Pushy job offer

[Anonymous]

I interviewed with a couple families over the last couple weeks. I got two offers and will be getting the second offers contact tomorrow. job offered with contract right away. I like the first family more but I still want to see what the other family is offering. DB and MB from the first offer really want me as I got the job the next day ( Tuesday) after I interviewed. They gave me a deadline of this weekend. We went back and forth about the terms, pay, etc., and I told them I will give an answer by tomorrow or Saturday morning. The dad has reached out twice since then to reiterate their interest and " sweeten" the offer. The mom has texted me today if I made a decision. I understand they are excited but I feel they are being pushy. Is this a red flag?

[Anonymous]

I don't want to seem ungrateful but I think it's foolish of me not to see what the other family is offering.

[Anonymous]

Let them fight over you. Nothing wrong with that.

There just aren't that many good nannies out there, and they know it.

[Anonymous]

Your hesitation would be a red flag for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your hesitation would be a red flag for me.

Silly troll again.

[Anonymous]

You should accept it today and stop waiting for an imaginary offer that may never come from that other family. You can always back out if something good comes along. So why let go of the bird in hand?

[Anonymous]

If it's a good job take it without too much delay.

[Anonymous]

It's only a red flag if you have told them that you are waiting for another offer. If I was hiring and a nanny said that she needed time to think about it without telling me why, it would come across as not really wanting to work with me and I might be hesitant to hire her. If she said she was waiting on another offer I'd understand and back off.

[Anonymous]

If this weekend is the deadline, then why are they being pushy on Friday morning? I'm an MB but that would be a red flag for ME! I know it's hard to find a great nanny but speaking as someone who is currently trying to help our nanny find a job I am really shocked by what some prospective employers find acceptable.

[Anonymous]

I'm an MB.

I don't love that they are not respecting what you told them and that potentially you are feeling badgered.

On the other hand, it's nice to be in a position where they are strengthening their offer to you. Clearly they are very anxious to have this settled. And if they know you have another offer then they are just trying to make theirs be the most attractive - which I can understand and appreciate.

What do you know about their history in terms of any prior nannies or childcare? For instance, if you would be the third (or more) nanny they've hired, and they're being this aggressive, then I would think this is a pretty serious red flag. If you're their first nanny and they're just terrified new parents, then maybe this isn't as worrisome.

A lot comes down to your gut instincts. If you liked the family that is pursuing you aggressively the best, if you are confident and experienced enough to know that you got a good read on both potential job opportunities, and if they are making the terms of employment really attractive, then great.

You could just say "Thank you so much. I really appreciate how attractive you are making this offer, but I do need to be as professional with the other family that has interviewed me as I want to be with you. I promise you I'll get back to you by tomorrow (Saturday.)"

Then you get in touch w/ the other family and tell them that you have an offer on the table to which you need to respond today but you didn't want to accept that one without talking with them first.

You are in the ideal position - the chance to have two potential employers vying for you. But you also need to be very deft in your management of that so that hopefully you come out w/ the best possible employment for yourself, without damaging the relationship with your future employers in any way.

Good luck OP!!

[Anonymous]

When do you plan to make your choice, OP?

[Anonymous]

No, I do not think the first family is being too pushy.

Searching for the right person to care for your child is a very time-consuming & important task.

They finally met someone who they feel is a perfect fit for their family and they don't want to go back to the drawing board + continue their search all over again.

I can see their perspective.

And you, on the other hand do not feel ready to commit to them until you find out what the other family will give you.
After all, this is your future we are talking about here.

Your livelihood is your work so you need to see what's right for you.
Weighing your options is a smart move. The family should understand this.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I did tell them I have anther offer on the table. I know they really like me since they offered me the job ASAP after interviewing several other nannies. This is their first child and first nanny. I did get the contract from the other family. The mom from the first one texted me again this morning to reiterate how much they want me, etc. I plan to accept an offer later today after I hash a couple things out with the other family.

[Anonymous]

Well, then go with the one that offers the best overall compensation of course, but don't underestimate being hired by people who REALLY want you.

Congrats OP. Many would love to be in your position.

[Anonymous]

IMO, when a parent, especially a first time parent, meets a caregiver they can see themselves leaving their new kid with, they want to seal the deal ASAP.
I have only got that "she's the one, she's our nanny" feeling from 3 people in two nanny searches (we moved cities, so had to start again).
I do have more patience though, I would let someone make up their own mind with time and space. Our current nanny took 72 hours to decide, I presume she had another interview and offer, and I left her alone the whole time.