New baby

[Anonymous]

We had a part time nanny for my three year old who is in school part time as wel. I also have a two month old and when I return to work, our nanny will be transitioning to full time. She is still with us part time and occasionally will help me with my younger child, but mostly she's there for my toddler since I'm maternity leave. I notice when she helps me with my baby, she basically ignores my toddler. How do nannies manage a toddler and an infant who has to be carried around and held? Maybe I am being unreasonable as my three year old is able to play alone but I still feel bad for him.

[Anonymous]

Any experienced nanny can handle two happily. Coach your nanny on how you do it and stress the importance of engaging both children at the same time.

[Anonymous]

Do you know if she has cared for more than one child in her former positions?

[Anonymous]

OP here, yes she has but they were school aged.

[Anonymous]

Yeah she shouldn't be ignoring the older one. What I usually do is involve the older kid in the care of the baby such as "let's feed baby together or help me sing to baby while I change her" and when the baby is asleep I just make sure to play with the other one as much as possible. Her lack of experience with multiples is obvious.

[Anonymous]

Is it possible that she is giving more attention to the infant because you are there watching? If it is only occasional right now, this could be the case as your older child has had her undivided attention for the majority of the time.

I agree a good nanny should be able to multitask with 2 children. However at any point in time one might require more attention than the other.

I also agree that mentoring and coaching how you want your children cared for together is a smart move.

[Anonymous]

I just spoke to her about all this and if she could handle. She said it may be difficult to handle the two kids prior to 3/6 months but definitely prior to 3 months because of all the attention the baby requires. I disagree because for now he sleeps a lot and really doesn't require the same mental attention as the toddler. Only issue I see is that he would need to be carried around. Unfortunately I go back to work at 2 months so it's not an option to wait until 3 or 6 months. Is it time to say maybe she was a great part time nanny for my older child but maybe not the best for a full time position? Or is she right?
Multi tasking position?

[Anonymous]

Move on. Find a nanny who knows how to manage a young infant and a toddler at the same time. It's pretty standard nanny stuff and she clearly doesn't know how to do it and doesn't seem particularly interested in putting forth effort to figure it out. Also saying she will be more comfortable when baby is older shows how inexperienced she is with this balance. Baby is only going to need more and more attention as time goes on. Move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Move on. Find a nanny who knows how to manage a young infant and a toddler at the same time. It's pretty standard nanny stuff and she clearly doesn't know how to do it and doesn't seem particularly interested in putting forth effort to figure it out. Also saying she will be more comfortable when baby is older shows how inexperienced she is with this balance. Baby is only going to need more and more attention as time goes on. Move on.

How many nannies has the older child already had?

[Anonymous]

Op, you know your situation better than the rest of isn't if you're happy with the care she has given our older the, and with the car she gives the baby, I'd think twice before moving on. There are a lot of safety concerns with young babies and with any nanny there will enjoy an adjustment period as everyone gets to know eachother. With your current situation your nanny only needs to get to know your baby. Continuity of care for your ref child will be nice for them too. I'd be more worried if your nanny ignored the baby and favored your older child.

[Anonymous]

Fair points everyone. My older one has only had her as a nanny, prior to that he was in daycare. This nanny has been with us since June.

[Anonymous]

I could handle this position with ease! But depending on your compensation package, you may not get wualified candidates applying to your position.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I could handle this position with ease! But depending on your compensation package, you may not get wualified candidates applying to your position.

it's a very fair, above average pay package. thanks!

[Anonymous]

Maybe she is inexperienced with newborns and wants to make sure she is handling the baby properly.

I would give her some time to find her groove.