Sad Nanny!:(
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Anonymous
| have been a Nanny for a family for five years. I have know once kids were going to school full time I would no longer be needed full time. I just found out that I won't be needed full time this summer. I feel heartbroken! I really thought I was going to have one last summer with them. It's not the first time I have to move on from a long term family. I know as time goes on it will get easier. I was just not expecting to feel so awful & sad. I feel like no one understands how hard it is to say goodbye. I would love more then anything to keep working for them this summer. They want to cut my hours in half. I can't do that Because I need to work full time to pay my rent and bills. On top of that I feel so guilty not staying. How the kids asre going react when I won't be caring for the this summer. Sorry I know this is long! I just needed to vent. Thanks! |
Anonymous
| The children will be damaged if the parents don't allow them to continue their relationship with you. |
Anonymous
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I am so sorry, OP - this is a situation all nannies will face and it never gets easier.
I was able to set aside a special time every week to see my first charge and it has been wonderful. My second charges, I see about once a months and still occasionally babysit for them on weekends. All of my employers understand the importance of keeping a limited but consistent presence in their children's lives until they no longer need it. It is hard when a little charge asks "are you going to be here when I wake up?" or "Can you hold me for a long time?" Make sure you have a set time to see your former charges every time you leave them. A specific "I will see you next Wednesday after school". It makes things easier. And as much as you don't think it will happen, when you start with a new family and a new baby - the loving bond forms all over again. |
Anonymous
Bull! Children are resilient. OP, this was a job and you knew that it would end when these children started school. Act like a professional and an adult. On to your next job and remember that that job will also end. |
Anonymous
It is important that the children know that this central figure in their upbringing doesn't simply vanish and that their shared connection/love was real. I met a woman at the hair salon who overheard me talking about our nanny and the woman told me that she was devastated at six when her nanny simply did not show up one day and never came back. She found out later that her mother just fired the nanny when she thought her daughter didn't need her anymore. This woman interrupted us to tell me - a stranger - this story and how it had long term effects on her. It is easy enough to keep a beloved caregiver in my children's lives. |
Anonymous
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I am on my third nanny family and I still see all my former charges often. This year, the three families got together and had a photographer take a picture of all the kids together. It is the best gift I have ever received!
Talk to your employer about how you can stay in your charges' lives. And open your heart to a new child. I promise you the love and connection will be there. |
Anonymous
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You still have over five months together!
And ask about the summer plans. If you don't find a full time job right away, maybe there will be weeks they can use you. If you're interested, let them know you'd be interested in sitting occasionally. |
Anonymous
I'm surprised about the timing because usually child care is more necessary in the summer when the kids are out of school. Is a grandparent stepping in or something? (Because that might not work out and might be why they want you part-time.) Or are the parents putting the kids in camps full-time? |
Anonymous
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Look for a new job with a newborn, OP - it is good for the soul! And it won't feel like you are just replacing your current charges or comparing them.
Talk to your employer about how you can transition in a way that is easiest for the children and how you can see them. I agree with the above poster that you should never leave without a firm day and time that you will return - something for the kids to hold on to. |
Anonymous
| This is the op. Thanks for all your helpful response. I do plan on staying in touch with the family. The mother got a new job & is only going to be working 20 hours a week. That's all the childcare they need for summer. In fall the mother will be able to get them ready before school & be home in time to get them off the bus. I just need to work fulltime. Don't know if I can find another part time job that will work. It's just a lot to figure out when it's also such a personal relationship with kids. |
Anonymous
| Hugs OP just went through the same thing |
Anonymous
| Summers are easier for finding part time work because so many kids are out of school. So your chances are probably pretty good, but I would start looking now! |
Anonymous
That is the sweetest thing. Loe that all three families took the time to do that for you. That clearly speaks of the impact you have had on them. |
Anonymous
+1 Such a lovely thing to do for their (former) nanny! OP - don't prolong the agony. Find a full time job starting when your charges only need you part time and visit or babysit them once a week. Trust me - otherwise you will feel resentful and not give 100% to your new summer part time position. And you will just have to do the job search all over again. |
Anonymous
+2. Look for a new job once, OP. Don't burn out your references or put yourself through it twice. |