Race issues and three year old...

[Anonymous]

I live in a small town, which is mostly white. On Friday I took my 3 year old charge to the public pool. There was a girl swimming there who was black, and very dark skinned. My charge looked at her, then asked me why her skin "looked funny." I said matter of factly "because she is black," and I said that everyone's skin is a little different in color (I pointed out that my skin is slightly darker than my charges skin, even though we're both white). My charge kept saying very uncomfortable things, even going so far as to say that black skin "isn't pretty." I said I thought her dark skin was very beautiful, and beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Later that day at the park we saw a cute little Hispanic baby and I pointed out how cute he was, even though his skin was a different color than ours. I also pointed out a couple of characters in my charges picture books that are black, and said even though our skin might be different colors, we're all normal people with feelings on the inside. My charge listened, but somehow didn't seem convinced.

Is there anything else I should do? Should I bring this up to MB? That incident made me feel very uncomfortable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I live in a small town, which is mostly white. On Friday I took my 3 year old charge to the public pool. There was a girl swimming there who was black, and very dark skinned. My charge looked at her, then asked me why her skin "looked funny." I said matter of factly "because she is black," and I said that everyone's skin is a little different in color (I pointed out that my skin is slightly darker than my charges skin, even though we're both white). My charge kept saying very uncomfortable things, even going so far as to say that black skin "isn't pretty." I said I thought her dark skin was very beautiful, and beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Later that day at the park we saw a cute little Hispanic baby and I pointed out how cute he was, even though his skin was a different color than ours. I also pointed out a couple of characters in my charges picture books that are black, and said even though our skin might be different colors, we're all normal people with feelings on the inside. My charge listened, but somehow didn't seem convinced.

Is there anything else I should do? Should I bring this up to MB? That incident made me feel very uncomfortable.

A nanny here, bored. It's normal that children ask about color it happen righ about 3years old when they start to learn about self. He just saw a different color and want to know why some children have darker color. It's simple. Everyone have different color and some white skin can be ugly just like some black skin can be pretty. Maybe he was not satisfy with what u said but it's always nice to read books about diversity so children learn and understand.

[Anonymous]

Keep talking about it. Read the chapter in Nurture Shock about race.

[Anonymous]

I think you handled that beautifully OP. Keep the dialogue open and keep doing what you're doing. I'd mention it to the parents, hopefully they're on board with following your lead.

[Anonymous]

I like to do a lesson with all my nanny children on diversity ( I'm black if that matters) using Todd Parr ' It's ok to be different '
It's a fantastic book. I'm a huge Todd Parr fan. After o read it to my last 4 yr old charge we went to the zoo, pointed and said "it's ok to have wheels" lol

[Anonymous]

Never needed to say anything to our kid about races. He just saw us in real life treat everyone the same.

When he got married, his best man was his (real) African friend... yeah black.

No one cared.

[Anonymous]

I have being a nanny for many years, and own an AA in Early Child Hood Development. Ones, a cute little 3 years old compare my skin to his. He wants to know why my skin was brown but his was a little lighter. I talk to him about how people skin differ from others and even shown him books about people a around the world. My goal was to teach him that people skin can be very different in color and depend whitch part of the world people live, their skin look different.

I feel that when children ask is because they want to know and it's always beneficial to teach children facts in a Developmental Appropiate ways.

[Anonymous]

I think you handled the situation very well OP.

It will take some time, but eventually your charge will come around.

You can always casually mention this incident to her Mother + perhaps she will be able to offer up some extra advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Never needed to say anything to our kid about races. He just saw us in real life treat everyone the same.

When he got married, his best man was his (real) African friend... yeah black.

No one cared.

Don't break your hand patting yourself on the back. And if you believe in treating everyone equally why worry if your son has a black best friend

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Never needed to say anything to our kid about races. He just saw us in real life treat everyone the same.

When he got married, his best man was his (real) African friend... yeah black.

No one cared.

Good point, race should be a non issue because it's a non issue. Not because it's an issue.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't be that concerned but keep talking to her a couple more times about how people can have different skin colors.

She may have thought that black skin didn't look pretty but I'll bet that she thinks red polka dot shirts or shirt with Thomas are fantastic and never heard of the little black dress or a sleek little sports car. They will soon learn the beauty of everything. He/she is just commenting because it is totally new.

[Anonymous]

"sleek little black sports car," I meant to say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Never needed to say anything to our kid about races. He just saw us in real life treat everyone the same.

When he got married, his best man was his (real) African friend... yeah black.

No one cared.

Don't break your hand patting yourself on the back. And if you believe in treating everyone equally why worry if your son has a black best friend

+1
I bet they even allowed him to eat with them too lol