Am I right to feel hurt?

[Anonymous]

My babysitter recently informed us that she doesn't want to sit for our family anymore. She has been our go to sitter for the past two years and has a great relationship with DD and DS. Do I have a right to feel hurt and rejected after she has made this decision? We've talked about it and she hasn't indicated that there has been any issues or reasons why she just up and quite.

[Anonymous]

Did she say she doesnt want to or that she can't anymore?

[Anonymous]

Need more facts. Maybe she isn't baby sitting much anymore, maybe she wants more time to do other things, different types of jobs or schools. Maybe her personal life has changed (e.g., she had more free time to sit before but doesn't know) and that's affected her schedule. Maybe she's burnt out. Maybe she's depressed or has other health issues that you have no idea about.

There could be a million reasons why that don't have anything to do with you or your family.

Try not to be mad or sad about it, wish her well and start looking for a new sitter.

[Anonymous]

Maybe she felt you took advantage in some way? Either that or she didn't feel appreciated.
You could send her an email saying how much you value her but like the others said, it may just be that she wants to move onto different work or has something personal going on which she doesn't want you to know about.
Could be nothing personal in other words.

[Anonymous]

You can absolutely feel hurt. They're your feelings. No one can tell you how to feel.

However, she should be able to respectfully decline babysitting for you. That's her decision.

[Anonymous]

She probably has a boyfriend who is grumbling about how they don't spend enough time together.

[Anonymous]

Unless you're leaving out information on WHY she is leaving, you don't know what's going on. I used to tutor and I needed to cut back on hours and told families that I was stopping (with notice). I had one family - who I had a wonderful relationship with - send me a horrible email about how I hurt them what a horrible, childish person I was, then tell mutual friends the same thing. The only reason I was stopping was because I wanted more free time! It was nothing personal.

[Anonymous]

She actually said she doesn't want to sit for your family anymore? Or, she let you know she wouldn't be available to sit for you anymore?

If it was the first, then, yes, I would be hurt with no more explanation. If it's the second, it could mean anything, including that she's at a point in her life where her time is more important to her than babysitting money.

[Anonymous]

The thing is moms and dads get angry/hurt when we quit jobs but they let go of us without a moments thought. I would like to think my MB would feel hurt if I quit but I don't think so. Us child carers want to feel like we mean something, maybe she felt she didn't mean much and it wouldn't matter if she left?