| I was referred to a family by a regular client and need to find a way to politely turn them down without burning a bridge. I live in SF and my usual rate is $30/hr. I met an out of town family who was really sweet and agreed to babysit for then at $20/hr only because I literally never saw the kids, they were always asleep when I arrived and it was just basic babysitting in a hotel. I work for them all the time when they come to town and I'm fine with $20/hr for that type of gig. This family put me in touch with their friends who are in town, who need care during the day for their 10 month old twins. Again, I was only going to charge $20/hr because of my existing relationship with their friends. A big discount, in SF!! I work for my regular family at $30/hr but they are away for the summer (I have guaranteed hours so I'm still paid but was going to work at but while they're away). Anyway, the family would like to pay me $12/hr. I understand where they come from (another country) this is a normal rate, but I was really insulted. That's not even minimum wage in California!! It's twins, daytime hours and the parents are home all day which is not an easy job. How do I politely email them to let them know I am unwilling to work for this rate, without burning a bridge with the family who recommended me? I need to write a polite message. |
| Tell the other families you are raising your rates. If you were willing to accept a lower rate for several families recently, it means that is what your current rate is being publicized as $20. |
[b] But from $20 to $12??? |
| Thank you for considering me for this position. My current hourly rate is $30.00 for new clients. Let me know if I can send you a list of nanny agencies or websites that might helpful in finding someone within your price range. |
| Just tell them "Oh, I'm sure you didn't know, but San Francisco is the most expensive city in America to live in, and thus wages are higher here. For example, absolute minimum legal wage is $13 per hour. I charge your friends Bob and Jean $20 an hour to watch their children while they're sleeping, so I wouldn't be able to charge less than $25 for infant twins during waking hours. I understand if you want to keep looking for someone who charges a lower rate." |
| Op here, thanks for the responses! It's just really insulting because they are also staying in a $20k monthly rental and apparently $12 for childcare is acceptable. At this point even if they paid my rate I don't want the job but want to turn it down politely. |
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Just say you are unavailable. I have had families try to "steal me away" from my wonderful full time job, bragging that they would pay me $20 an hour. I never tell them that I currently earn $28 and hour for one child. I just say that I love my job and have no intention of leaving but thank them for the compliment.
Just say that you are unable to work for them and offer them the names of agencies in your area. Tell the referral family that you couldn't take the job, too - but you don't need to go into why. |
| Its not insulting, that is what they are willing to pay. You cannot compare it to minimum wage or a salary when it is tax free money. |
| You tell them your hourly rate. You are a fool for discounting your rate. |
Sure you can - OP will still have to pay taxes on it (legally). But I agree, it probably isn't insulting - the parents just don't realize the going rate. Just politely decline, OP - say you are not available. If the referring family asks why you didn't take the job just say you have too many conflicts with other plans. |
| Hello $12 is insulting unless you're 14 years old or live in Rural Alabama. Give me a break!! LA, NYC, SF no one pays $12 for childcare! Even the illegals want at least $15! |
I'd go with a version of this. Thank you for considering me, but I don't think I'm a solution for you as my hourly rate is $30/hour. On occasion I have discounted that to $20 for friends of my employers and evening coverage when the kids are asleep. Best of luck to you in your search. On a separate note, I don't think it's particularly kosher that you're double dipping. If you're being paid an hourly rate of $20/hr for an entire season when you aren't working, and you're considering adding on a full-time position to that, it just somehow seems shady OP. Sweet gig of course, but shady. |
[b] Op here- Thank you for the suggestion about what to send to the referral family, it sounds good! I've been with my current nanny family for 6 years and when they go away for the summer they pay me so the they will have a nanny when they return in September. In previous years I had to travel with them most of the summer but the kids are older now. They know I babysit on the side because they are my reference when families ask me to work weekends/when they go away. |
| ^^ op again- I am also staying at their house feeding the cats while they go away so this arrangement works for us. |
Don't be insulted. They don't KNOW the going rate here. They're offering what they believe is reasonable for where they come from. They don't realize. |