situation would, the nanny needs to be made aware that she’s being paid to be available so that she doesn’t do anything else, and she needs to be paid accordingly.