Do you ever feel feel resentful of paying your nanny for what you do?

[Anonymous]

Whenever my MB and her sisters go out for the day with DD (charge) I always feel MB gets in a weird mood and doesn't seem as appreciative as normal. It is like she realises she is paying me for what she and her sisters do for free. Is this a common MB feeling?

[Anonymous]

No, but our DD's nanny is MUCH better with the kids than I am.

[Anonymous]

What about if you didn't feel like your nanny was better though? (Most moms would of course say they were better and rightly so) ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What about if you didn't feel like your nanny was better though? (Most moms would of course say they were better and rightly so) ?

I can't imagine that. I specifically wanted to hire someone who was better with children than I am. That's really what makes them valuable in their own right.

[Anonymous]

No, of course not. My child is not your child and I am grateful that you (my nanny) are as good to my DD as I am.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What about if you didn't feel like your nanny was better though? (Most moms would of course say they were better and rightly so) ?

It is like comparing apples to oranges. And I actually don't think I teach my child better than our nanny does.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What about if you didn't feel like your nanny was better though? (Most moms would of course say they were better and rightly so) ?

I don't feel like my nanny is better, but I am not resentful of paying her. As a previous poster said, my child is not her child, and she is here to provide a service to my family. If I go to a restaurant it doesn't matter if I think my cooking is better. If someone else prepared my food, I am not resentful of paying for it.

I will tell you that I am resentful of having to pay my nanny in after-tax dollars that she then gets taxed on as well. I think that is a crock of shit, but it is in no way my nanny's fault.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What about if you didn't feel like your nanny was better though? (Most moms would of course say they were better and rightly so) ?

I don't feel like my nanny is better, but I am not resentful of paying her. As a previous poster said, my child is not her child, and she is here to provide a service to my family. If I go to a restaurant it doesn't matter if I think my cooking is better. If someone else prepared my food, I am not resentful of paying for it.

I will tell you that I am resentful of having to pay my nanny in after-tax dollars that she then gets taxed on as well. I think that is a crock of shit, but it is in no way my nanny's fault.

What does this mean? That you paid income tax on those dollars, and it bothers you that the nanny has to, also?

So you would only tax corporate profits? No income taxes at all?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What about if you didn't feel like your nanny was better though? (Most moms would of course say they were better and rightly so) ?

I don't feel like my nanny is better, but I am not resentful of paying her. As a previous poster said, my child is not her child, and she is here to provide a service to my family. If I go to a restaurant it doesn't matter if I think my cooking is better. If someone else prepared my food, I am not resentful of paying for it.

I will tell you that I am resentful of having to pay my nanny in after-tax dollars that she then gets taxed on as well. I think that is a crock of shit, but it is in no way my nanny's fault.

What does this mean? That you paid income tax on those dollars, and it bothers you that the nanny has to, also?

So you would only tax corporate profits? No income taxes at all?

No. But I would like to put her on my business payroll. It it just painful to know how much I have to make in order to pay my nanny a living wage.

[Anonymous]

I actually do think that people should be able to pay for childcare w/ pre-tax dollars. The fact that I can only do so up to $5000 (I think is the limit?) is laughable given the cost of childcare around here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whenever my MB and her sisters go out for the day with DD (charge) I always feel MB gets in a weird mood and doesn't seem as appreciative as normal. It is like she realises she is paying me for what she and her sisters do for free. Is this a common MB feeling?

I don't understand.
Your MB takes the child out herself some days yet still pays you while she is doing the childcare duties? Sounds like bonus paid vacation break for you! And who is supposed tine appreciative? She likely feels awkward paying so much for childcare and not using it some days. But she loves being with her child as much as possible so pays this retainer to you.

[Anonymous]

OP here. No, I meant when I am not on duty, like of a weekend. It is like she starts to think 'Wow, We have had such a great day and Larla gets paid for this. '

[Anonymous]

No, never. I am grateful to my nanny for being great with the kids. As a manager, I pay a lot of people at work to do things I could do better myself. I pay a travel agent to plan a trip for me that I could do well myself and would also enjoy doing.

I love my job and can't take good care of my kids while I do it. Thus I pay my awesome nanny. The only rational reason to feel this way is if you'd rather be home with your kids than working. I know some moms feel this way but I don't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What about if you didn't feel like your nanny was better though? (Most moms would of course say they were better and rightly so) ?

I don't feel like my nanny is better, but I am not resentful of paying her. As a previous poster said, my child is not her child, and she is here to provide a service to my family. If I go to a restaurant it doesn't matter if I think my cooking is better. If someone else prepared my food, I am not resentful of paying for it.

I will tell you that I am resentful of having to pay my nanny in after-tax dollars that she then gets taxed on as well. I think that is a crock of shit, but it is in no way my nanny's fault.

What does this mean? That you paid income tax on those dollars, and it bothers you that the nanny has to, also?

So you would only tax corporate profits? No income taxes at all?

No. But I would like to put her on my business payroll. It it just painful to know how much I have to make in order to pay my nanny a living wage.

Well, I don't even own a business, and I'd like to do this, too. But a nanny isn't a business expense; she's a personal luxury. There are cheaper forms of child care, and a nanny could become a huge tax shelter. In this case, I agree with the tax code.

[Anonymous]

How do you know what she is thinking?